Intro to my QUIT

[Nomore1959]

Hey Paul, congrats on your HOF! Thank you for being such an inspirational leader in the August group.

You hit the ground running and have been a stud the whole way through. You've helped me personally and many others. Keep it up and I look forward to fighting on through to 200 and beyond!

Paul-san, my live chat bro,
Congrats on your HOF day.
Love this day for quitters, it was my favorite milestone.
Not 100 and done, its never done, it just gets better!
Hang on tight and enjoy the ride while you bring others along with you. Proud to quit with you today.

Congrats on the HOF, brother! Keep on layin it down.

congrats on the Hall! stick around, it keeps getting better.

[danojeno]

Hey Paul, congrats on your HOF! Thank you for being such an inspirational leader in the August group.

You hit the ground running and have been a stud the whole way through. You've helped me personally and many others. Keep it up and I look forward to fighting on through to 200 and beyond!

Paul-san, my live chat bro,
Congrats on your HOF day.
Love this day for quitters, it was my favorite milestone.
Not 100 and done, its never done, it just gets better!
Hang on tight and enjoy the ride while you bring others along with you. Proud to quit with you today.

Congrats on the HOF, brother! Keep on layin it down.

[ChickDip]

Hey Paul, congrats on your HOF! Thank you for being such an inspirational leader in the August group.

You hit the ground running and have been a stud the whole way through. You've helped me personally and many others. Keep it up and I look forward to fighting on through to 200 and beyond!

Paul-san, my live chat bro,
Congrats on your HOF day.
Love this day for quitters, it was my favorite milestone.
Not 100 and done, its never done, it just gets better!
Hang on tight and enjoy the ride while you bring others along with you. Proud to quit with you today.

[pky1520]

Hey Paul, congrats on your HOF! Thank you for being such an inspirational leader in the August group.

You hit the ground running and have been a stud the whole way through. You've helped me personally and many others. Keep it up and I look forward to fighting on through to 200 and beyond!

[pky1520]

So, Day 49. Wow. Nothing that others haven't stated before but who'd thought I could ever survive this long without chewing. My want to quit for myself is strong and the brother/sisterhood I so enjoy here is a big reason that I have been successful thus far into my quit. Engaged daily within my group with the Spreadsheet of Accountability, engaged in topics/chat/groupme, and have shared digits with Aug quits bro's and vets. Staying strong.

With all that, the daily experience of craving is still there but so lessened to nothing much more than just a fleeting thought of going through the motions of taking a chew. The moments are real but pass very quickly. Occasionally I'll find myself moving my tongue around my mouth like I'm a packing in a chew. It's a subconscious thing of a thirty plus year chewer, but a trip nonetheless.

I have experienced dip dreams a couple of times in the past fifty days or so I thought. The couple of times that I had dreams they were quick and short and about me packing a can and taking a quick dip and that was pretty much it. I'd wake up thankful that it was just a dream and get on with posting roll. That was until this morning right before I awoke. This was a dream that seemed to last a while and was surely more involved. I was at work where chewing was not allowed. The dream detailed the actions of me actually sneaking the chew into the workplace. The dream progressed into me sneaking into and hiding in a bathroom stall to take a dip and while I was in the process a guy walks in, opens the door and busts me taking the dip. Odd that the snuff was a white color like it was some sort of poison or something. Strange. So, I packed the dip in while the guy saw me and motioned that he was making a mental note to write down this infraction and report it. In the closing scene of the dream, I immediate went to the sink in the bathroom and rinsed the chew I had just taken out and watched it go down the drain.

Then I awoke. Again thankful that I hadn't chewed and lied to myself and my quit brothers here in KTC. But wow, so real, so detailed, and frightening. As freaky as the dream was, its another experience that strengthens my will to be quit. Hope it helps others here too.

Thankful to have the ability to capture these experiences into a record like this to fend off ever using nicotine again.

Proud to be quit with all here at KTC.

Those dreams are messed up. I went weeks without one and then in the last week I've had 3. Last night in a dream I bought 2 cans, tossed in a dip and immediately spit it out and threw away the cans. I panicked and was thinking "this can't count as a cave, I spit it immediately!" But then I actually started to feel the suck restarting.

We get to a point where we think we're in the clear, but stuff like that is there as a reminder.

[paul-san]

So, Day 49. Wow. Nothing that others haven't stated before but who'd thought I could ever survive this long without chewing. My want to quit for myself is strong and the brother/sisterhood I so enjoy here is a big reason that I have been successful thus far into my quit. Engaged daily within my group with the Spreadsheet of Accountability, engaged in topics/chat/groupme, and have shared digits with Aug quits bro's and vets. Staying strong.

