Day 134 of this quit. Been a slave to the nic for about 8 years. Found this place about a month ago, been reading on here a lot. This quit is tough, but God gives us the resources in this life to help, and this place is one for me. I need some help from ya'll cause this quit is kickin my tail, and I refuse to go back to it after being free for this long and going through those rough days. ODAAT (How do I get started?)
My Story: I'm 23 years old and have been a slave to nic for about 8 years. I like to exercise, weight lift, and play rugby. I'm studying to be a physical education teacher in college and I love it. I have about 1 year left, well this summer and then my final year. The only way I've stayed quit this long is because the grace of God. 100% couldn't have made it this far without Him. I've always been religious, but never took it seriously. When I quit chewing I knew I couldn't go back, its not who God wanted me to be. The first couple weeks were actually the easiest believe it or not (I guess my brain didn't fully "understand" yet that it wasn't getting the nicotine it would usually get throughout the whole day.). When my brain caught up I was hit like a freight train. The demons were telling me "You can't make it through the semester of school without it" or "Why are you feeling so weird, you should go back to dipping" or "you'll never make it through this". I would be sweating in class, almost having panic attacks and having to leave school. I would be losing my mind everyday trying to figure out what was going on with me. I would have constant fear/anxiety, not being able to sleep right, feeling depressed, the works! The way I made it that 134 days is prayer, faith, support from friends and family (rarely) and reading the Word of God. I knew that I couldn't go back so I kept on pushing every day. Escaping this horrific prison has been the #1 absolute most difficult thing I have ever done in my life. Dip is what "got me through" things, and what "helped me cope" is what I would tell myself. As time went on, I would start to feel better some days and start feeling a bit normal again, but the nic B kept on swinging. Looking back, I am doing a lot better now, I just need to keep taking steps one day at a time and be patient with learning how to find joy, peace, love, and hope without being chained down and lied to by the nic demon. The last couple of weeks were good more than bad, but the bad days were 10 times worse than they usually are. That is when I knew I needed to reach out and get some help in this fight. It's amazing how big of a lie chewing is when you are set free from its grip. I chose my screen name Mr. Incredable because my freinds say I look like him (I dressed up as him for holloween last year and I don't think ya'll would have seen a difference). I look forward to fighting this with all of you guys. I look forward to walking through the fog together and seeing the light get brighter and brighter. I look forward to learning how to live without this chain on, and build friendships with you all. Thank you again for accepting me, I know ya'll will keep me strong and I hope I can do the same for you guys. I don't really have any questions about the site right now, some of the guys in the group already answered the one I had, so thank you! I'll just keep browsing the site and learning and posting role every morning when I wake up. How'ed ya'll come up with the group name? How many people are in our group? You guys all quit around the same time I did right? Thanks for welcoming me and making me feel accepted and supported, it means so much! Lets beat this nic demon together. If you have any more questions for me ask away, I will try to make my rounds with the group members asap!
