WW Introduction

[AppleJack]

A post from yesterday (day 135) and one from today from my April group...this post HOF phase is tough.

IÂ’m reaching my breaking point with quitting. IÂ’m thinking more and more of throwing in the towel and saying fuck it. IÂ’ve been dealing with tension in my jaw since I quit. Some days it is ok and other days it just plain sucks. I find myself romancing the dip again and not hating it. Some days I find myself longing for what I think are happier times when I used to dip. I know this feeling will past but when? 90% of my days are awesome and I really love being quit. It is that 10% that just doesnÂ’t want to go away. I donÂ’t have major craves but more of a longingÂ…a sadness. My brain is telling me that those times when I dipped where awesome and you will not have that much fun again. IÂ’m writing this out to show and tell myself that this longing and sadness is all BS. It will get better. It is another one of Nic Bitches attempts at controlling me. It just plain sucks though.

I’m not going anywhere. When I left work yesterday to drive home…I thought about dip and what would happen if I bought a tin. In the past…after an extended break…and I would get the fuck its and my thoughts turned to buying a tin. I would get this rush…this high…like a drug and couldn’t wait to get to the store and buy one. Yesterday…nothing…no high or rush. Just utter disappointment if I bought one. I also thought about the promise that I made on roll. No way could I let you guys down. My word means something to me. My thoughts then turned to maybe tomorrow? But that didn’t go very far either…because…we quit today and worry about tomorrow…tomorrow. So then I thought…why this funk? What is happening or not happening that I’m dealing with this shit since day 120 or so. I think I need a vacation from quitting and work. I can’t vacation from quitting though so I’ll just take some time off from work. I haven’t had a day off from work, other than company holidays, since December. That is way too long…I need “ME” time. I have some vacation days coming up next week. I can’t wait. Let's QLF today.

Good medicine White...
It is a battle, but a hill worth dieing on.
Vacation is good.
Everybody needs time to sharpen the axe.
Keep posting, keep sharing, keep winning.
It gets better.
Rawls 549

I don't put too much stock in the funk time line that's been laid out. I think it sets up a fear of sorts and you can work yourself up to it. Not to say we don't get 'em! I sure dealt with a few!

But... that post HOF one is freaky and right on the money for most. It's pretty damn weird! I thought a lot about it at the time and really... it's a bit of a let down that hits you. You just spent an enormous amount of energy reaching that 100 day milestone that we pump and pump and pump. I mean... everything you had. I think it was right around 130 where I hit that wall you're at.

Now what!?!

I think we get a glimpse of the long haul and, despite knowing better, we get all reminiscent for that shit.

How f'd up is that!?!

Anyway... power on brother. You know what to do. I'm at 1,129 today and can tell you... that shit pretty much goes away. You're about to hit some awesome stretches and, man, it'll be great. So great.

Keep rockin'...

[Rawls]

A post from yesterday (day 135) and one from today from my April group...this post HOF phase is tough.

IÂ’m reaching my breaking point with quitting. IÂ’m thinking more and more of throwing in the towel and saying fuck it. IÂ’ve been dealing with tension in my jaw since I quit. Some days it is ok and other days it just plain sucks. I find myself romancing the dip again and not hating it. Some days I find myself longing for what I think are happier times when I used to dip. I know this feeling will past but when? 90% of my days are awesome and I really love being quit. It is that 10% that just doesnÂ’t want to go away. I donÂ’t have major craves but more of a longingÂ…a sadness. My brain is telling me that those times when I dipped where awesome and you will not have that much fun again. IÂ’m writing this out to show and tell myself that this longing and sadness is all BS. It will get better. It is another one of Nic Bitches attempts at controlling me. It just plain sucks though.

I’m not going anywhere. When I left work yesterday to drive home…I thought about dip and what would happen if I bought a tin. In the past…after an extended break…and I would get the fuck its and my thoughts turned to buying a tin. I would get this rush…this high…like a drug and couldn’t wait to get to the store and buy one. Yesterday…nothing…no high or rush. Just utter disappointment if I bought one. I also thought about the promise that I made on roll. No way could I let you guys down. My word means something to me. My thoughts then turned to maybe tomorrow? But that didn’t go very far either…because…we quit today and worry about tomorrow…tomorrow. So then I thought…why this funk? What is happening or not happening that I’m dealing with this shit since day 120 or so. I think I need a vacation from quitting and work. I can’t vacation from quitting though so I’ll just take some time off from work. I haven’t had a day off from work, other than company holidays, since December. That is way too long…I need “ME” time. I have some vacation days coming up next week. I can’t wait. Let's QLF today.

