Mthomastherapy

[SirDerek]

Day 506

Addiction woes.  You know, I once was really hyper about getting rid of all my addictions.  I quit nicotine and still am undefeated! Then I lost all the weight I gained from my quit...only to gain it back.  I would attempt to quit other things and had a couple relapses but for the most part, other vices simply weren't appealing to me anymore.

Quitting nicotine...I all the sudden desired to become a better person.  Now the question is "What makes a person better?" I have quit or just lost interest in other vices but now what? 

I'm worried that I have just become a boring person or I am bored.   

Am I happier for quitting Nicotine.  Hell yes I am!  I made great friends and finally felt the power over vice and tasted what winning was like again.

Just a part of the whole process of recovery.  If I live longer for quitting, what am I living for?  What is my purpose?  Not sure I like being bored or too serious about my life. 

Just putting this in my journal so that I can answer this thought when the answer comes. 

Still quitting even though I am as interesting as a rock right now.    'crackup'

Oh man, I always like ROCKS SFW

'crackup'

[srans]

Day 506

Addiction woes. You know, I once was really hyper about getting rid of all my addictions. I quit nicotine and still am undefeated! Then I lost all the weight I gained from my quit...only to gain it back. I would attempt to quit other things and had a couple relapses but for the most part, other vices simply weren't appealing to me anymore.

Quitting nicotine...I all the sudden desired to become a better person. Now the question is "What makes a person better?" I have quit or just lost interest in other vices but now what?

I'm worried that I have just become a boring person or I am bored.

Am I happier for quitting Nicotine. Hell yes I am! I made great friends and finally felt the power over vice and tasted what winning was like again.

Just a part of the whole process of recovery. If I live longer for quitting, what am I living for? What is my purpose? Not sure I like being bored or too serious about my life.

Just putting this in my journal so that I can answer this thought when the answer comes.

Still quitting even though I am as interesting as a rock right now. 'crackup'

I can relate to this so much. Love this post bro. Glad to be quit with you.

[Mthomas3824]

Day 506

Addiction woes. You know, I once was really hyper about getting rid of all my addictions. I quit nicotine and still am undefeated! Then I lost all the weight I gained from my quit...only to gain it back. I would attempt to quit other things and had a couple relapses but for the most part, other vices simply weren't appealing to me anymore.

Quitting nicotine...I all the sudden desired to become a better person. Now the question is "What makes a person better?" I have quit or just lost interest in other vices but now what?

I'm worried that I have just become a boring person or I am bored.

Am I happier for quitting Nicotine. Hell yes I am! I made great friends and finally felt the power over vice and tasted what winning was like again.

Just a part of the whole process of recovery. If I live longer for quitting, what am I living for? What is my purpose? Not sure I like being bored or too serious about my life.

Just putting this in my journal so that I can answer this thought when the answer comes.

Still quitting even though I am as interesting as a rock right now. 'crackup'

[Scowick65]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football.  My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense.  Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode. 

Why?  They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why?  For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose. 

Defense is needed and good with nicotine.  However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch.  I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time.  I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!)  

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being.  Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose"  Defend your quit with passion!  Prevent?  Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

True that !!!

Own it or be owned.

x2

46 defense on the bitch all day long, no matter the time, situation, or score! Congrats MT on the half comma!

:wub:

well done Mthomas, keep kicking ass and writing poetry, your quit has inspired me since I stumbled upon it, God speed to your sis and family

Great job brother!

Good luck to you and yours I always pray for the best for those who have gone into this battle with me!

Your quit and resolve has strengthened mine!

perfect

[Grizzly25]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football.  My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense.  Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode. 

Why?  They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why?  For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose. 

Defense is needed and good with nicotine.  However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch.  I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time.  I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!)  

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being.  Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose"  Defend your quit with passion!  Prevent?  Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

True that !!!

Own it or be owned.

x2

46 defense on the bitch all day long, no matter the time, situation, or score! Congrats MT on the half comma!

:wub:

well done Mthomas, keep kicking ass and writing poetry, your quit has inspired me since I stumbled upon it, God speed to your sis and family

Great job brother!

Good luck to you and yours I always pray for the best for those who have gone into this battle with me!

Your quit and resolve has strengthened mine!

[Its_Got2Happen]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football.  My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense.  Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode. 

Why?  They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why?  For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose. 

Defense is needed and good with nicotine.  However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch.  I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time.  I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!)  

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being.  Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose"  Defend your quit with passion!  Prevent?  Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

True that !!!

Own it or be owned.

x2

46 defense on the bitch all day long, no matter the time, situation, or score! Congrats MT on the half comma!

:wub:

well done Mthomas, keep kicking ass and writing poetry, your quit has inspired me since I stumbled upon it, God speed to your sis and family

[Mthomas3824]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football.  My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense.  Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode. 

Why?  They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why?  For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose. 

Defense is needed and good with nicotine.  However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch.  I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time.  I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!)  

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being.  Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose"  Defend your quit with passion!  Prevent?  Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

True that !!!

