I honestly don’t fear going back to chew, I quit for myself and I will not fail. I do fear not feeling completely normal for what that is worth. However it’s possible I don’t know what normal really is and how much better I might be.
1021 days and I had a fucking cave dream so bad this morning I jumped out of bed with cold sweats with tears in my eyes. 1021 days and the fucking nic bitch is still hard at work. Just when you think you got it's ass whipped, the ol' bitch will lure you back in. And the worst part was I vividly remember saying to myself, FUCK !!!!!! Now I gotta go answer 3 questions and get burned at the stake at KTC. That was the worst part. I let down my KTC quit brothers and sisters. It was only a dream but still it really sucked major ass.
16 years almost 17 years smoke free. I had a dream not a week ago I bummed a cigarette off of a buddy at a party and said ahh fuck it and started smoking again. Once again, KTC came into the dream as well.
Good old self will got us right to where we are today, addicted! There is an old term out there anybody who is a friend of Bill will understand when I say, "Self will run riot".
Grab a hold of your quit and embrace it good. Embrace your brothers and sisters of quit even more! Each of us needs each other worse than what we think we do. Just when you think the bitch is gone...... The story always goes well I was at a party having a few drink when suddenly .......
1021 days and still proud as fuck to be quit with each and every one of you every damn day!
