Koba

[koba]

Day 7 today! Great to be one week in. Still feeling a bit foggy, but a lot better than days 1-3; I'd say I'm currently at like 80% brainpower instead of 50%. The mood swings have been pretty crazy, but I'm actually feeling pretty good otherwise.

The core concept of "post every day, and focus on that day" is a really good one for me. One of the most intimidating parts of quitting is the notion that I am permanently rejecting a substance I have used to regulate my mood, alertness, etc. for nearly 8 years. In that sense, it can be easy to feel like I am giving up some measure of control over my life. But in reality, I am regaining the freedom to be my fullest self. It is only by mastering our desires that we become truly free to choose that which is good. This is what we do each morning on KTC---we choose to live that day without being enslaved to a vice which is deeply harmful to us, without orienting ourselves around the indulgence of an addiction. And while it is hard to think about "quitting for the rest of my life", it is reassuring in many ways to think about "quitting for today, and promising to quit when I wake up tomorrow".

Big thanks to all my fellow window-lickers, and the vets giving back by supporting us---here's looking forward to week 2.

[RDB]

Nice intro. Welcome. Proud to quit with you.

[69franx]

Awesome intro Koba. Great decision to quit now. Wish I had been able or willing to quit 1 year, or 5 years, or ten years or even 20 years sooner than I did. Get to know the site. Get involved. Get to know your quit group by name. Make this place a meeting place, not just a place you post a number and disappear for 24 hours. Ask questions, vent, post your victories, etc. PM with digits coming your way, check your inbox, upper right hand corner.

[Thumblewort]

Good intro, glad I can quit with you today!

[gottadoit]

Welcome koba! Glad you ate a part of August 18. We quit one day at a time and we hold each other accountable. My digits will be in your PM shortly.

Keep on quittin on!

[koba]

I figured I'd post an introduction, since today was the first day that I posted roll in the August 18 Pre-HOF Group (apparently we're The Butt Chuggin', Tide Pod Eatin', Rubber Snortin' Window Lickers: The Next Generation. If that's not a crazy name, I don't know what is). Dipped for ~8 years, starting when I was in high school. It was pretty prevalent, especially among the athletes. In the coming years, it became a crutch. I was up to a can/can and a half per day, until today.

I'm here because I'm tired of all the things that come along with dipping. The wasted hours out of my day, the money spent on feeding my addiction, the strain my habit placed on my personal relationships, the constant health worries, the screwed up sleep schedule---I'm tired of all of the bullshit. I'm tired of placing so much time and effort and mental energy into a substance that has nothing but a negative impact in my life. But most of all, I'm fucking tired of being anything less than my best self because I couldn't sack up and do what needs to be done. So from here on out, I'm doing the damn thing. I'm excited to be here, and excited to take my first steps towards better living, one day at a time.