I'm Quitting Tomorrow (6/1/13)

[Mthomas3824]

Blackhawks - Feb 20, 2014, 4:21 pm 

Today, I broke down and had a chew. I had the chew in my mouth for about 5 minutes, started to get really angry with myself and threw it out with the rest of the tin. I have been going through some very difficult and stressful times in my personal life. That is no excuse. Everyone has tough times but we should not relapse. I was a weak little pussy for caving like that. I am disgusted with myself and extremely sorry to let everyone in the KTC community down. I overcame many stressful and challenging times during my 265 day quit but ultimately I caved. I am extremely motivated to begin a new quit. Tomorrow will be my Day 1. KTC helped me make it 265 days which was by far the longest and most successful run for me. I would love to be able to begin again on KTC, if you guys will have me back. I understand completely, however, if I am no longer welcome. What can I do to be accepted back?
- Blackhawks

Damn man, I hate to see a good quitter go down like this.  My suggestion for starters is the reflect on the three questions and answer with your heart and your fellow quitters will go from there...

1 - What Happened? (explained in above excerpt from your Group Post)
2 - Why did it happen?  (insufficient answer)
3 - what are you going to do differently?

Damn - I feel sad.

Well like we have seen in times past and times yet to come, some addicts retrun to their vice like a dog to its own vomit.

Sometimes I feel like I'm alone in my absolute anger, frustration and resentment to the can of lies.

I just don't understand if you came her humble and determined to quit, make it as far as the HOF, why you think humping a can of nicotine is a more valuable trade in for the work you put into divorce her?

She is evil. Her evil is subtle. Slow, patient and steady. Just as addictive as heroine but not respected to be as dangerous as heroine. Ahhhh CANCER? But she is sly, she is legal, she is no big deal. She is tolerated.....You miss her. You glamorize that the slavery was secure. Just smell it, just a little taste. OH FUCK ME. What did I do? I hate this. I was weak.

No you weren't. I am the weak pussy that is intelligent enought to respect the cunning craftiness of the enemy. I am not quit forever and can not think past today. I quit today and that all I worry about.

You are not weak, you were careless and dumb. Like a dog that laps up its vomit.

Quit but do it right and take this shit serious.

[RAZD611]

Blackhawks - Feb 20, 2014, 4:21 pm 

Today, I broke down and had a chew. I had the chew in my mouth for about 5 minutes, started to get really angry with myself and threw it out with the rest of the tin. I have been going through some very difficult and stressful times in my personal life. That is no excuse. Everyone has tough times but we should not relapse. I was a weak little pussy for caving like that. I am disgusted with myself and extremely sorry to let everyone in the KTC community down. I overcame many stressful and challenging times during my 265 day quit but ultimately I caved. I am extremely motivated to begin a new quit. Tomorrow will be my Day 1. KTC helped me make it 265 days which was by far the longest and most successful run for me. I would love to be able to begin again on KTC, if you guys will have me back. I understand completely, however, if I am no longer welcome. What can I do to be accepted back?
- Blackhawks

Damn man, I hate to see a good quitter go down like this.  My suggestion for starters is the reflect on the three questions and answer with your heart and your fellow quitters will go from there...

1 - What Happened? (explained in above excerpt from your Group Post)
2 - Why did it happen?  (insufficient answer)
3 - what are you going to do differently?

Answer in your old quit group and your new quit group. Tomorrow you will be in May, if Day 1 is Saturday, you'll be in June.

Here is another suggestion. when you come in this house, leave your little pink panties at the door.

Hope it was worth it. In fact I hope you choked on it.

Character and Integrity are requirements. Please show some.

[slug.go]

Blackhawks - Feb 20, 2014, 4:21 pm

Today, I broke down and had a chew. I had the chew in my mouth for about 5 minutes, started to get really angry with myself and threw it out with the rest of the tin. I have been going through some very difficult and stressful times in my personal life. That is no excuse. Everyone has tough times but we should not relapse. I was a weak little pussy for caving like that. I am disgusted with myself and extremely sorry to let everyone in the KTC community down. I overcame many stressful and challenging times during my 265 day quit but ultimately I caved. I am extremely motivated to begin a new quit. Tomorrow will be my Day 1. KTC helped me make it 265 days which was by far the longest and most successful run for me. I would love to be able to begin again on KTC, if you guys will have me back. I understand completely, however, if I am no longer welcome. What can I do to be accepted back?
- Blackhawks

Damn man, I hate to see a good quitter go down like this. My suggestion for starters is the reflect on the three questions and answer with your heart and your fellow quitters will go from there...

