I'm A Douche

[miles]

Keep fighting SWJ!

Posting roll every day keeps me focused.

Rock on Bro!

[Wt57]

So, a lot of you dudes peeping at this will expect to be laughing uproariously.

You won't be.  This shit isn't funny.

I mean, I've got a whole bunch of funny things on my mind to talk about, including:

• How Kathleen Turner looks like John Goodman
• Why paper streamers and seatbelts taste like shit
• Why the old dude at the Y insists on putting his underpants on last
  
  
  
  

And so on.

But for now, I've got to say that these last two days have been the hardest of all the last 100.

I think it might be because my wife and two boys left for Maine the other day.

You see, in the old days when I was dipping, this would have been Prime Grizzly Time.

No one around.  I could leave my dip can out on the kitchen counter.

I could walk around the house with a fatty in.

I could make a monster sandwich with a side helping of awesomeness and then immediately throw a dip in afterward.

Fucking awesome.

So now I can't do that anymore and I'm a little pissed.  I miss it.

And I was sitting here at my desk thinking about how good it would feel to stop at Cumby's on the way home, buy a tin, go home, and open that shit up...

And I decided it wouldn't feel good at all.

I decided that I'd been there before and I don't remember enjoying being weak.

I didn't enjoy crawling back here.

I needed to stop.  I didn't necessarily want to stop.

And in the end, I'm glad I stopped.

Tomorrow is my Day 100.  It's my 2nd Day 100 but I own it.

I'm a former dipper.

I simply don't do it anymore.

As it turns out, I'm not weak.  I'm a stone killer so bring on the craves.

They won't last as long as I will.

Thanks, dudes.

Great post.

Can't wait for tomorrow.

Kathleen Turner DOES look like John Goodman!

Great post brother!

You are a stone quit killer and I am proud to be quit with you and your awesomeness!

'clap' 'clap' 'clap'

The Phoenix is rising! Glad to see the Fro man speaking again.

Encore! Give us a show,

What if SWJ decided to run for president, what is his policies and what would America be like with him as the leader of the free world?

'oh yeah' 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'

Your fans are hungry

'bj'

Thank you

[Coach Steve]

So, a lot of you dudes peeping at this will expect to be laughing uproariously.

You won't be.  This shit isn't funny.

I mean, I've got a whole bunch of funny things on my mind to talk about, including:

• How Kathleen Turner looks like John Goodman
• Why paper streamers and seatbelts taste like shit
• Why the old dude at the Y insists on putting his underpants on last
  
  
  

And so on.

But for now, I've got to say that these last two days have been the hardest of all the last 100.

I think it might be because my wife and two boys left for Maine the other day.

You see, in the old days when I was dipping, this would have been Prime Grizzly Time.

No one around.  I could leave my dip can out on the kitchen counter.

I could walk around the house with a fatty in.

I could make a monster sandwich with a side helping of awesomeness and then immediately throw a dip in afterward.

Fucking awesome.

So now I can't do that anymore and I'm a little pissed.  I miss it.

And I was sitting here at my desk thinking about how good it would feel to stop at Cumby's on the way home, buy a tin, go home, and open that shit up...

And I decided it wouldn't feel good at all.

I decided that I'd been there before and I don't remember enjoying being weak.

I didn't enjoy crawling back here.

I needed to stop.  I didn't necessarily want to stop.

And in the end, I'm glad I stopped.

Tomorrow is my Day 100.  It's my 2nd Day 100 but I own it.

I'm a former dipper.

I simply don't do it anymore.

As it turns out, I'm not weak.  I'm a stone killer so bring on the craves.

They won't last as long as I will.

Thanks, dudes.

Great post.

Can't wait for tomorrow.

Kathleen Turner DOES look like John Goodman!

Great post brother!

You are a stone quit killer and I am proud to be quit with you and your awesomeness!

'clap' 'clap' 'clap'

The Phoenix is rising! Glad to see the Fro man speaking again.

Encore! Give us a show,

What if SWJ decided to run for president, what is his policies and what would America be like with him as the leader of the free world?