Good medicine White...
It is a battle, but a hill worth dieing on.
Vacation is good.
Everybody needs time to sharpen the axe.
Keep posting, keep sharing, keep winning.
It gets better.
Rawls 549

[walterwhite]

A post from yesterday (day 135) and one from today from my April group...this post HOF phase is tough.

IÂ’m reaching my breaking point with quitting. IÂ’m thinking more and more of throwing in the towel and saying fuck it. IÂ’ve been dealing with tension in my jaw since I quit. Some days it is ok and other days it just plain sucks. I find myself romancing the dip again and not hating it. Some days I find myself longing for what I think are happier times when I used to dip. I know this feeling will past but when? 90% of my days are awesome and I really love being quit. It is that 10% that just doesnÂ’t want to go away. I donÂ’t have major craves but more of a longingÂ…a sadness. My brain is telling me that those times when I dipped where awesome and you will not have that much fun again. IÂ’m writing this out to show and tell myself that this longing and sadness is all BS. It will get better. It is another one of Nic Bitches attempts at controlling me. It just plain sucks though.

I’m not going anywhere. When I left work yesterday to drive home…I thought about dip and what would happen if I bought a tin. In the past…after an extended break…and I would get the fuck its and my thoughts turned to buying a tin. I would get this rush…this high…like a drug and couldn’t wait to get to the store and buy one. Yesterday…nothing…no high or rush. Just utter disappointment if I bought one. I also thought about the promise that I made on roll. No way could I let you guys down. My word means something to me. My thoughts then turned to maybe tomorrow? But that didn’t go very far either…because…we quit today and worry about tomorrow…tomorrow. So then I thought…why this funk? What is happening or not happening that I’m dealing with this shit since day 120 or so. I think I need a vacation from quitting and work. I can’t vacation from quitting though so I’ll just take some time off from work. I haven’t had a day off from work, other than company holidays, since December. That is way too long…I need “ME” time. I have some vacation days coming up next week. I can’t wait. Let's QLF today.

[Stranger999]

Great stuff here Heisenberg. Keep pressing forward! :)

This place is sort of like that movie The Matrix - everything that is happening now has happened before in all of the earlier quit groups. The good news is that we can cheat and read ahead. Normally I don't like spoilers but here they are great. We can all get a sense of what life will be like at day 10, 50, 80, 120, 200, 400, etc...

I learn a lot just by posting in some of the older groups. Ask some folks from 2014 or earlier why they are still posting roll every day. It is simple enough - they still post here because it keeps them quit. We can't forget about our addiction, or ever pretend that it isn't a problem anymore. We need to actively battle it.

You're doing great. I quit with you today!

[JB65]

Day 127...

This past Saturday just plan sucked. It felt like I was back at square one again. The nic bitch was calling my name all day long. It was whisperingÂ…just go buy a tin. I felt in control of the situation but it wasnÂ’t very enjoyable. I was glad I made my promise early in the day. It was one of the tools that I used to overcome the whispering. Last night I had the most intense dip dream. I had caved and I thoughtÂ…how do I hide this from the group? I was so disappointed in myself. Even after I woke upÂ…I still felt like it was real. Today I feel this sense of disappointment in myself. Very weird. I havenÂ’t felt right in a couple of days. Before this episodeÂ…I was cruising along and enjoying life.

Today I came across Wildirish317 signature and he had a link that I found usefulÂ…

Please read itÂ…

Two Stages of Withdrawal

That got me thinkingÂ…how can someone just stop posting roll after HOF? Maybe they think they got this addiction under control? Maybe they donÂ’t realize they are addicted anymore. We have lost 15 quitters since HOF. Think back to before you quit. How much did you want to quit? Where you willing to do everything in your power to quit? How much did you hate yourself for being a slave to the can? My question isÂ…what has changed from day 1 that you think that you donÂ’t need KTC? Have you been cured? I havenÂ’t and this weekend was another wakeup call to double down and make sure IÂ’m doing everything in my power to quit. IÂ’m not going back to being a slave to the can because it just fucking sucks.

