... let them know that my habit is more important to me than they are. You don't realize how selfish you are with this habit till ... Here's to day 1 of me putting myself and my family before this habit that has been running my life.
Welcome.
You don't have a nicotine habit, you have an addiction. The difference is important.
A habit is a pattern of behavior. Some people bite their nails, or go through a certain routine in the morning as they get ready for the day, or drive a certain route to work, when there are other routes that would work about as well. Those are habits. A person can change their habits or not. Other people may find them a little (or a lot) annoying, or not. If it does affect you or the ones you love negatively, a habit can usually be corrected with some simple and deliberate behavior changes.
Use of nicotine is a fucking addiction. An addiction, by definition, leads to negative consequences. The negative consequences become part of the addiction. (health impaired, money spent, relationships damaged).
You are removing nicotine from your body. Your brain and body will have an abrupt and significant reaction to the removal. From a physiological standpoint, the reaction is very real. Your body will scream for the drug. You will need to make behavior changes, and your brain will need to rewire itself.
You need to recognize this as a real and significant addiction. If you think of it as a mere habit, you will tend to underestimate the power of nicotine's hold on you, and the amount of effort on your part to reverse it.
Buckle up, and hold tight, because this is going to suck until it doesn't.
Post roll every day. Keep your promise. Refuse to cave. What you'll find on the other side of the misery is amazing.
