Late intro for BuchDaddy

[BuchDaddy]

Putting a copy of this here so I know where to find it when I need to read it again. Very powerful stuff!

Borrowing from Irish. Lest we never forget what got us here.

No Excuse To Cave - NONE!

I don't know Todd, other than what I've read in his intro. His story is inspiring. His story made me cry.

If I ever feel life has given me an excuse to cave, I'm going to come here and read this, again.

Whew where to begin, well brothers and sisters today should be a joyous day 7th floor with 2 trips around the sun to follow and not to be overshadowed by too many other events right. Well, what I am about to follow up with is a warning my way to pay it forward a way for me to find something positive out of what I have found out. A way to reinforce to those that think they are cured and that they may be able to try a dance with their mistress/Reaper... This is a message to the vets as well as newbies it's not over. This isn't written for sympathy or pity I knew that this was a possibility when I thought I was a tough guy with my lip packed full of death.

Friday 3-13-15 a day I will never forget, I had a colonoscopy and yep you guessed it CANCER located close to where small and large intestines come together... I was a bad ass I didn't need a spitter I gutted it this pseudo-badge of courage is probably the culprit.

Funny what goes through your head when you get that kind of news first initial shock...followed up with panic, fear then sadness. It finally really hit me Sunday a.m. I broke down the thoughts that I may not get to see my wife again, smell her hair, see her smile, hear her laugh, miss her sarcasm...not getting to see my son play sports, graduate and see him go through life not getting to be a Grandpa...Yep all those moments be shared with others and not me. I took a walk down memory lane yesterdayÂ…have I put enough away for my family, what have I left for a legacy, have I given more than I have taken, will I be remembered or just another UST statistic... All that shit goes through your head...I am sure that are a lot more emotions to follow.

Today I am up and going I have shit to do before I go for surgery. I have to use all my tools that I have acquired from KTC and apply them moving forward. THIS DOES NOT GIVE ME THE RIGHT OR EXCUSE TO CHEW! This isn't going to be an I, it will be a WE, brothers and sisters from KTC, friends and family taking this head on one day at a time. I am absolutely impressed with the men and women of KTC who have already started pumping out support....THANK YOU.

So if any of you still have friends dippin tell them this if you dont have what it takes to quit nicotine you are gonna be TOO big of a pussy for chemo. Dying is easy its the living that is hard got to dig deep everyday and there would be no way in hell I could do this on my own. If it werent for the support of my wife and family, the support i get daily from the members this site and the people I have in my corner locally. I would have been consumed by this cancer shit. I have already lived through two you only have 6 months left.

Well it appears that it has been awhile since I have put in an update. I had double pneumonia that landed me in the hospital for a week...then home health for a week giving me very strong antibiotics. After a week of that the nausea and pain were enough I woke up on a Monday morning and fired everyone. I called the VA and asked to be put on hospice. Hospice has been working with me to get me under control as far as pain and nausea go. I have been puking and dry heaving for days so finally last night they hooked me up to a morphine drip and a Tordol drip subQ. they have also discovered that I have chemo induced thrush from my mouth to my stomach so another obstacle to overcome.

I also carry a BRAF mutation with in the cancer war is like trying fight fires with gasoline. So I am on the hospice pony and just trying to ride whatever time I have left in relative comfort. So just trying to take it easy.

Once again just wanted to say thank you to everyone that has been on this ride with me, I also wanted to say if you text or email and I dont respond right away please dont take it personal there are days that just making it to tomorrow is the best I can do.
thanks
Trauma

[BuchDaddy]

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm of the mind set that it concerns me you took so long to write an intro. You're 85 drops into a 17 year bucket of addiction. Multiple failed attempts including trials and tribulations at KTC. One would think that if you're going to make sure this is a true and lasting quit, you would jump in 110% balls to the wall. Intros, involvement, posting on other intro pages, phone numbers, meet ups, ...the list goes on. Now, I don't know you and I'm making an assumption based off of a single intro post, but I truly hope that you have built a foundation in which your quit can grow and become impenetrable. Hopefully your late intro post is not reflective of how involved you are in your quit. For your sake, I hope I'm wrong. ...and I mean this in the most constructive and supportive way possible (catch my drift).

Quitting takes a full time commitment for me! Everyone is different but the more your involved the more your invested the better the odds are for you to stay ahead of the whore! Quit on! Proud of you.