Bro you had a nice victory last weekend. Look at it as a positive. She tried a different approach and you didn't give in!

I'm at 270 days or thereabouts now, and i still think for me the hardest days were 100-150.

Just as you said, The posting up to 100 is great. HOF congrats all around then the lull. I considered leaving. I can tell you if I left KTC at that time I would be back on the nic right now for sure.

The Nic bitch is crafty. She knows that the physical addiction is done. And is trying different schemes on the mental side of the house.

SO funny about the dip dream. I felt exactly the same on mine. WE have policeman, fireman, weightlifters, jacked up dudes in our group and all i could think of is i have to face them...

Then it hit that it was a dream.

Small victories my man. You are involved member of this site. When I feel sort of lost... like that. I try and find a newbie, or two. And mentor them.

As I always say, me helping a newbie builds the walls of my own quit higher and higher, keeping the leaping Nic bitch just out of reach

You're doing great. Keep it up. I snapped out of it around 150

[walterwhite]

Day 127...

This past Saturday just plan sucked. It felt like I was back at square one again. The nic bitch was calling my name all day long. It was whisperingÂ…just go buy a tin. I felt in control of the situation but it wasnÂ’t very enjoyable. I was glad I made my promise early in the day. It was one of the tools that I used to overcome the whispering. Last night I had the most intense dip dream. I had caved and I thoughtÂ…how do I hide this from the group? I was so disappointed in myself. Even after I woke upÂ…I still felt like it was real. Today I feel this sense of disappointment in myself. Very weird. I havenÂ’t felt right in a couple of days. Before this episodeÂ…I was cruising along and enjoying life.

Today I came across Wildirish317 signature and he had a link that I found usefulÂ…

Please read itÂ…

Two Stages of Withdrawal

That got me thinkingÂ…how can someone just stop posting roll after HOF? Maybe they think they got this addiction under control? Maybe they donÂ’t realize they are addicted anymore. We have lost 15 quitters since HOF. Think back to before you quit. How much did you want to quit? Where you willing to do everything in your power to quit? How much did you hate yourself for being a slave to the can? My question isÂ…what has changed from day 1 that you think that you donÂ’t need KTC? Have you been cured? I havenÂ’t and this weekend was another wakeup call to double down and make sure IÂ’m doing everything in my power to quit. IÂ’m not going back to being a slave to the can because it just fucking sucks.

[walterwhite]

Day 113. Pretty easy stretch of days. I'm liking it.

This past weekend was really busy and I thought about dip a lot. I would think while drivingÂ…I used to dip while driving. Also when I was doing yard work, after yard work, having a couple of beers and etcÂ…Dip was constantly on my mind. I would thinkÂ…go get a tin. It was nice to be able to think it and easily sayÂ…NoÂ….IÂ’m quit. I have no desire to be a slave to the can ever again. I really enjoy my freedom. I know IÂ’m not cured. I know by coming here each day to make my promise it just reinforces my quit. If I didnÂ’t, I would forget the struggle of the first 100 days. I would forget that IÂ’m an addict. That one never works out in the end.

[ChristopherJ]

Congrats WW on what I know is the first of many levels. You are a big reason I am quit and are a positive influence on so many here. You're a hell of a man and a bad ass quitter. Proud to be a Smart Ass-tro w/ you and as always will be right here one day back at the ready - if ever you need anything (except for me rooting for the damn Eagles...)!

Cheers,

Congrats on HOF WW!
And with over 1400 post.
That's a strong foundation of quit.
Rock on Brother!
Rawls 512

Every day sir.

Every day.

You rock.

Congrats on HOF! Our paths have yet to cross but U see your posts all over these boards. Your a BAQ sir!

Wwhite...congrats on your 100 days and beyond, strong quit, fortunate to have you here walking this walk with myself and all!!

Congrats Walter! Keep at ODAAT - you have become a badass quitter.

[ChickDip]

Congrats WW on what I know is the first of many levels. You are a big reason I am quit and are a positive influence on so many here. You're a hell of a man and a bad ass quitter. Proud to be a Smart Ass-tro w/ you and as always will be right here one day back at the ready - if ever you need anything (except for me rooting for the damn Eagles...)!

