I've been off of chew for 14 days today! This may not sound like much, but it is the longest I have gone without nicotine in my system for 17 years. Once a while ago I quit for 3 weeks with the use of a nicotine patch and gum, but I don't count that anymore.
I quit because obviously I've always wanted to, but in actuality, it was a blood test that tested for nicotine. Failing that test meant that I would be paying a lot of money for a policy. So I just quit. Just like that, took my last dip, and said tomorrow is it. And it has been. The way that I did it was that I told myself that I only had to quit until I finished the blood test, then on the way home, I would grab a can and all will be right with the world. The whole first week that kept it alive for me. I literally dreamed about that dip! Then I had the blood taken, and drove home, and by the time I got there realized I hadn't even thought about stopping off for a can. This in itself is something that I have never experienced. Typically when I quit (for a day) the next morning I'm at the store pretending I need something else, and nic/crackhead takes over from there. This time has been different! So I set another goal, next week when my wife and kids are out of town for a few days, I have am stuck here working. I told myself I'd get just one can for that night. Not that I actually plan to, but it has seemed to help this far... BTW, the test came back negative for nicotine, and that made me so proud of myself, I figured there has to be another way than promising myself a dip at some point, so matter how successful it has been.
Now I keep telling myself, I've made it this far, and if I slip, whenever I quit again, I'll just have to go through this entire thing all over again. And that one dip I told myself I could have, would turn back into a can a day quick fast in a hurry.
I've never been this deep into a real quit, and it feels awesome, but that doesn't make it any easier. That and the fact that my entire mouth feels like I'm a burnt snake peeling skin from the inside out has helped a bit as well. The other day I woke up and wondered what the hell I ate that burned my entire mouth, then I realized I was just healing. I think at this point a dip would make me want to cry it would hurt so bad.
Last night I sat there thinking about how much I miss it, and then I remembered a few months ago I tried to quit (the time with the patches) and found this site, and I thought it was time to get serious about it, so here I am.
Here is a little about my quit/ reasons- if that's what we do here??
Age- 37
Poison of Choice- Used to be Cope longcut, until Grizzly 1900 came out and I got 3 cans for the price of 1 Cope.... that was dangerous!! I felt like fat kids with a 50% less sugar product "great, now I can have twice as much"!!
Amount- Roughly 3 cans every 2 days--- god thats disgusting!
Married, 2 kids- My wife loves that I have quit, and is willing to help me out however she needs to. Just making through the first two weeks is huge. I'm sure I've been a Grizzly (pardon the pun) to deal with. My kids are supportive as well. Whenever I get impatient with them they say "you're not mad at me Daddy, your mouth is mad at you for not dipping, but I'm proud of you, so you can yell at me if you want!"
Job- I run a Landscape Construction business, and am outdoors in the dirt all day... pretty much the worst job you can have to quit dipping. Luckily no one else on my crew dips, and are typically all over me about quitting, so I have support there as well.
How I started. As a machine-gunner in the Marines, we would have to stay up for hours on fire watch after hiking up and down mountains with full gear all day. One day a guy said, here have this, it'll keep you up. I had never even smoked a cigarette at that point in my life (20 years old) so I said sure, and the rest is history...
The difference. The difference is that this time, I truly have no intention of going back. I read a story the other night about a guy that was playing around on a ski trip and "accidentally" had some fall in his mouth... well, my situation is different in that I am the ONLY person I can hold accountable! I am the only one I know that dips, so having one is all on me. I have to go to the store, stand in line, consciously ask for it, pay for it, break it open, find a spitter, etc... so its all me, meaning the ol housewife excuse..." it slipped and fell in"... just won't work. (haha)
All that said. I still think about it a lot, not enough to weaken my resolve, but, it does stay pretty fresh on my mind. I just ordered some of that TeaZa, and so I'll have that next week. But aside from that here is what has worked so far
Seeds... I mean an insane amount of seeds.., jerky chew, salt and vinegar kettle chips have done the trick, not sure why. And when I am out, and feel like stopping by a gas station, I treat myself to something else, like food. I tell myself, "don't stop off and grab a can, and you can grab sub, or a burrito, whatever you feel like, and head home and eat it!" Not the healthiest technique, but I did read somewhere here- whatever you have to do to keep dip out of your mouth, right?
Problem is, I'm missing the actual taste and texture. There is that nic-head in there screaming at me saying... WTF is this shit??? WHERE IS MY GRIZZLY BITCH!!! Just have to keep trucking.
Anyway, I woke up this morning proud as hell, so I figured it would be a great time to introduce myself. Because I feel my mind slowly starting to go to the "I've gone this far, I can quit anytime I want, now that I've proved I can, so just a little won't hurt" phase, and I think I might need some assistance from some Bros. Thanks in advance for the help fellas.
Rza
