I am 44 and have been dipping on and off forever. Much more on than off of late. My cube is quiet and the perfect place to enjoy one. Worked from home today where I cannot enjoy the little blue tin of skoal. Seeing the kids, reading this forum and just getting old, perhaps sentimental, got me thinking it is about time I quit. You know, the different *quit* where you don't look back. You move on. Like, I am done with you my fucking disgusting little habit that has been only for me ... well, for a long time.
So no substitutes this time. No cigars ... sorry guys, no fucking booze either. Problems run deep in my genes. Haters bring it on but we all got our crosses to bear. I am "gifted" with a desire to overdo. Works great for the good things in life like being there for my kids, hitting the gym and striving to do well in work and before, school. Its a death sentence for bad habits like drugs, drink and other such pursuits. I envy those folks who can do things in moderation ... it just never worked for me. Got the scars and stories that go on for miles. Hurt and been hurt enough to know that I am not a moderate person.
So tomorrow should be OK. I will work from home again where it is easier. I will keep the kids close and avoid trouble areas like my cube, or walking the dog alone, driving up in the hills alone ... but for now, I just want to get to bed w/o breaking this promise.
See you at roll call tomorrow. And for fucks sake, lets not have a dip before bed.
