As posted today at QS2 ...
Friends,
Over the past couple of days, I have received a few phone calls and several emails asking my opinion about the events of the last week. While I realize not everyone wants to know what I have to say, I am humbled that my input is important to some of you. I have thought long and hard about this; in fact, I have agonized over the situation (some of you know) and I'll admit that I still am not sure what to make of all this. Frankly, I see valid points on both sides. Part of me believes it would be prudent to continue to keep my mouth shut. After all, in order for healing to take place, it is important to stop the bleeding. I am aware that further discussion of these matters may postpone the healing process, and I do not want to keep picking at the scabs, but I also do not want my silence to be confused with indifference.
So I have collected my thoughts and believe that I can now articulate them effectively. Again, I realize they may not be all that important to some, perhaps many, of you. However, for those who have asked and for those who may simply want to know, I will share them.
First, I believe the most important thing is that each of us remain quit. Today, I made the promise, "no tobacco today" and I intend to keep that promise. I expect the same from you. Tomorrow we will make that same promise and be committed to keeping it. So above all else, stay strong and stay quit my brothers!
Let me also say that I value this site, the relationships that have been forged and the quits that have grown from infancy into mature commitments. This forum and the group of people assembled here have been my extended family over the last 7+ months. We share a common bond that I imagine to be similar, albeit on a much smaller scale, to that experienced by veterans in combat. We have fought together and beaten a common enemy back into submission. And yet the battles will continue. Other brave men and women will join our fight and they will need our support. They will look to us for encouragement, advice and camaraderie.
And we will look them straight in the face and offer them two choices ... QS2 or QSX?
I have watched from the sidelines over the past week or so during the storm that developed. What I've seen has been disturbing. There have been hurt feelings, misunderstandings and overeactions. I have witnessed knee-jerking, stubborness and pride that has blinded both sides. Two different factions at war with each other yet claiming to be fighting for the same cause. If we are not careful, this is a pissing match that will yield no winners, only losers. And who might those losers be? Not me and not you. We are already quit and we have gained the necessary tools to stay that way. No, it will be those in the early stages of quitting and those still confined by the shackles of addiction. They currently need and/or will need all the support available. Will we be able to provide the tools and support necessary to aid them in their time of need or will we be able to offer them only a fraction of what they really require because we are divided?
When I began my journey towards freedom from tobacco, I was terrified, lonely, completely addicted to nicotine, weighed down by a 1.2 ounce fiberboard can and yet somehow, I was cautiously optimistic that I would someday be free. A few weeks later, as I was really desperate, I stumbled upon QS.org and there I found what I needed to remain quit. The freedom I now have is very precious to me. I'm sure many of you feel the same way. We are no longer in bondage to a killer chemical and we have each other to thank.
What is the price of this freedom? Not just ours, but also the freedom of those who will follow? What is an addict's freedom worth? Perhaps a better question is this ... what would you be willing to pay, or endure, or tolerate in order to secure the freedom of an enslaved junkie?
I realize you have principals and sometimes you must fight to preserve your rights.
So now you may find yourself in a position where the rights and priveleges you once enjoyed have been taken away (or at least it appears that way). But what have you really lost; what has actually been taken from you; what price have you paid? Or is it more a matter of the unknown. How much more might it cost? Which liberties might you have to surrender?
Are these questions all that important in comparison to someone's life. That really may be the price here you know. In order to secure your liberties, someone's quit may have to be ransomed because we, as a group, have been divided and the help we were once able to provide has been diluted through division.
Please consider the cost of your choices. The decisions you make affect many people including me.
We all have limited time to devote to this war on smokeless tobacco. Our own quits are important and so are the quits of our present and future friends. I too struggle with priorities. Time has become my most precious commodity. My wife, my two small children and my career are important, but so is this battle against smokeless tobacco. This addiction truly does not play favorites Â… it will destroy anyone willing to participate.
The dilemma I now face is how can I effectively contribute to both forums. I am concerned that each of us will ultimately need to answer the question, "where will you hang your hat?" For some, this may be a conscious decision and for others, it may simply be that over time, as you post and interact, you gravitate towards one site over the other. I am not advocating that we each make a pledge of allegience in order to exclude the other. No, I believe that I am just stating the obvious ... we each have a limited amount of time to devote. For me, this decision will not be based on who I like more, but will be based on where my involvement will yield the most postive results. I simply cannot devote the time necessary to be the positive influence at both sites that I would like to be. While I anticipate being an active member of both QS2 and QSX, the majority of my involvement will be with the newer members of QS2. I have many friends at both sites and am hopeful that I remain welcome at QSX, but my involvement there will be more limited.
I am still hopeful that many, perhaps all, of the veterans I admire and respect will continue to be involved at QS2. I owe you all a large debt. While I feel horrible for having to make a decision like this and it is not my intent to slight anyone, I do believe it is the correct decision for me to make.