1 - What Happened? (explained in above excerpt from your Group Post)
2 - Why did it happen? (insufficient answer)
3 - what are you going to do differently?

Answer in your old quit group and your new quit group. Tomorrow you will be in May, if Day 1 is Saturday, you'll be in June.

[Pinched]

Blackhawks - Feb 20, 2014, 4:21 pm

Today, I broke down and had a chew. I had the chew in my mouth for about 5 minutes, started to get really angry with myself and threw it out with the rest of the tin. I have been going through some very difficult and stressful times in my personal life. That is no excuse. Everyone has tough times but we should not relapse. I was a weak little pussy for caving like that. I am disgusted with myself and extremely sorry to let everyone in the KTC community down. I overcame many stressful and challenging times during my 265 day quit but ultimately I caved. I am extremely motivated to begin a new quit. Tomorrow will be my Day 1. KTC helped me make it 265 days which was by far the longest and most successful run for me. I would love to be able to begin again on KTC, if you guys will have me back. I understand completely, however, if I am no longer welcome. What can I do to be accepted back?
- Blackhawks

Damn man, I hate to see a good quitter go down like this. My suggestion for starters is the reflect on the three questions and answer with your heart and your fellow quitters will go from there...

1 - What Happened? (explained in above excerpt from your Group Post)
2 - Why did it happen? (insufficient answer)
3 - what are you going to do differently?

[B-loMatt]

Nice work Blackhawks! You are bad assed!

[Mike from AB]

Congrats to BH on a new baby and HOF!

[Evil_Won]

Congrats on day 100 Blackhawks. I read through your intro from your first post through today. Lots of great stuff in there that shows how far you've come along. My initial offer to come over and randsack your place and/or buy you a beer still stand. Let me know when.

[Erussell]

Hey brother congrats on the new baby and you HOF. Big time in your life. I quit with you as hard as I can, Erussell.


We have two major things to congratulate Blackhawks for. First he is a new Dad again, he has two boys, his first turns two on day 100 and his second was born 3 days ago. Second he is hitting HOF today. This Attorney dipped scoal strait since he was 18 and is from Glenview IL. He claims he is bringing the Stanley cup which the Blachawks won during these 100 days, whatever lol.
He is celebrating by focusing on his sons and when asked about two hundred days he replied with "yes please" how bad ass! This nut drives and Honda but plays hockey so he's got to be somewhat tough although he says he a little nervous of Bring It On??? Why??? Lmao.... He finds Evil and Mookie to he very inspiring but says he has had more help than he can list out. And in his own words "Overall, I would like to say that I feel like my quit has been blessed. There has been so much good karma and good signs. I.e. the Blackhawks winning the Cup and the birth of my 2nd on Day 97 and my oldest's 2nd birthday on day 100!" I quit with you, Erussell.

[Kubrick]

Hey guys,
I have a couple questions:

(1) When can I add a photo to my profile?  I tried doing it but it said I don't have permission for this.
(2)  How do I add a link to my Intro Page on my signature?  I tried doing it by cutting and pasting the web address but it doesn't work when you click on it in my signature.
(3)  Does anyone know a good herbal dip that closely resembles the texture and feel of skoal long cut?  I am yet to find anything close. 

Thanks guys,
Quitting with you all day every day!

- Blackhawks

Looks like your first question was already answered.

For #2 - go to "My Controls" then to Edit Signature.

then you'll need to use board tags to add the URL like so:
Code: Select all

Code: [Select]

[url=http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=8308]Blackhawk's sweet into[/url]Which will end up looking like this:
Blackhawk's sweet into


For 3, I think Smokey Mountain wintergreen is probably the closest feel to long cut.

