Hello. My name is Egan and I'm addicted to chewing tobacco. I started early, when I was 14. My buddy Fred stole a few wintergreen pouches from his dad, and he, johnny, eli and I thought we were so fucking cool walking around the track during recess, with those packets of death in our mouth.
Twenty four years later and I'm still doing it. Except now I hide in the bathroom at work, or take inexplicable trips to the store to indulge in my habit for a few minutes.
I've quit before. Many times in fact. I quit this time last year, and it lasted all the way till Christmas. But on the 17 hour drive home alone, I cracked. Actually, that's BS. I cracked way before that. I was thinking about it in the back of my mind months in advance. "I'll be all alone, it's a super long drive, maybe I'll just grab one can." Nine months later and here we are. Back to a can a day.
I have two boys. Torin is 2 1/2. His baby brother Rhys is 6 weeks old. Who the fuck do I think I am? How dare I jeopardize their future!? If I die, what kind of life will they have. If I lose half my face, what will that do to them!?
This ends today. I will never, ever, chew again. I clearly can't do it alone. So I pray to God your support with guide me though. And in return I pledge my support to you.