Wow, the Hall of Fame. How does one really grasp where I am now compared to where I was just a short 100 days ago. My story is like many others. Started at a real young age, thought that I could spit out a pound on my way to wrestling meets in highschool, hid it from most everyone including my parents. After going through Basic Combat Training in 1991 I picked up the can and chose it as my main "I am so cool" habit. The reason I say main is because I had the secondary also the good ole cigarettes. I was a nicotine whore and would take it any way I could get it. I remember on several occasions sitting around the barracks drinking with some buddies and I would have a dip in and smoking a cigarette at the same time.
I am married for the second time. My first wife had no clue that for the 5 years we were married I went through a can of copenshit every day. Once in awhile I would get messy and she would see it in my teeth. The common reply "Oh I had pizza for lunch today, must be pepper". Once we went our seperate ways I did finally tell her. She acted like it was such a huge thing, I think she forgot she was a cheating whore who moved in with some other guy while I was Korea. Guess that is another story. When I met my second wife, who happens to be the most beautiful woman in the world, I once again started down that road of subversion. When we met she knew I dipped. In an effort to appeal to her more I told her I was going to quit. In the end those early days of together were as far as I had made it in an effort to quit. Instead I couldn't handle the pressure and I caved. Though I didn't know it my marriage to her almost ended because of the dip. You see, I was one of those guys that while retarded and needing that nicotine fix on the weekend I would take those meaningless drives just to get that fix. My wife thought I didn't want to be with her or the rest of our family. She had decided that I was trying to escape from her when really I was just kneeling down to the nic bitch. She knew I dipped, but she never said anything. I knew she knew, but I was too retarded to just say screw it and dip around her. I stayed dumb and she stayed mad.
Then in March of 2007 I got notified that I was being deployed in April. Which is where I am now.
So how did I come about the decision to quit? Good question.
You see I know some great guys. We all used to chew or dip. Old Bobby Rico always had his Redman and James(aka RWB from Dec 2007 group) had his copenhagen. These were my friends in nicotine and now they are my friends in quit. So anyways Bobby and James quit late in 2007. We had talked about it, but I wasn't ready. I still had that fight left in me. You know the one, the one that says "I love dipping, I don't care about what the consequences are". Something happened on the 13th of February that would change my life. Sitting in Iraq celebrating my 35th birthday I had kind of a epiphany. I had just pulled out a dip and thought how ridiculous was I. I looked up some stuff on the internet and read a few things. James had mentioned this website so I got on the phone and called him to get the address. I read a bunch of stuff on the website and it all just made sense. I love my wife and I love my sons. Why would I want to kill myself. Why would I be so selfish. So I reached in my pocket and not only threw away the half can, but the full backup can under it and started to build my account and figure out how to do roll call.
I can truthfully say that since I have quit I have noticed a change in my life. My teeth and gums are finally healing and looking right. My wife is excited about seeing me and me being able to smile more. I am pumped about coming home a new man.
I want to thank everyone of the TAKE THAT FUCKER quit group! You guys rock and I know I didn't say much (until closer to the end)but reading and following along with your trials and tribulations is what helped to keep me going. I said from the beginning I was a geek and that is what lead to making my tracker for everyone.
A special Thank You to all the admins of this site. This place is amazing and you do a great job of letting us live this experience. Don't change anything you do.
To those I disagree with 'Finger' . Nah just kidding.
RWB thanks for leading me to this site and for the support. That is what real friends do.
Last but not least to those that are on the bubble or just starting your quit. Take the plunge, it is a wild ride. Use this board the way it is and you have some of the smartest quit people in the world. Make new brothers and sisters and learn to laugh at some of the stupidity of the nicotine bitch. The free way of life is the way to go.
Thanks again to everyone for putting up with me and for helping me along the way and I look forward to many more floors in my future.
Jason
