16 years later, I quit

[BigRedDog]

320

There's an artist named Ren, who has a song called "Hi Ren" a song about basically the psychological warfare in his head and the struggle that it is to live with it.

He then gives a monologue at the end speaking of his battle, and he states that at 17 he declared in an empty room he would defeat the forces of evil. That he spent the next 10 years suffering from autoimmune disease, illness and psychosis. Until one day he realized that this is not a battle to be won, but a dance. That the more rigid and hard he made himself and how much he beat himself up self for clumsy footsteps it just grew darker.

Once he realized when he relaxed and forgave himself and realized that there is no battle to be won it's a dance, and as the light gets stronger, the shadow grows darker.

Beautiful song and perfect way to visualize and explain what mental health and the battle vs the darkness is like and the power of your own mindset vs the forces of evil.

That dance in his words, is what separates humans from demons and angels and what imakes is different from Gods.

What a reflection

[Keith0617]

318

Had a nightmare week and came out of it calm, not spiraling and filled with stress.

Had major life issues, and cussed about it for 20 minutes then hunkered down and took care of the issue. Never once wanted a dip or drink, never wanted for anything. Took care of it and am fine.

I avoided the self hate cycle, avoided the spiral where my life always fell apart.

This week was a win.

That is awesome brother. Remember you have a family to help with things get hard at KTC.

[BigRedDog]

318

Had a nightmare week and came out of it calm, not spiraling and filled with stress.

Had major life issues, and cussed about it for 20 minutes then hunkered down and took care of the issue. Never once wanted a dip or drink, never wanted for anything. Took care of it and am fine.

I avoided the self hate cycle, avoided the spiral where my life always fell apart.

This week was a win.

[Keith0617]

300

Huge congrats on 300 @BigRedDog. That is freaking awesome. I love how after focusing only on one day at a time, every now and then, a number smacks you in the face to let you know the ODAAT really do eventually add up.

[BigRedDog]

300

[BigRedDog]

296

https://www.harmanrohde.com/obituary/royce-danny-adkins?lud=052D903ECA06CCBBFCF2D2DF70F5276F&fbclid=IwdGRjcAP7PRVjbGNrA_s84GV4dG4DYWVtAjExAHNydGMGYXBwX2lkDDM1MDY4NTUzMTcyOAABHhRVvUOSdvgkSVe__ehMF93xa54w2fUc4UachEHkZq5xpmb3doZ9Ee0MjCsJ_aem_kVGWX1NJQ0YNuB1DhVTgKQ

[BigRedDog]

295

Today the world lost Danny Adkins, from Severance Kansas. 76 years old.

One of the most gentle kind hearted human beings ever. Went through Vietnam driving a tank, while drinking and smoking like he did since he was 16 and did it up until he passed.

Danny was the closest thing to a real family member I had. He took me in like his son, seeing as his son passed decades earlier. He looked out for me, and hell ..at the age of 68 walked off my roof as we were working on repairing it.

He never got mad, and didn't matter what he had ..he would help you out.

As the lung cancer came and took half a lung, the doctors, his wife ..noone could get him to stop the damn smoking and drinking.

So when the cancer came back it was no surprise, and then he refused treatment. And now a year and 2 months later he's dead. A long drawn out, suffering death that never truly had to be....idk if he would of loved longer, but he refused all treatments. Refused oxygen, refused everything.

So he suffered, couldn't breath, hurt....all because he wanted to smoke and get drunk.

Rest easy Danny, be at peace finally.

[DWEIRICK]

285, done with the train of January and honestly I'm glad.

Love doing it but I am tired. It was a long month.

2 weeks to my next tattoo session

Thanks for your hard work and dedication to the members of January!! You did one hell of a job brother!! I still need to book my KTC ink session!!

[BigRedDog]

285, done with the train of January and honestly I'm glad.

Love doing it but I am tired. It was a long month.

2 weeks to my next tattoo session

[BigRedDog]

283 and January is almost done... It was different conducting this time around, wasn't quite as eye opening...but was good to be able to pass along what I've learned in the months that have gone on since I made it

Feeling good and moving forward jne day at a time... Won't be long and we will be celebrating a year quit which is wild to think

Both because who would of ever thought I'd make it a year, and where the hell did the time go

Never underestimate the impact of giving back!

Dude, I'm coming up on 10 years in April and I still remember vividly engaging with folks on my first day at KTC. Crazy but incredible!

284

10 years is crazy! Honored to quit with you

[MN_Engineer]

283 and January is almost done... It was different conducting this time around, wasn't quite as eye opening...but was good to be able to pass along what I've learned in the months that have gone on since I made it

Feeling good and moving forward jne day at a time... Won't be long and we will be celebrating a year quit which is wild to think

Both because who would of ever thought I'd make it a year, and where the hell did the time go

Never underestimate the impact of giving back!

Dude, I'm coming up on 10 years in April and I still remember vividly engaging with folks on my first day at KTC. Crazy but incredible!

[BigRedDog]

283 and January is almost done... It was different conducting this time around, wasn't quite as eye opening...but was good to be able to pass along what I've learned in the months that have gone on since I made it

Feeling good and moving forward jne day at a time... Won't be long and we will be celebrating a year quit which is wild to think

Both because who would of ever thought I'd make it a year, and where the hell did the time go

[BigRedDog]

255

Crazy to think but for the first time since highschool I have started a year without nicotine in the body.

2026 gonna be a great year

[MN_Engineer]

250

Uncle Danny is in hospice now. Stage 4 cancer spread to his brain, least surprising news after he refused treatment a year ago. Man spent his entire life on cigs and alcohol. Age 13 to 78, while I don't judge as he has been through Vietnam and shit and who knows what that did to him....just crazy to watch the addiction in action still.

On his death bed, he didn't want to go home and be with family...he wanted to go home so he could smoke and drink.

He lost half a lung and they told him stop, and he went home with a cig in his mouth and chugged a beer.

A great, caring, soft hearted man who would do anything for anyone. The man was 70 years old teaching me construction as I rebuilt a house years ago and he fell through my roof, got up cussing at himself and smoked on his way back to his house while he was all cut up and bleeding.

Once healed he went right back to helping. Wouldn't even care about his own well being just wanted to help people....

Then his own family, his own kids, his sister, none of them went to his house for his last Christmas.

Such a sad, sad week.

Watching addiction, while not ending a life, certainly pushed it along quickly, and watching a great man be ignored by his family.

Sad sad shit.

Incredibly thankful for his service. Praying his remaining days are peaceful and pain free. Thanks for sharing his story and helping inspire others to continue fighting the addictions in our lives.

[BigRedDog]

250

Uncle Danny is in hospice now. Stage 4 cancer spread to his brain, least surprising news after he refused treatment a year ago. Man spent his entire life on cigs and alcohol. Age 13 to 78, while I don't judge as he has been through Vietnam and shit and who knows what that did to him....just crazy to watch the addiction in action still.

On his death bed, he didn't want to go home and be with family...he wanted to go home so he could smoke and drink.

He lost half a lung and they told him stop, and he went home with a cig in his mouth and chugged a beer.

A great, caring, soft hearted man who would do anything for anyone. The man was 70 years old teaching me construction as I rebuilt a house years ago and he fell through my roof, got up cussing at himself and smoked on his way back to his house while he was all cut up and bleeding.

Once healed he went right back to helping. Wouldn't even care about his own well being just wanted to help people....

Then his own family, his own kids, his sister, none of them went to his house for his last Christmas.

Such a sad, sad week.

Watching addiction, while not ending a life, certainly pushed it along quickly, and watching a great man be ignored by his family.

Sad sad shit.