With all that, the daily experience of craving is still there but so lessened to nothing much more than just a fleeting thought of going through the motions of taking a chew. The moments are real but pass very quickly. Occasionally I'll find myself moving my tongue around my mouth like I'm a packing in a chew. It's a subconscious thing of a thirty plus year chewer, but a trip nonetheless.

I have experienced dip dreams a couple of times in the past fifty days or so I thought. The couple of times that I had dreams they were quick and short and about me packing a can and taking a quick dip and that was pretty much it. I'd wake up thankful that it was just a dream and get on with posting roll. That was until this morning right before I awoke. This was a dream that seemed to last a while and was surely more involved. I was at work where chewing was not allowed. The dream detailed the actions of me actually sneaking the chew into the workplace. The dream progressed into me sneaking into and hiding in a bathroom stall to take a dip and while I was in the process a guy walks in, opens the door and busts me taking the dip. Odd that the snuff was a white color like it was some sort of poison or something. Strange. So, I packed the dip in while the guy saw me and motioned that he was making a mental note to write down this infraction and report it. In the closing scene of the dream, I immediate went to the sink in the bathroom and rinsed the chew I had just taken out and watched it go down the drain.

Then I awoke. Again thankful that I hadn't chewed and lied to myself and my quit brothers here in KTC. But wow, so real, so detailed, and frightening. As freaky as the dream was, its another experience that strengthens my will to be quit. Hope it helps others here too.

Thankful to have the ability to capture these experiences into a record like this to fend off ever using nicotine again.

Proud to be quit with all here at KTC.

[pky1520]

Blasted through the month quit milestone last week. Its hard to believe that I have been quit for over a month. Wow, such a cool feeling. This week was another series of tests for me as we were on a road trip across Europe doing some sightseeing. There were many very subtle triggers that I faced, successfully. Such as those moments when you are gearing up for the next long section of driving, or when your starting to get a bit drowsy, or when driving conditions get a bit challenging with weather, traffic, etc. When I felt the nicotine ping, I thought back to my promise with posting roll and easily put the crave back into its place. Thank you all here for that!

It was very important for me to post roll while on this trip. I successfully posted roll EDD from the back woods of the Czech Rep, Slovakia, Austria, Switzerland, and France. As I mentioned above, it was good that I had posted roll as I was tested everyday with craves and had that promise to help fight off the crave.

The moments of anxiety that I mentioned on my last update continue to some degree. I was anxious a few times while driving last week. I noticed it the most while driving through long tunnels and was feeling claustrophobic. Noticed it with heights as well a couple of times. Something else I'll keep an eye on.

As I reflect, I feel good that I now have another set of quit tools as I have faced another set of triggers and haven't used tobacco. Quit is getting stronger all the time.

Thanks to all in my Aug quit group and a big thanks to the vets that are supporting my quit. This place rocks thanks to all of you!!

Nice work Paul! Glad you were able to post roll without having to send a $300 text from Europe to the states!
Sounds like a great trip, and you're doing what you need to stay on top of your craves/ triggers. Keep it up man, love having you in August!

[paul-san]

Blasted through the month quit milestone last week. Its hard to believe that I have been quit for over a month. Wow, such a cool feeling. This week was another series of tests for me as we were on a road trip across Europe doing some sightseeing. There were many very subtle triggers that I faced, successfully. Such as those moments when you are gearing up for the next long section of driving, or when your starting to get a bit drowsy, or when driving conditions get a bit challenging with weather, traffic, etc. When I felt the nicotine ping, I thought back to my promise with posting roll and easily put the crave back into its place. Thank you all here for that!

It was very important for me to post roll while on this trip. I successfully posted roll EDD from the back woods of the Czech Rep, Slovakia, Austria, Switzerland, and France. As I mentioned above, it was good that I had posted roll as I was tested everyday with craves and had that promise to help fight off the crave.

The moments of anxiety that I mentioned on my last update continue to some degree. I was anxious a few times while driving last week. I noticed it the most while driving through long tunnels and was feeling claustrophobic. Noticed it with heights as well a couple of times. Something else I'll keep an eye on.

As I reflect, I feel good that I now have another set of quit tools as I have faced another set of triggers and haven't used tobacco. Quit is getting stronger all the time.

Thanks to all in my Aug quit group and a big thanks to the vets that are supporting my quit. This place rocks thanks to all of you!!

