I started this nasty habit back in 1993 and never really intended for it to take over my life like it did but 21 years later I have come to realize that addiction to snuff is real stuff. Over the years I have set many quit dates, birthdays, new years, the birth of all 3 of my daughters, but all came and went and each day ended the same, setting in the recliner telling my wife goodnight and her kissing me on top of the head because I had a dip in. Life has been no different for me than it has for any of the others on this site. There have been highs and lows and snuff was always there. Kind of like a best friend, yea snuff was my best friend as long as I played by it's rules. Which meant that I must never under no circumstances leave home without it. I was a slave to it, if it wasn't in my pocket or a new can or two in the truck I thought I would go insane. This habit has cost me roughly $23,000 dollars and God only knows how many years of my life, but on Oct 13, 2014 that all changed.
I was going to see a movie with my wife and oldest daughter and as I met her to ride in her car I realized I had forgot my snuff in my work car at school, yea I work in a school system which has meant hiding it during the day for the past 12 years. Anyway, I was so upset and we were late for the movie and if I had asked her to stop so I could buy a can I knew she would blow up, so I set there quietly on the way to the movie afterwards got back to my car and decided that enough was enough. Quitting had been on my mind for some time but just never took the leap of faith so as I was driving home I passed the store I stopped at everyday and just kept on driving. I thought lets see how bad this gets tonight, wow I had no idea that 24 hours with wolf cool wintergreen would be so nerve racking. The next morning I passed the store again and so now 18 days later I still have not stopped at the store.
It is not been easy but I am thankful that I have this site and the members of this group to keep me honest (One Day at a Time I QUIT).
I am clinging to 1 Corinthians 10:13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.
Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
We can't change the mistakes of the past but we can hopefully learn from them and not make them twice. I made a mistake with Hawkens wintergreen 21 years ago and I have regretted it many times. I have also thought that I loved it so much that I couldn't live without it. Now 18 days into this new life without it I realize the deception and addiction that has controlled my life for so long and with the help of Christ and this January group today I am quit.
