I'm done with this sh*t!

[Scowick65]

I am a ninja dipper on day 332 of choosing not to feed my addiction. You can count on me if you need any help. I am glad you are here. We create freedom 1 day at a time. Post roll every am and quit with me.

[dchogs]

great decision, chris.

a couple of things:

1. you've been down this quitting road before and it obviously didn't stick. you need to sit your ass down and KNOW why you caved on your past quits. those are issues that will come up again during this quit, and you need to be ready for them. it might be a painful look at your shortcomings, but that's better than sticking your head in the sand and caving again.

2. have a plan for what you're going to be doing differently this time. obviously, KTC will be a difference, but i strongly encourage you to get super involved here on the site. post, read, chat, all that shit. craves don't last long when you're on KTC. exchange phone numbers with quit brothers and vets... support other quit groups.... there are tons of options, and each one is a round in your quit magazine that you'll be able to unload on the nic bitch when she comes calling. actually write out what steps you're going to take to stay quit when a mega-crave hits.

3. you have to quit for yourself. it might seem very noble to quit for your kids or your wife or for your granddaddy who's dying of whatever. at the end of the day, the only thing that's going to keep you quit has to come from within you. external reasons will lose their meaning during a crave. hell, you've been dipping around your kids now. your reasons to quit HAVE to be selfish and not selfless.

4. close the door to nicotine. if you let the faintest possibility exist in your mind that it is something that maybe you'll be able to use occasionally down the road or that the next tragedy in your life will be better with dip or whatever, you'll be dipping again. you're not quitting, if the door is closed. you are quit. it's a state of mind, and in a mind-fuck event like quitting nicotine, that is important.

make sure you post roll. it's your promise not to use nicotine for the day. then all you have to do is keep your word until you go to sleep. it's simple, but not easy... else everyone could quit no problem. you're going to have to reach down, sack up, and get fucking tough to make it through. you can do it.

[hunter1188]

Hey Chris, just read your story kinda reminds me where i'm at with kids and wanting there dad to be around longer. I'm on day 2 now going pretty good. (almost had a little road rage on the way to work) but worked my way threw it. My wife has known that I dipped since the day we meet, but I managed to hide it from anyone that I didn't want to no about it. ie, teachers, bosses. Hell I work in law enforcement and made it through 2 different academies without being caught.

Just logged on here today so let me know how your doing, we can all help each other beat the s**t!!!

[ChewCrewRetiree]

Good to have you here Chris. Your motivation sounds perfect. I myself want to be a family man one day, and if I were to keep the can up, that would probably never end up being the case. Additionally, I myself have always hidden my dippin from everyone except for my closest friends who were also dippers. Recently I've come clean. Now, I receive daily support here at KTC in addition to all those who I've come clean to.

Each day, I wake and post roll and immediately feel like a bigger, better, newer guy. I know you have the quit in you as well, and I will gladly be by your side each and every day. You've made the right choice and you're at the absolute best place you could be in your quit.

Crew

[BallStateDeac]

Chris, welcome! I'm only on day 7 so I'll let others show you the ropes but I'm proud to quit with you today.

[whacko]

Welcome aboard!

For one thing don't think that hiding your addicdtion is something unique......I mean that in a good way! There are many former "ninja dippers" on this site. I am one of them. Hid my addiction from my family for a long time......in fact my wife and son still do not know that I was dipping for over 2 years. You made the right decision telling your wife......I stikll have not told mine for personal reasons......she is going through alot right now and it would be alot to handle if I told her I was a nicotene addict.

Anyway......the guys on here keep me quit with the support!

Click on the welcome center icon on the top left of the screen.........you'll need to know how to post roll call.......it is the backbone of our quit here!

1. wake up
2. post roll that you will be nic free for today
3. keep you word
4. repeat tomorrow

its that simple!

Proud to be quit with you today......i anm on day 83

[Chris231]

Hey guys  gals,

My name is Chris and I just wanted to introduce myself and say hi.

I decided on Saturday that it was time to be done with the can once and for all. So here I am on day 4 of my quit. I'll be 37 on Friday and I've been an on and off dipper for the better part of 15 years. I managed to "take a break" for a little over a year about 2 years ago, but unfortunately I folded at some point and have been a 1/2 a can per day ever since.

For more than a year I've managed to hide my dipping from my wife (don't ask me how I pulled that off). I broke down yesterday and told her that I had been doing it for a long time now and I had finally decided to be done with this shit. Needless to say she was disappointed that I had been deceiving her, but in the end she was happy that I told her and she is on my side to help this be the last quit I do. I need to do this for my kids if not for anyone else. I have a 2 year old and a 4 month old. They need their Dad around for a long time to come.

This quit is very different from the other few times I "tried" to quit. My gums are really sore and I've actually got a couple of little canker sores, which I never had when I was dipping or when I tried to quit before. I'm hoping that's normal and not a sign of other issues. My nose is runny and I almost feel like I've got flu symptoms.

I'm not having the cravings like I was expecting, but I have these moments of mini-depression, where I just get down for like an hour or so. I don't feel like talking to anyone or doing anything and then they just seem to pass. I never had those when I was detoxing on previous attempts.

So that's about it. Sorry for the long intro. I've ordered some Hooch just to have on hand for those times that I know I would probably be really wanting a dip...Golf, Softball night, driving, etc. I'm officially done with dip for good and while I can't say I won't miss it, I'm looking forward to not having to rely on nicotine to get me through the day.

- Chris