[FISHFLORIDA]

Three full weeks into the rest of my life. Without chewing and it feels great. So, well past the physical withdrawal for the most part. The bulk of that was done in the first week. I say bulk as I do have an occasional moment of fog. These foggy moments are further between one another and don't usually last for long, seems like five to ten minutes at a time is all they last now. Past the first three days I was actually sleeping pretty good but this past week I've had a few rough nights with crashing pretty early but only sleeping for a few hours at a time. I cliff hard into a pretty deep sleep but will come out of that to awake within two to three hours. From that point on its difficult to sleep through the rest of the night. Seems I am then drifting off for another hour or two at a time. Something I'll keep an eye on and report back.

The jaw, cheek, and tongue soreness I had experienced for the first two weeks seems to have subsided completely. It's been four days or so since I have had any discomfort with my mouth, jaw, cheek, etc. A good news story and something else I'll watch closely.

That's the physical, the mental fight has kicked up another notch. I've found myself discover additional triggers this week as the weather turns warmer here in Holland. Cargo shorts, checking that side pocket for my can every time I turn around. Being around boats and the water. I guess just generally being outside more, walking, cycling. Working on creating new habits and associations that don't include chew. I've had a few craves this past week that were probably the most intense that I've had since I quit. The instance I feel the crave start, I usually jump on here and read up on introductions or the latest going on in a group. So far so good with that working to redirect my attention away from the crave. That, and a lot of licorice.

I have to say that I have also experienced a few episodes of anxiety here in the past week. Pretty sure one episode was triggered by not having a can around. This is definitely a strong residual play on needing that old safety blanket around as it was that way for thirty years. I used to get a little uncomfortable if I was getting a little too low. This anxiety doesn't last long but it is an odd feeling that has to be worked through usually by thinking through the moment and/or getting busy with something else. Working on rewiring the brain on this one.

Regarding the anxiety and my quit in general, it helps me to be engaged here. Spending more time on Live Chat and using Groupme as well. Great place to meet vet and new quitters and engage in real time chat. I have gotten help there and been able to help some newbies out as well. I've offered my digits out, and have a bunch of digits in my phone from fellow quit team members and also a few vets. I continue to pour through introductions and am picking out little gems that'll work for me to help with my quit.

The support of my fellow Aug quitters is amazing along with the experience and support that the vets bring to the table. So happy to be here and three weeks into a pretty strong quit.

As we say, more to follow! See you at roll, one day at a time!

Paul-San,
Man, it is great to read that. I am just a few days behind you and I was nodding my head the whole time reading your post. Yes yes yes!! My mouth just stopped hurting a couple of days ago. I still slap my cargo shorts (right pocket) looking for that little round whore. Keep up the great work. You were the first person to reach out to me when I did an intro and I won't forget that. odaat.
I quit with you
FF

[paul-san]

Three full weeks into the rest of my life. Without chewing and it feels great. So, well past the physical withdrawal for the most part. The bulk of that was done in the first week. I say bulk as I do have an occasional moment of fog. These foggy moments are further between one another and don't usually last for long, seems like five to ten minutes at a time is all they last now. Past the first three days I was actually sleeping pretty good but this past week I've had a few rough nights with crashing pretty early but only sleeping for a few hours at a time. I cliff hard into a pretty deep sleep but will come out of that to awake within two to three hours. From that point on its difficult to sleep through the rest of the night. Seems I am then drifting off for another hour or two at a time. Something I'll keep an eye on and report back.

The jaw, cheek, and tongue soreness I had experienced for the first two weeks seems to have subsided completely. It's been four days or so since I have had any discomfort with my mouth, jaw, cheek, etc. A good news story and something else I'll watch closely.

That's the physical, the mental fight has kicked up another notch. I've found myself discover additional triggers this week as the weather turns warmer here in Holland. Cargo shorts, checking that side pocket for my can every time I turn around. Being around boats and the water. I guess just generally being outside more, walking, cycling. Working on creating new habits and associations that don't include chew. I've had a few craves this past week that were probably the most intense that I've had since I quit. The instance I feel the crave start, I usually jump on here and read up on introductions or the latest going on in a group. So far so good with that working to redirect my attention away from the crave. That, and a lot of licorice.

I have to say that I have also experienced a few episodes of anxiety here in the past week. Pretty sure one episode was triggered by not having a can around. This is definitely a strong residual play on needing that old safety blanket around as it was that way for thirty years. I used to get a little uncomfortable if I was getting a little too low. This anxiety doesn't last long but it is an odd feeling that has to be worked through usually by thinking through the moment and/or getting busy with something else. Working on rewiring the brain on this one.