'oh yeah' 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'

Your fans are hungry

'bj'

[Mthomas3824]

So, a lot of you dudes peeping at this will expect to be laughing uproariously.

You won't be.  This shit isn't funny.

I mean, I've got a whole bunch of funny things on my mind to talk about, including:

• How Kathleen Turner looks like John Goodman
• Why paper streamers and seatbelts taste like shit
• Why the old dude at the Y insists on putting his underpants on last
  
  

And so on.

But for now, I've got to say that these last two days have been the hardest of all the last 100.

I think it might be because my wife and two boys left for Maine the other day.

You see, in the old days when I was dipping, this would have been Prime Grizzly Time.

No one around.  I could leave my dip can out on the kitchen counter.

I could walk around the house with a fatty in.

I could make a monster sandwich with a side helping of awesomeness and then immediately throw a dip in afterward.

Fucking awesome.

So now I can't do that anymore and I'm a little pissed.  I miss it.

And I was sitting here at my desk thinking about how good it would feel to stop at Cumby's on the way home, buy a tin, go home, and open that shit up...

And I decided it wouldn't feel good at all.

I decided that I'd been there before and I don't remember enjoying being weak.

I didn't enjoy crawling back here.

I needed to stop.  I didn't necessarily want to stop.

And in the end, I'm glad I stopped.

Tomorrow is my Day 100.  It's my 2nd Day 100 but I own it.

I'm a former dipper.

I simply don't do it anymore.

As it turns out, I'm not weak.  I'm a stone killer so bring on the craves.

They won't last as long as I will.

Thanks, dudes.

Great post.

Can't wait for tomorrow.

Kathleen Turner DOES look like John Goodman!

Great post brother!

You are a stone quit killer and I am proud to be quit with you and your awesomeness!

'clap' 'clap' 'clap'

The Phoenix is rising! Glad to see the Fro man speaking again.

Encore! Give us a show,

What if SWJ decided to run for president, what is his policies and what would America be like with him as the leader of the free world?

'oh yeah' 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'

Your fans are hungry

[Grizzly25]

So, a lot of you dudes peeping at this will expect to be laughing uproariously.

You won't be.  This shit isn't funny.

I mean, I've got a whole bunch of funny things on my mind to talk about, including:

• How Kathleen Turner looks like John Goodman
• Why paper streamers and seatbelts taste like shit
• Why the old dude at the Y insists on putting his underpants on last
  

And so on.

But for now, I've got to say that these last two days have been the hardest of all the last 100.

I think it might be because my wife and two boys left for Maine the other day.

You see, in the old days when I was dipping, this would have been Prime Grizzly Time.

No one around.  I could leave my dip can out on the kitchen counter.

I could walk around the house with a fatty in.

I could make a monster sandwich with a side helping of awesomeness and then immediately throw a dip in afterward.

Fucking awesome.

So now I can't do that anymore and I'm a little pissed.  I miss it.

And I was sitting here at my desk thinking about how good it would feel to stop at Cumby's on the way home, buy a tin, go home, and open that shit up...

And I decided it wouldn't feel good at all.

I decided that I'd been there before and I don't remember enjoying being weak.

I didn't enjoy crawling back here.

I needed to stop.  I didn't necessarily want to stop.

And in the end, I'm glad I stopped.

Tomorrow is my Day 100.  It's my 2nd Day 100 but I own it.

I'm a former dipper.

I simply don't do it anymore.

As it turns out, I'm not weak.  I'm a stone killer so bring on the craves.

They won't last as long as I will.

Thanks, dudes.

Great post.

Can't wait for tomorrow.

Kathleen Turner DOES look like John Goodman!

Great post brother!

You are a stone quit killer and I am proud to be quit with you and your awesomeness!

[Nolaq]

So, a lot of you dudes peeping at this will expect to be laughing uproariously.

You won't be.  This shit isn't funny.

