It sounds like most of you woke-up one day, randomly decided to quit, threw out your stash and never looked back.
Can only speak for myself and no, it wasn't that random. I went for the regular 6 monthly dental check-up and cleaning. Each time I feared that I would get the announcement that I had cancer. I was convinced each cleaning would result in "the" day, it wasn't. My dipping was never mentioned.
It wasn't until my appointment on 10/10/12, a day that I felt fucking great. Mouth, teeth, gums and everything else felt great. Cancer? No way. Guess what? That was the day my dentist told me he saw "cellular changes", that it "didn't look good
at all", etc.
I had wanted to quit every day for 15 of the 16 years that I dipped. Truth was I wasn't ready to be "man enough" and fight like never before. I too have a wife and 2 girls (5 and 7) and feared for their futures every day. I was weak then.
Well, my dentist scared the fuck out of me that day. I sat shell-shocked in my car for quite a bit. Didn't cry, didn't ask "why me". I knew the day was coming and that day was 10/10/12. It was no surprise. Thankfully, I was then scared enough to quit and even went back to the denstist for a cancer screening after hitting the HOF and as my dentist said, "looks normal, it's amazing how the body can heal itself". I was lucky. Turns out that cdaniels was lucky too but he had you have a chunk of his tongue cut out and examined. Ready for a dose of reality? Read
THIS. Just scroll down a few pages to get to the part where he talks about feeling the amount of blood pouring out of his tongue as they cut and the ensuing panic attack.
Did I celebrate missing cancer by throwing in a fatty? No, but I honestly wanted to. But I can't. I'm an addict. Was then, am today, and will be tomorrow. That's the sad truth. Do what you want, when you want. Find the final motivation that will push you to quit or don't. Your fate. Your decision.
I will alter my offer. If you'd like to meet for a beer or two and discuss this addiction thing in person, let me know. Check your inbox (1) for my number. Sometimes meeting someone face to face that has been in your exact situation and understands can help a great deal. I'm on the west side. Where are you?