Own it or be owned.

x2

46 defense on the bitch all day long, no matter the time, situation, or score! Congrats MT on the half comma!

:wub:

[eric71]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football.  My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense.  Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode. 

Why?  They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why?  For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose. 

Defense is needed and good with nicotine.  However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch.  I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time.  I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!)  

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being.  Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose"  Defend your quit with passion!  Prevent?  Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

True that !!!

Own it or be owned.

x2

46 defense on the bitch all day long, no matter the time, situation, or score! Congrats MT on the half comma!

[traumagnet]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football.  My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense.  Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode. 

Why?  They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why?  For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose. 

Defense is needed and good with nicotine.  However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch.  I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time.  I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!) 

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being.  Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose"  Defend your quit with passion!  Prevent?  Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

True that !!!

Own it or be owned.

x2

[cbird65]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football. My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense. Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode.

Why? They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why? For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose.

Defense is needed and good with nicotine. However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch. I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time. I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!)

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being. Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose" Defend your quit with passion! Prevent? Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

True that !!!

Own it or be owned.

[Mthomas3824]

500 Days Today

I don't understand "prevent defense" in football. My team plays a great game with bitz and energy on defense. Then when they are up deep in the 4 quarter and still can lose the game; they go into "safe and soft" mode.

Why? They were playing brilliantly and then changed it because why? For most the game, they played to win, then they switch and play not to lose.

Defense is needed and good with nicotine. However, I don't play "prevent defense" with the nic bitch. I never, ever want to give up one yard to that bitch. (No matter the score at the time. I want her dead and if she is on her feet facing me, I go bat shit crazy and knock her out!)

I only suggest to you that nicotine is your enemy; a killer, liar and a subtle destructor of your spirit and physical well being. Hopefully, most the time you are on offense and scoring points but if you are on defense, don't play "not to lose" Defend your quit with passion! Prevent? Trust your team and knock the bitch down and take your ball back.

[eric71]

Day 470

I have spent a lot of time on the site because I feel a need to stay close for a bit.� I am an emotional wreck and my funk isn't induced by my battle with nicotine, (that has been a piece of cake)� It has been my feeling like nicotine, alcohol, prescription drugs, illegal drugs "Addiction" is just taking over and winning.�

My sensitivity to failure is because I feel like I can't control your quit which then becomes inner self discovery that I can't control mine????��

I see people here every damn day quitting and staying in the fight.� Then seeing someone surrender wondering why they didn't stay with the plan.� Seeing things for what they are.� You can only offer help and what you can give may be rejected but you offer it anyway.� Call out the addicted mind bullshit then move on to help the true and humble addict that can't do this alone but is willing to do anything to quit.��

Suddenly victories are shared.� HOF, One years, 500 days, a thousand and come back cavers who return (clean out the wound and follow the plan) with a better understanding.�

Then I feel excited...this is great, I needed to see and feel that victory!� This is a great stuff.� Today, I think, "I'm lucky to be an addict."� Did I just say that?� Yeah and I think I truly mean it.�

In Cmark's words.� Religious people are afraid to go to hell.� Spiritual people have already been there and chose not to go back.� My addiction opens my eyes to humility and faith.� I don't know if I would understand those words if I didn't know the exact opposite feeling.��

Now I take a deep breath knowing that my beautiful sister may not live for long because of her addictions.� I love my little sister and wish she would get better but I can't convince her of anything right now.

In all this, I feel blessed.� I am calm in what others would think is turmoil but life is good.�

Are we spirits having a human experience or humans having a spiritual experience?�

Today this is what my brain is like.� Mellow but unique. Felling alone, but at peace and even a desert is beautiful is beautiful and tranquil to reflect on freedom.��

� � Click for a moment of reflection

You are an empathetic individual who is getting healthier and stronger daily. Sometimes, that just hurts.

Today, I'll abide with you.

Sometimes being able to hold your head up and be calm in the midst of turmoil is the best example of strength. Well done sir!

Thank you.

X 2.... ^^^^^^^

If you need anything Mark, you've have my digits and are in my thoughts

[srans]

Day 470

I have spent a lot of time on the site because I feel a need to stay close for a bit.  I am an emotional wreck and my funk isn't induced by my battle with nicotine, (that has been a piece of cake)  It has been my feeling like nicotine, alcohol, prescription drugs, illegal drugs "Addiction" is just taking over and winning. 

My sensitivity to failure is because I feel like I can't control your quit which then becomes inner self discovery that I can't control mine????  

I see people here every damn day quitting and staying in the fight.  Then seeing someone surrender wondering why they didn't stay with the plan.  Seeing things for what they are.  You can only offer help and what you can give may be rejected but you offer it anyway.  Call out the addicted mind bullshit then move on to help the true and humble addict that can't do this alone but is willing to do anything to quit.  

Suddenly victories are shared.  HOF, One years, 500 days, a thousand and come back cavers who return (clean out the wound and follow the plan) with a better understanding. 

Then I feel excited...this is great, I needed to see and feel that victory!  This is a great stuff.  Today, I think, "I'm lucky to be an addict."  Did I just say that?  Yeah and I think I truly mean it. 