Regarding the anxiety and my quit in general, it helps me to be engaged here. Spending more time on Live Chat and using Groupme as well. Great place to meet vet and new quitters and engage in real time chat. I have gotten help there and been able to help some newbies out as well. I've offered my digits out, and have a bunch of digits in my phone from fellow quit team members and also a few vets. I continue to pour through introductions and am picking out little gems that'll work for me to help with my quit.

The support of my fellow Aug quitters is amazing along with the experience and support that the vets bring to the table. So happy to be here and three weeks into a pretty strong quit.

As we say, more to follow! See you at roll, one day at a time!

[ChickDip]

Yesterday was a day of test for me. I had a colleague visiting Holland and we met in Amsterdam to catch up and spend some time together. For those that haven't been, Amsterdam is everything you have heard about and more. It's wild, relaxed, and free and the people there are proud it's the way it is. A'dam's tolerance for free will is legendary and I am here to attest its alive and well. I met my buddy at a bar that I have grown fond of and visit just about every time I am in the city. Fate was in full play yesterday as I wasn't seated at the bar for more than twenty minutes when three gents from Norway sit down next to us. Guess what, they chew tobacco and proudly displayed their cans on the table that we shared. I've been here for just about a year and haven't seen anyone else chewing here. Unreal that three guys from Norway sniff me out on my first trip into the city and sit right beside me. Being kind folks, they of course offer some tobacco. Here, for me, is the really cool part. Although I was tripping out some with the situation and actually holding the can in my hand, it was such a cool feeling telling them how I had recently quit and was staying quit. I am absolutely resolute in my quit. I am comfortable in my quit. It is real and it is true.

I'll certainly take some of the credit for my actions but I have to say that KTC and all of you good people that I have met, chatted with, debated with, shared digits with, are the biggest reason I am where I am in my quit today. As I was sitting there talking to the Norwegians, you guys where right there in the front of my mind and really with me as I turned the bitch away. So, a thank you to the collective here as what we do here works for me, big time. I wasn't alone, I knew I had a phone full of numbers in my pocket that I could use at any minute, if needed.

So, another testament to logging in early and every day, posting roll, engaging in your quit and others quit and being better prepared to turn nicotine away with the strength of this team right beside ya.

So proud to be quit with all of you. One sweet day at a time.

Wow! That's a heck of a trigger! Bad ass way to stay quit. Have a great Memorial Day weekend!

Thanks Nomo! Many feel that you shouldn't face these triggers so early in a quit. I didn't go out yesterday in an effort to solely put myself in a position to be tempted. I was living my life. With that, I had prepared myself mentally by role-playing in my head how I would turn down offers of nicotine, cigs, stogies, chew, etc. Once in that vulnerable position, I immediately kicked into auto-pilot with the refusal to use and claim of being quit and nicotine free. This is a tool in my toolbox that I'll carry with me through my quit.

Powerful this brotherhood!

[paul-san]

Yesterday was a day of test for me. I had a colleague visiting Holland and we met in Amsterdam to catch up and spend some time together. For those that haven't been, Amsterdam is everything you have heard about and more. It's wild, relaxed, and free and the people there are proud it's the way it is. A'dam's tolerance for free will is legendary and I am here to attest its alive and well. I met my buddy at a bar that I have grown fond of and visit just about every time I am in the city. Fate was in full play yesterday as I wasn't seated at the bar for more than twenty minutes when three gents from Norway sit down next to us. Guess what, they chew tobacco and proudly displayed their cans on the table that we shared. I've been here for just about a year and haven't seen anyone else chewing here. Unreal that three guys from Norway sniff me out on my first trip into the city and sit right beside me. Being kind folks, they of course offer some tobacco. Here, for me, is the really cool part. Although I was tripping out some with the situation and actually holding the can in my hand, it was such a cool feeling telling them how I had recently quit and was staying quit. I am absolutely resolute in my quit. I am comfortable in my quit. It is real and it is true.

I'll certainly take some of the credit for my actions but I have to say that KTC and all of you good people that I have met, chatted with, debated with, shared digits with, are the biggest reason I am where I am in my quit today. As I was sitting there talking to the Norwegians, you guys where right there in the front of my mind and really with me as I turned the bitch away. So, a thank you to the collective here as what we do here works for me, big time. I wasn't alone, I knew I had a phone full of numbers in my pocket that I could use at any minute, if needed.

So, another testament to logging in early and every day, posting roll, engaging in your quit and others quit and being better prepared to turn nicotine away with the strength of this team right beside ya.

So proud to be quit with all of you. One sweet day at a time.

Wow! That's a heck of a trigger! Bad ass way to stay quit. Have a great Memorial Day weekend!

