Sorry to hear of your loss, Dan. Dying from nic was a huge motivator for me... so addicted to something that is actively killing you is so pathetic, but we were all in that same spot. Quitting DOES suck. It's gonna be one of the worst things you go through. Many of us kept notes on just how sucky it is, and reading back through those notes helped us get through future cravings (because there are MANY future cravings). Don't make yourself endure the suck again, quit and stay quit. Post roll EDD, and share your digits with every damn member of your group. The more present you are on this site, the greater your sense of responsibility will be to stay nic-free. Exercise, a gallon of water a day, eat a lot of fiber, stock up on some sleep aids and natural calming supplements (lithium orotate and L-theanine worked great for me), and invest in some fake and/or seeds, licorice, gum, suckers, etc. Stay away from booze for a few months, and far away from "friends" who will dip in front of you. You can do it. Life without nic is totally worth the suck. Don't hesitate to reach out to any of us to talk through a craving. We're all here for you.