I mean, I've got a whole bunch of funny things on my mind to talk about, including:

• How Kathleen Turner looks like John Goodman
• Why paper streamers and seatbelts taste like shit
• Why the old dude at the Y insists on putting his underpants on last

And so on.

But for now, I've got to say that these last two days have been the hardest of all the last 100.

I think it might be because my wife and two boys left for Maine the other day.

You see, in the old days when I was dipping, this would have been Prime Grizzly Time.

No one around. I could leave my dip can out on the kitchen counter.

I could walk around the house with a fatty in.

I could make a monster sandwich with a side helping of awesomeness and then immediately throw a dip in afterward.

Fucking awesome.

So now I can't do that anymore and I'm a little pissed. I miss it.

And I was sitting here at my desk thinking about how good it would feel to stop at Cumby's on the way home, buy a tin, go home, and open that shit up...

And I decided it wouldn't feel good at all.

I decided that I'd been there before and I don't remember enjoying being weak.

I didn't enjoy crawling back here.

I needed to stop. I didn't necessarily want to stop.

And in the end, I'm glad I stopped.

Tomorrow is my Day 100. It's my 2nd Day 100 but I own it.

I'm a former dipper.

I simply don't do it anymore.

As it turns out, I'm not weak. I'm a stone killer so bring on the craves.

They won't last as long as I will.

Thanks, dudes.

Great post.

Can't wait for tomorrow.

Kathleen Turner DOES look like John Goodman!

[SWJ]

So, a lot of you dudes peeping at this will expect to be laughing uproariously.

You won't be. This shit isn't funny.

I mean, I've got a whole bunch of funny things on my mind to talk about, including:

• How Kathleen Turner looks like John Goodman
• Why paper streamers and seatbelts taste like shit
• Why the old dude at the Y insists on putting his underpants on last

And so on.

But for now, I've got to say that these last two days have been the hardest of all the last 100.

I think it might be because my wife and two boys left for Maine the other day.

You see, in the old days when I was dipping, this would have been Prime Grizzly Time.

No one around. I could leave my dip can out on the kitchen counter.

I could walk around the house with a fatty in.

I could make a monster sandwich with a side helping of awesomeness and then immediately throw a dip in afterward.

Fucking awesome.

So now I can't do that anymore and I'm a little pissed. I miss it.

And I was sitting here at my desk thinking about how good it would feel to stop at Cumby's on the way home, buy a tin, go home, and open that shit up...

And I decided it wouldn't feel good at all.

I decided that I'd been there before and I don't remember enjoying being weak.

I didn't enjoy crawling back here.

I needed to stop. I didn't necessarily want to stop.

And in the end, I'm glad I stopped.

Tomorrow is my Day 100. It's my 2nd Day 100 but I own it.

I'm a former dipper.

I simply don't do it anymore.

As it turns out, I'm not weak. I'm a stone killer so bring on the craves.

They won't last as long as I will.

Thanks, dudes.

[rgross298]

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Dude, back in '09, you had to have been the guy I remember bringing up the can behind the ball-sac...

I know it had to be you, because no one writes that shit but you.

Thanks for the MUCH needed laugh today.

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Dude, back in '09, you had to have been the guy I remember bringing up the can behind the ball-sac...

I know it had to be you, because no one writes that shit but you.

Thanks for the MUCH needed laugh today.

This is some pretty funny shit you guys are posting here today.. for real.. I needed some funny.. I AM IN THE 3RD DAY OF SUCK! actually it only really sucked a few times today..I honestly felt some real freedom today as well.. that was very cool! One thing I've never done is hid dip from my wives or girlfriends? They either could like it or get the fuck off my hoss! Even Mrs Kentucky! No shit I was married for 4 years to 2001 Mrs Kentucky.. I didnt even hid my dipping from her! We didn't make it.. I think she actually thought i was rich  I thought she was hot.. Mrs Kentucky with out make up spelled backwards is "BUTTFUCKINGUGLY"..

Dude, it is time for a new SWJ post. I need some shit from the killer FRO man!!

Where the hell has he been?

[mikegooch]

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Dude, back in '09, you had to have been the guy I remember bringing up the can behind the ball-sac...