In Cmark's words.  Religious people are afraid to go to hell.  Spiritual people have already been there and chose not to go back.  My addiction opens my eyes to humility and faith.  I don't know if I would understand those words if I didn't know the exact opposite feeling.  

Now I take a deep breath knowing that my beautiful sister may not live for long because of her addictions.  I love my little sister and wish she would get better but I can't convince her of anything right now.

In all this, I feel blessed.  I am calm in what others would think is turmoil but life is good. 

Are we spirits having a human experience or humans having a spiritual experience? 

Today this is what my brain is like.  Mellow but unique. Felling alone, but at peace and even a desert is beautiful is beautiful and tranquil to reflect on freedom.  

    Click for a moment of reflection

You are an empathetic individual who is getting healthier and stronger daily. Sometimes, that just hurts.

Today, I'll abide with you.

Sometimes being able to hold your head up and be calm in the midst of turmoil is the best example of strength. Well done sir!

Thank you.

X 2.... ^^^^^^^

[Mthomas3824]

Day 470

I have spent a lot of time on the site because I feel a need to stay close for a bit.  I am an emotional wreck and my funk isn't induced by my battle with nicotine, (that has been a piece of cake)  It has been my feeling like nicotine, alcohol, prescription drugs, illegal drugs "Addiction" is just taking over and winning. 

My sensitivity to failure is because I feel like I can't control your quit which then becomes inner self discovery that I can't control mine????  

I see people here every damn day quitting and staying in the fight.  Then seeing someone surrender wondering why they didn't stay with the plan.  Seeing things for what they are.  You can only offer help and what you can give may be rejected but you offer it anyway.  Call out the addicted mind bullshit then move on to help the true and humble addict that can't do this alone but is willing to do anything to quit.  

Suddenly victories are shared.  HOF, One years, 500 days, a thousand and come back cavers who return (clean out the wound and follow the plan) with a better understanding. 

Then I feel excited...this is great, I needed to see and feel that victory!  This is a great stuff.  Today, I think, "I'm lucky to be an addict."  Did I just say that?  Yeah and I think I truly mean it. 

In Cmark's words.  Religious people are afraid to go to hell.  Spiritual people have already been there and chose not to go back.  My addiction opens my eyes to humility and faith.  I don't know if I would understand those words if I didn't know the exact opposite feeling.  

Now I take a deep breath knowing that my beautiful sister may not live for long because of her addictions.  I love my little sister and wish she would get better but I can't convince her of anything right now.

In all this, I feel blessed.  I am calm in what others would think is turmoil but life is good. 

Are we spirits having a human experience or humans having a spiritual experience? 

Today this is what my brain is like.  Mellow but unique. Felling alone, but at peace and even a desert is beautiful is beautiful and tranquil to reflect on freedom.  

    Click for a moment of reflection

You are an empathetic individual who is getting healthier and stronger daily. Sometimes, that just hurts.

Today, I'll abide with you.

Sometimes being able to hold your head up and be calm in the midst of turmoil is the best example of strength. Well done sir!

Thank you.

[jake frawley]

Day 470

I have spent a lot of time on the site because I feel a need to stay close for a bit.  I am an emotional wreck and my funk isn't induced by my battle with nicotine, (that has been a piece of cake)  It has been my feeling like nicotine, alcohol, prescription drugs, illegal drugs "Addiction" is just taking over and winning. 

My sensitivity to failure is because I feel like I can't control your quit which then becomes inner self discovery that I can't control mine???? 

I see people here every damn day quitting and staying in the fight.  Then seeing someone surrender wondering why they didn't stay with the plan.  Seeing things for what they are.  You can only offer help and what you can give may be rejected but you offer it anyway.  Call out the addicted mind bullshit then move on to help the true and humble addict that can't do this alone but is willing to do anything to quit. 

Suddenly victories are shared.  HOF, One years, 500 days, a thousand and come back cavers who return (clean out the wound and follow the plan) with a better understanding. 

Then I feel excited...this is great, I needed to see and feel that victory!  This is a great stuff.  Today, I think, "I'm lucky to be an addict."  Did I just say that?  Yeah and I think I truly mean it. 

In Cmark's words.  Religious people are afraid to go to hell.  Spiritual people have already been there and chose not to go back.  My addiction opens my eyes to humility and faith.  I don't know if I would understand those words if I didn't know the exact opposite feeling. 

Now I take a deep breath knowing that my beautiful sister may not live for long because of her addictions.  I love my little sister and wish she would get better but I can't convince her of anything right now.

In all this, I feel blessed.  I am calm in what others would think is turmoil but life is good. 

Are we spirits having a human experience or humans having a spiritual experience? 

Today this is what my brain is like.  Mellow but unique. Felling alone, but at peace and even a desert is beautiful is beautiful and tranquil to reflect on freedom. 

    Click for a moment of reflection

You are an empathetic individual who is getting healthier and stronger daily. Sometimes, that just hurts.

Today, I'll abide with you.

Sometimes being able to hold your head up and be calm in the midst of turmoil is the best example of strength. Well done sir!