Author Topic: What's up from AfroMann  (Read 692 times)

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Offline braden

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Re: What's up from AfroMann
« Reply #7 on: March 20, 2009, 12:13:00 PM »
Quote from: AfroMann
No, I'm not that guy but when my hair gets long, it gets BIG for a white guy. AfroMann has been my XBox Live gamertag for like 6 years now. People are always singing that song to me, though.

bman50317 thanks for being there, bro. I will need help on this ride. Using is not an option but not using will be a bitch at times. Helps to have friends.

And edromero, yeah, there was a lot more to it than the dipping but the fact that I hid something from her for so long hurt her deeply. I wasn't man enough to speak my truth and deal with this years and years ago. You can't keep up a lie like this forever. She nearly busted my many times and I lied like a fool to get out of it. So not only did I lose trust, I lost respect because I wouldn't own up. Lying was such a habit that it invaded other parts of our lives. It sucks but I'm doing an incredible amount of work at this time trying to finally grow up at 41. Lots of self-help reading, prayer, affermations, exercise, journaling, working with a guru-guy, etc. I'm not who I was 6 weeks ago by any stretch. Just had this one stupid fucking habit tagging along that needs the boot...
Didn't get this bad with my wife, but I can certainly understand what you are saying. Sort of like that phrase, "Hell hath no furry..." Well scorning includes being lied to. You hit it on the head...it's about trust and deceit.

Good for you on your quit. You can do it. We're all a bunch of frickin dip-junkies doing our best to stay away from that shit. It's a bigger accomplishment than most may realize, especially those that aren't addicts (I hate saying that word, but it's true).

I selectively show my wife some stuff from this site. It helped her understand the power of this shit  that it wasn't about her...if it were simple to quit, would have done it years ago...etc.

Don't know if it would help in your case, but just a thought. Certainly won't get you forgiven, but may help her to understand a bit that this is some nasty shit we're fighting here...and it's something that has made liars out of a lot of otherwise really good men.

Good luck Bro

Offline AfroMann

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Re: What's up from AfroMann
« Reply #6 on: March 20, 2009, 12:11:00 PM »
LOL-ed at the vid, ProfessorPinch! Thanks, man, I need a lot of good laughs lately.

Peace,
AfroMann

Offline ProfessorPinch

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Re: What's up from AfroMann
« Reply #5 on: March 20, 2009, 11:53:00 AM »
So, you're an Afro Ninja Dipper, eh? I finally owned up to my addiction 99 days ago. You can do this.
dictum meum pactum

Offline AfroMann

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Re: What's up from AfroMann
« Reply #4 on: March 20, 2009, 11:37:00 AM »
No, I'm not that guy but when my hair gets long, it gets BIG for a white guy. AfroMann has been my XBox Live gamertag for like 6 years now. People are always singing that song to me, though.

bman50317 thanks for being there, bro. I will need help on this ride. Using is not an option but not using will be a bitch at times. Helps to have friends.

And edromero, yeah, there was a lot more to it than the dipping but the fact that I hid something from her for so long hurt her deeply. I wasn't man enough to speak my truth and deal with this years and years ago. You can't keep up a lie like this forever. She nearly busted my many times and I lied like a fool to get out of it. So not only did I lose trust, I lost respect because I wouldn't own up. Lying was such a habit that it invaded other parts of our lives. It sucks but I'm doing an incredible amount of work at this time trying to finally grow up at 41. Lots of self-help reading, prayer, affermations, exercise, journaling, working with a guru-guy, etc. I'm not who I was 6 weeks ago by any stretch. Just had this one stupid fucking habit tagging along that needs the boot...

Offline bman50317

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Re: What's up from AfroMann
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2009, 09:05:00 AM »
Quote from: AfroMann
Been to day 7 twice already this month. The physical part for me is easy. The mental part is the bitch.
The mental games are the toughest my friend, but hang in there and push back against them. Use this site, read up, make friends, and you will have plenty of resources to make this your final quit. If you need anything, let me know.


Also, your name sounds familiar. Is this you.........Afroman?



If you need anything, let me know.
Time heals but I'm forever broken

Offline edromero

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Re: What's up from AfroMann
« Reply #2 on: March 20, 2009, 08:36:00 AM »
Quote from: AfroMann
Hey to everyone out there going through what I am. On day 5 at the moment. Been to day 7 twice already this month. The physical part for me is easy. The mental part is the bitch. My friend says that's the "animal mind" telling you that you can't be serious about quiting. You like dipping, don't you. Well, actually, FUCK NO, I do not like dipping.

Just read about others who hid it from their wives and got busted. That was me. I'm 41 and dipped on and off, mostly on, since boy scouts. My wife of 17 years didn't know until late 2008 and only cause my daughter found my cans of Skoal. Let me tell you guys something, don't lie to your wives unless you want to end up divorced. My wife and I are seperated at the moment and nothing has ever been worse for me. I'm not done fighting for the marriage but the truth is, damage has been done and trust has been lost. It's just not worth it! If I had told her before she would have been upset but she could have helped me get through this, now I'm on my own. Well, no, I have you guys. I will make it to 100 days and beyond this time.

I'll be signing in every day I can.

Peace,
AfroMann
shit, she left you over it? Sounds like it was the deception more than the dipping itself huh? i hope she comes back, especially when she sees how hard youre willing tom work to get her back. good luck.
I like my women like i like my beer: gone when i'm done

Offline AfroMann

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What's up from AfroMann
« on: March 19, 2009, 11:11:00 PM »
Hey to everyone out there going through what I am. On day 5 at the moment. Been to day 7 twice already this month. The physical part for me is easy. The mental part is the bitch. My friend says that's the "animal mind" telling you that you can't be serious about quiting. You like dipping, don't you. Well, actually, FUCK NO, I do not like dipping.

Just read about others who hid it from their wives and got busted. That was me. I'm 41 and dipped on and off, mostly on, since boy scouts. My wife of 17 years didn't know until late 2008 and only cause my daughter found my cans of Skoal. Let me tell you guys something, don't lie to your wives unless you want to end up divorced. My wife and I are seperated at the moment and nothing has ever been worse for me. I'm not done fighting for the marriage but the truth is, damage has been done and trust has been lost. It's just not worth it! If I had told her before she would have been upset but she could have helped me get through this, now I'm on my own. Well, no, I have you guys. I will make it to 100 days and beyond this time.

I'll be signing in every day I can.

Peace,
AfroMann