I know it had to be you, because no one writes that shit but you.

Thanks for the MUCH needed laugh today.

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Dude, back in '09, you had to have been the guy I remember bringing up the can behind the ball-sac...

I know it had to be you, because no one writes that shit but you.

Thanks for the MUCH needed laugh today.

This is some pretty funny shit you guys are posting here today.. for real.. I needed some funny.. I AM IN THE 3RD DAY OF SUCK! actually it only really sucked a few times today..I honestly felt some real freedom today as well.. that was very cool! One thing I've never done is hid dip from my wives or girlfriends? They either could like it or get the fuck off my hoss! Even Mrs Kentucky! No shit I was married for 4 years to 2001 Mrs Kentucky.. I didnt even hid my dipping from her! We didn't make it.. I think she actually thought i was rich  I thought she was hot.. Mrs Kentucky with out make up spelled backwards is "BUTTFUCKINGUGLY"..

[Grizzly25]

Dreams

Ok, so my dreams lately have been fucking me up.

All my life, my dreams at night time have always had several things in common:

1. I can fly if I want to.
2. I know kung-fu better than anyone.
3. Chicks dig me.
4. I always win at everything, including saving the entire universe.
5. The bad guys all look like Black Bart from A Christmas Story
6. I always get invited to Letterman after ruining the shit of Black Bart and his henchmen.

Lately though, every dream has also included dip.

I can't seem to escape the fact that I'm dipping ninja-style in every dream.

Plus, I'm fucking people up with my kung-fu because they noticed and are going to rat me out.

Last night, in my dream, my lunch lady from 6th grade was at my house, peeped me sneaking a pinch and started pointing.

She stood there on the other side of my moat, saying she was going to drop a dime.

So I flew up into the air, came down on the other side of my moat, and started tuning her up.

She was tough too, but I put a popknot on her head you could open a gift shop on.

But then I got nervous that maybe she told.

(Who she told, I don't know...maybe you bitches.)

Anyway, these dream are cramping my style  I'm not enjoying them very much.

It's like you might dream of throwing a poke into Kelly Ripa, but in your dream you can't get your top hat off.

It's irritating and doesn't represent your best foot forward.

It's weird, it's bothering me, and I thought that maybe if I got it out there, it would just go away.

I'll let you know.

I figured I would bump this so all the newbies could enjoy the SWJ humor machine!!!

This page is truly one of the best was to fight off a crave or cave....

Enjoy

[Moondawggy]

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Our pleasure Bro.

[Colonel_No_Cope]

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Dude, back in '09, you had to have been the guy I remember bringing up the can behind the ball-sac...

I know it had to be you, because no one writes that shit but you.

Thanks for the MUCH needed laugh today.

[Mthomas3824]

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Whenever I see you put up a new post. I know it is going to be a must read.

You didn't fail again. Great words and props to your writing ability. You can write in a way that I understand, relate and feel the emotions behind it.

Side note: You're the guy that could smuggle cans behind your ball sac? I know this is weird but if we every have a KTC rally. Can I see your balls? There is no way a can could hide behind mine. I promise it isn't anything sexual. It would be like going to a museum for me. It is all about education.

[Grizzly25]

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...

Anytime! ;)

[SWJ]

A Shout-Out To My Posse

Today, I give props to you bitches.

I got rid of the Grizzly but you motherfuckers have made sure she stayed gone.

Because of you, I now spend less time pooping...

Because of you, I don't freak out when my wife asks if she can use my truck...

I don't keep things hidden behind my ball sac anymore...

I have a lot more time to do things other than dip-scheme and you know what I'm talking about.

At times, it sucks and I miss it.

But then I think of Chris, Dean, Ethan, Guy, Jeff, Josh, Justin, Kevin, Lou, Mark, Rose, Russ, Scott, Spring, Terry, and the rest of you penis-wrinkles and I can't cave.

As much as I would have like to yesterday, I just can't do it.

Fuck you very much.

It's nice to have my life back, thanks to you...