[Evil_Won]

Hey guys,
I have a couple questions:

(1) When can I add a photo to my profile? I tried doing it but it said I don't have permission for this.
(2) How do I add a link to my Intro Page on my signature? I tried doing it by cutting and pasting the web address but it doesn't work when you click on it in my signature.
(3) Does anyone know a good herbal dip that closely resembles the texture and feel of skoal long cut? I am yet to find anything close.

Thanks guys,
Quitting with you all day every day!

- Blackhawks

For the pic, have you tried? 1) click on your name right under the black banner. 2) Click "avatar options". 3) if the pic you want to use is on your hard drive click on the browse button under the "your image avatars" header. 4) you should be able to figure the rest out.

As for the fake, being as we are from Chicago I will tell you that is is next to impossible to find. I had to drive to a Mom N' Pop smoke shop down in Lansing to find fake. No Walmart around her carries any.

I used Kodiak or Skoal Long Cut and nothing fake was close. All of the fakes were too waxy or too sweet. The Oregon Mint Snff Co mint snuff pouches actually have a strong kick and will burn. I keep a can in the car "just in case". I realized that since finding fake was difficult I was going to go without it. I used a ton of seeds and candy, and stuffed wet green tea bags in there to fill the void. That helped on the commutes to/from work.

Keep digging. It gets better.

[Blackhawks]

Hey guys,
I have a couple questions:

(1) When can I add a photo to my profile? I tried doing it but it said I don't have permission for this.
(2) How do I add a link to my Intro Page on my signature? I tried doing it by cutting and pasting the web address but it doesn't work when you click on it in my signature.
(3) Does anyone know a good herbal dip that closely resembles the texture and feel of skoal long cut? I am yet to find anything close.

Thanks guys,
Quitting with you all day every day!

- Blackhawks

[Evil_Won]

Good work there Blackhawks. I was the same way. The first few days were relatively easy as I was psyched to be quit. Then, once the drug was out of my system the oral fixation thing kicked in. For me, that's the hard battle.

I don't know your specific routine, but for me, I found the shortest distance between home and work. No more joy-riding around with the only purpose to dip. I kept seeds at work, in my bag, and in the car. Fake stuff, which I didn't like, in my bag and car "just in case". Hard candy in a dish on my desk and a huge bag of Atomic Fireballs in my car. A case of Le Croix carbonated water in the car. Toothpicks and floosers in my car. And of course, lots of phone numbers in my phone (most important).

Seems to be a good number of local quitters around here now. Rob1985 (June 13) is near Wheaton, CBB (your quit bro) is near Elmhurst. Be need to get together ASAP to watch a game.

[Blackhawks]

Ok, I'm on Day 3 and hanging in there, but now the real challenge begins. Today is my first work day of my quit. The weekends are much easier for me as I am with my wife and kid mostly and not triggered as much. The work day presents many more triggers like driving in the car alone. The commute this morning wasn't so bad....had my coffee and my jolly ranchers. Was mildly craving but got through it fine. I heard someone on here saying we should try and reduce our caffeine intake. Why is this?

I will try and respond to many of the posts here. Thanks again to all of you for taking the time to offer me support, advice and words of wisdom:

Eric From Pittsburgh - Blackhawks looking pretty dominant. Sid the Kid trying to fight Chara? Yeah, that's gonna work!

Evil Won - I'm in Glenview. Don't know if I'm ready for alcohol yet as it's a trigger for me, but would love to have you as a member of my local support network. Will check my inbox for your number.

Jake Frawley - Glad I helped turn around your day. You and everyone else here has helped to put me in a pretty good mood over this quit. This place is pretty inspiring.

Traumagnet - Will PM you for digits. Thanks for caring!

[traumagnet]

Also, thank you to those of you that offered your numbers.  Will take note of them and try to reach out soon.

Not busting your hump but call those guys now! (especially me)

Establish safety lines early and keep them open (used often) No one is an island here - you close yourself off and bad things happen.

listen to the vet here get yourself some numbers...it may seem weird to call a total stranger but I tell ya SRANS called me out of the blue when I was trapped in a fog and helped me out...if you need my number PM me. We survive together we sink as individuals...not to be cliché united we stand divided we fall.

[Erussell]

Awesome! I quit with you bro, I am addicted to quitting.