Welcome aboard, jcuv. I think it's fantastic that Curt Schilling's interview had precisely the impact for you that it was intended to: provoke active nicotine users to wake up and sever the chain before it's too late. Despite the fact that it was the second national interview where he minced his words on smokeless tobacco's place in MLB and his overall stance on confronting this as a true public health crisis, it was powerful nevertheless to see him relate his firsthand accounts of radiation treatments for his oral cancer.
But alas, Curt's not here and you are. Curt's stories were sobering to be sure. A few months prior to that, Tony Gwynn died after a relatively short battle with salivary gland cancer that had spread. Both events spurred a temporary increase in new members joining the KTC ranks - spooked by recent baseball legends that proved to be the same mere mortals as the rest of us where nicotine is involved.
I'm glad that watching the interview was the call to action for you, but from now on you need to focus on other reasons - selfish reasons for keeping and protecting your quit. Deep down, we all knew even during the absolute peak of our usage that very, very bad things eventually come from packing cat turds in our lips. Yet, we would continue to do it anyway. That fear is fleeting; on the wagon or off. Use the fear of disease and disfigurement as a guide to reinforce your quit, but also keep other factors in mind such as complete and total freedom from slavery to a can at the forefront of your mind. Truly acknowledge and accept that you are an addict and that you will ALWAYS be an addict. The only other distinction being whether you are a using addict or a recovering addict. Learn, understand, and respect the depths of hell the nic bitch will put you through in order to try and get you to cave. After 6 days, I think you've got a pretty good idea of that by now.
Most importantly - don't try to quit and stay quit alone. KTC has a very successful and proven formula: Accountability + Brotherhood = Success. I see you've already posted roll so you've got a jumpstart on the accountability part. Posting roll is the cornerstone of KTC and your solemn promise not to use nicotine in any form for the entire day. Do this every single day, and do it first thing each day. The Brotherhood piece comes down to you and your proactiveness with reaching out to your fellow quit brothers for support, encouragement,accountability, etc. There truly is safety in numbers, so the more numbers of quit brothers you have, the safer your quit will be. I'd be more than happy to give you mine.
Stick close to KTC and build up your support network as much as you can during these early days. You will be through the worst of it very soon, and path of recovering nicotine addict that lies ahead of you is well-worn.