My first week or so here someone told me that "you talk the talk - make sure you walk the walk". The Hall of Fame isn't a target, it is just a milestone on a much longer journey. Reach out to help others and stay quit for the long term. B)B

The 100 day mark (HOF) is only the first hurdle in this race, not the finish line. Stay vigilant.

[Stranger999]

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm of the mind set that it concerns me you took so long to write an intro. You're 85 drops into a 17 year bucket of addiction. Multiple failed attempts including trials and tribulations at KTC. One would think that if you're going to make sure this is a true and lasting quit, you would jump in 110% balls to the wall. Intros, involvement, posting on other intro pages, phone numbers, meet ups, ...the list goes on. Now, I don't know you and I'm making an assumption based off of a single intro post, but I truly hope that you have built a foundation in which your quit can grow and become impenetrable. Hopefully your late intro post is not reflective of how involved you are in your quit. For your sake, I hope I'm wrong. ...and I mean this in the most constructive and supportive way possible (catch my drift).

Quitting takes a full time commitment for me! Everyone is different but the more your involved the more your invested the better the odds are for you to stay ahead of the whore! Quit on! Proud of you.

My first week or so here someone told me that "you talk the talk - make sure you walk the walk". The Hall of Fame isn't a target, it is just a milestone on a much longer journey. Reach out to help others and stay quit for the long term. B)B

[pab1964]

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm of the mind set that it concerns me you took so long to write an intro. You're 85 drops into a 17 year bucket of addiction. Multiple failed attempts including trials and tribulations at KTC. One would think that if you're going to make sure this is a true and lasting quit, you would jump in 110% balls to the wall. Intros, involvement, posting on other intro pages, phone numbers, meet ups, ...the list goes on. Now, I don't know you and I'm making an assumption based off of a single intro post, but I truly hope that you have built a foundation in which your quit can grow and become impenetrable. Hopefully your late intro post is not reflective of how involved you are in your quit. For your sake, I hope I'm wrong. ...and I mean this in the most constructive and supportive way possible (catch my drift).

Quitting takes a full time commitment for me! Everyone is different but the more your involved the more your invested the better the odds are for you to stay ahead of the whore! Quit on! Proud of you.

[Steakbomb18]

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm of the mind set that it concerns me you took so long to write an intro. You're 85 drops into a 17 year bucket of addiction. Multiple failed attempts including trials and tribulations at KTC. One would think that if you're going to make sure this is a true and lasting quit, you would jump in 110% balls to the wall. Intros, involvement, posting on other intro pages, phone numbers, meet ups, ...the list goes on. Now, I don't know you and I'm making an assumption based off of a single intro post, but I truly hope that you have built a foundation in which your quit can grow and become impenetrable. Hopefully your late intro post is not reflective of how involved you are in your quit. For your sake, I hope I'm wrong. ...and I mean this in the most constructive and supportive way possible (catch my drift).

[KingNothing]

Awesome intro BD, and congrats on the 85 days. Keep pushing forward, it'll get even better.

[eyehatecope]

Nice intro. Proud to quit with you!

[Thumblewort]

Great intro man!

[BuchDaddy]

Hello fellow quitters! I am BuchDaddy and a member of the June 2016 group currently on day 85 as I write this. We started our HOF train today which spurred me to be reading other intros and HOF speeches. Then I came to the realization I had never posted an intro myself, so here goes.

I found KTC back in July 2015. July 8th actually, one month before my wedding day. I created a username and password but never joined a quit group or posted roll. I simply read some of information found on this site and figured no problem, I can do this. Well I only made it 11 days and I was right back at it. Yet another failed attempt. Fast forward to March 9th, 2016. I was ready to finally quit for myself (not for my wife or anyone else). I had been back to KTC and done quite a bit more reading and research on quitting and the KTC method. I flushed the remnants of that can of Copenhagen Long Cut and joined the June 2016 quit group. That was one of the best decisions I have ever made. Here we are 85 days later and feeling pretty good. Am I cured, NO. But I am quit for today and God willing I'll be back to make that promise again tomorrow.

BuchDaddy BIO:
Name: Dustin
Age: 34 (June 5th)
Years addicted: 17
Occupation: Manufacturing Engineer
Location: Willard, WI
Hobbies: Bow Hunting, baseball, fishing, shooting, reloading. and military history. 'usflag'
Best Part of Quit: Feeling better and better each day