Thanks Nomo! Many feel that you shouldn't face these triggers so early in a quit. I didn't go out yesterday in an effort to solely put myself in a position to be tempted. I was living my life. With that, I had prepared myself mentally by role-playing in my head how I would turn down offers of nicotine, cigs, stogies, chew, etc. Once in that vulnerable position, I immediately kicked into auto-pilot with the refusal to use and claim of being quit and nicotine free. This is a tool in my toolbox that I'll carry with me through my quit.

[Nomore1959]

Yesterday was a day of test for me. I had a colleague visiting Holland and we met in Amsterdam to catch up and spend some time together. For those that haven't been, Amsterdam is everything you have heard about and more. It's wild, relaxed, and free and the people there are proud it's the way it is. A'dam's tolerance for free will is legendary and I am here to attest its alive and well. I met my buddy at a bar that I have grown fond of and visit just about every time I am in the city. Fate was in full play yesterday as I wasn't seated at the bar for more than twenty minutes when three gents from Norway sit down next to us. Guess what, they chew tobacco and proudly displayed their cans on the table that we shared. I've been here for just about a year and haven't seen anyone else chewing here. Unreal that three guys from Norway sniff me out on my first trip into the city and sit right beside me. Being kind folks, they of course offer some tobacco. Here, for me, is the really cool part. Although I was tripping out some with the situation and actually holding the can in my hand, it was such a cool feeling telling them how I had recently quit and was staying quit. I am absolutely resolute in my quit. I am comfortable in my quit. It is real and it is true.

I'll certainly take some of the credit for my actions but I have to say that KTC and all of you good people that I have met, chatted with, debated with, shared digits with, are the biggest reason I am where I am in my quit today. As I was sitting there talking to the Norwegians, you guys where right there in the front of my mind and really with me as I turned the bitch away. So, a thank you to the collective here as what we do here works for me, big time. I wasn't alone, I knew I had a phone full of numbers in my pocket that I could use at any minute, if needed.

So, another testament to logging in early and every day, posting roll, engaging in your quit and others quit and being better prepared to turn nicotine away with the strength of this team right beside ya.

So proud to be quit with all of you. One sweet day at a time.

Wow! That's a heck of a trigger! Bad ass way to stay quit. Have a great Memorial Day weekend!

[paul-san]

Yesterday was a day of test for me. I had a colleague visiting Holland and we met in Amsterdam to catch up and spend some time together. For those that haven't been, Amsterdam is everything you have heard about and more. It's wild, relaxed, and free and the people there are proud it's the way it is. A'dam's tolerance for free will is legendary and I am here to attest its alive and well. I met my buddy at a bar that I have grown fond of and visit just about every time I am in the city. Fate was in full play yesterday as I wasn't seated at the bar for more than twenty minutes when three gents from Norway sit down next to us. Guess what, they chew tobacco and proudly displayed their cans on the table that we shared. I've been here for just about a year and haven't seen anyone else chewing here. Unreal that three guys from Norway sniff me out on my first trip into the city and sit right beside me. Being kind folks, they of course offer some tobacco. Here, for me, is the really cool part. Although I was tripping out some with the situation and actually holding the can in my hand, it was such a cool feeling telling them how I had recently quit and was staying quit. I am absolutely resolute in my quit. I am comfortable in my quit. It is real and it is true.

I'll certainly take some of the credit for my actions but I have to say that KTC and all of you good people that I have met, chatted with, debated with, shared digits with, are the biggest reason I am where I am in my quit today. As I was sitting there talking to the Norwegians, you guys where right there in the front of my mind and really with me as I turned the bitch away. So, a thank you to the collective here as what we do here works for me, big time. I wasn't alone, I knew I had a phone full of numbers in my pocket that I could use at any minute, if needed.

So, another testament to logging in early and every day, posting roll, engaging in your quit and others quit and being better prepared to turn nicotine away with the strength of this team right beside ya.

So proud to be quit with all of you. One sweet day at a time.

[pky1520]

Great update Paul! These early milestones are huge for us - 1 day, 1 week, 10 days, 2 weeks, etc. The most important is finishing today, but you should be proud of what you've accomplished so far.

From this point on, it's all about staying strong mentally. After 10 days the worst is over physically, but your mind will play tricks on you. It will try to convince you that since you've made it so far, you have control and can manage having one chew, or one every now and then. Check out Zoe's Dad's roll post from this morning - I know I've definitely had those thoughts.

The other thing that can catch you is fatigue. "It's been X weeks why am I still feeling like this?" I've got that going on at day 25. So stay vigilant.

But you're doing great, keep showing up and taking full advatanve of this place. Sometimes there's nothing better to fend off a crave than a massive KTC brain dump.
Glad to have you with us in August!