Cheers,

Congrats on HOF WW!
And with over 1400 post.
That's a strong foundation of quit.
Rock on Brother!
Rawls 512

Every day sir.

Every day.

You rock.

Congrats on HOF! Our paths have yet to cross but U see your posts all over these boards. Your a BAQ sir!

Wwhite...congrats on your 100 days and beyond, strong quit, fortunate to have you here walking this walk with myself and all!!

[wildirish317]

Nice HOF post. I couldn't "like" it, so I'll post here.

The addict thing, I think that's paramount. At least it is for me. When you realize you are addicted, that you are an addict, like those with heroin, it really hits home. You realize it's time to quit. You realize that you can't just stop, you have to find a way to quit. Fortunately, KTC has a proven method.

I quit with you today WW.

[walterwhite]

I posted this in April 2016 but thought I would like to add this as my 100 day post...

I went over 150 days on my last stoppage. Today is day 100 and it feels so much different this time. The last time I wanted to be done with dipping. I hated feeding that addiction daily. Once I was free and at over 100 days I was loving life. But I didnÂ’t realize that I was an addict. So once the opportunity came to buy a can to celebrate my freedom, I did it. It was awesome and I had no regrets. I thoughtÂ…I can just buy one can for the weekend and then I can go back to my freedom. I did that but a week later I bought a new can because my addict brain said that it worked out well last time. After that I was hooked. Back to my 2 tin a day addiction. I remember thinkingÂ… Fuck Me, IÂ’m hooked again. I was such a wimp that it took me 7 months later to finally QUIT. Even the day I quitÂ…I had my doubts and almost bought a tin. Lucky for me I got to work and posted day 1 on KTC.

What I have learned this timeÂ…

1.I’m an Addict – I can never have just one.
2.ODAAT – one day at a time – I no longer need to worry about anything except today. Just get through today and worry about tomorrow…tomorrow.
3.Make quitting a priority in your life. No excuses. Just do it.
4.QUIT – I’m quit – It is an attitude…it is a way a life. I no longer have to worry what will happen when the nic bitch comes calling. I tell her I’m QUIT and that is it.
5.Brotherhood – I have a group of new friends that are going through the same struggles of being Quit that I am. I can call any one of them and they will have my back.

[Tjschu]

Congrats WW on what I know is the first of many levels. You are a big reason I am quit and are a positive influence on so many here. You're a hell of a man and a bad ass quitter. Proud to be a Smart Ass-tro w/ you and as always will be right here one day back at the ready - if ever you need anything (except for me rooting for the damn Eagles...)!

Cheers,

Congrats on HOF WW!
And with over 1400 post.
That's a strong foundation of quit.
Rock on Brother!
Rawls 512

Every day sir.

Every day.

You rock.

Congrats on HOF! Our paths have yet to cross but U see your posts all over these boards. Your a BAQ sir!

[wastepanel]

Congrats WW on what I know is the first of many levels. You are a big reason I am quit and are a positive influence on so many here. You're a hell of a man and a bad ass quitter. Proud to be a Smart Ass-tro w/ you and as always will be right here one day back at the ready - if ever you need anything (except for me rooting for the damn Eagles...)!

Cheers,

Congrats on HOF WW!
And with over 1400 post.
That's a strong foundation of quit.
Rock on Brother!
Rawls 512

Every day sir.

Every day.

You rock.

[Rawls]

Congrats WW on what I know is the first of many levels. You are a big reason I am quit and are a positive influence on so many here. You're a hell of a man and a bad ass quitter. Proud to be a Smart Ass-tro w/ you and as always will be right here one day back at the ready - if ever you need anything (except for me rooting for the damn Eagles...)!

Cheers,

Congrats on HOF WW!
And with over 1400 post.
That's a strong foundation of quit.
Rock on Brother!
Rawls 512

[boots on]

Congrats WW on what I know is the first of many levels. You are a big reason I am quit and are a positive influence on so many here. You're a hell of a man and a bad ass quitter. Proud to be a Smart Ass-tro w/ you and as always will be right here one day back at the ready - if ever you need anything (except for me rooting for the damn Eagles...)!

Cheers,