Author Topic: davemo  (Read 14724 times)

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Offline traumagnet

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Re: davemo
« Reply #40 on: July 07, 2013, 04:43:00 PM »
Quote from: jake
Quote from: davemo
Giving an update after 17 days in. Overall, the quit has been manageable, though I get slammed with craves that penetrate all the way down to my gut and I moan with despair. It seems like the cravings have gotten worse and/or more frequent recently. Maybe the nic bitch thought I was just taking a few days off but got concerned when it seemed like I might actually be quitting. She's come back to get her lost sheep.

On the plus side, I feel like I have a structure that will keep me in quit mode. I'm doing the roll call everyday and I've been keeping in touch with other quitters via PM. I got called out by one of them for reminiscing too much which gave me a new perspective on how to deal with the quit. I'm going to follow the advice.

Additionally, I'm experiencing all the well-documented benefits of quitting. I don't have to deal with having shit in my mouth all day with all the rigmarole attached to it. I don't get the nic pisses throughout the day and just drink water and have actual real pisses. I don't buy all that shit everyday and have actually kept unspent cash in my wallet for several days in a row. I don't need to hide anything from my wife, my mouth feels clean, and I save more time in the day than I had ever expected.

The last thing I'll mention is also a question. I have been brimming with energy the past couple weeks. It is borderline bizarre. I've been a human dynamo getting lots of stuff done, feeling motivated and focused, etc. My question, then is, am I experiencing a nervous reaction to the loss of my dipping? I've heard stories of people who quit any sort of addiction and they respond with obsessive behavior, a focus on something else potentially addictive, etc.; anything to mask the burden of a quit.  OR, is this a new normal where my energy should have been all along? I've been poisoning myself for years, so I must have pushed my energy level down after so much abuse. Is this the new me?  I hope so, because it feels great.

Okay, in the meantime, I quit today, I will get up and quit tomorrow. All the rest will come as it should.  Later quitters.
If it feels great without nic in your system then I would call it good! When have we ever thought that having more energy and being productive was a bad thing? I would embrace it and run with it! Feels good to be Nic free doesn't it?!?!
Ya I have heard that too but swapping an addiction that can kill you for one that can prolong your life seems like an easy choice for me. You prolly have more energy because physiologically you body can carry more oxygen there for more juice. Same as people w sleep apnea get them a cpap machine n they become dynamos. I am w Jake if u feel good and are kicking ass not a lot wrong w that. My suggestion to you is I think you are jonseing because u feel good and are more scared of the unknown than known... in which case burn the bridge and the fucking piers too. Embrace your new energy level its the reward for removing the poison. Look at my thread day 75 I tested my quit body and went from the couch to a 5 k w no training. My body could carry more o2 so i could run w my sons.
Complacency sucks, one moment of it is the difference between being a user and a quitter....OIB

"Lean into the fall my friends, life can be amazing without nicotine. It's just a matter of choice." sM

"Endeavor to persevere."Chief Dan George "The Outlaw Josey Wales".

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Offline jake frawley

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Re: davemo
« Reply #39 on: July 07, 2013, 03:01:00 PM »
Quote from: davemo
Giving an update after 17 days in. Overall, the quit has been manageable, though I get slammed with craves that penetrate all the way down to my gut and I moan with despair. It seems like the cravings have gotten worse and/or more frequent recently. Maybe the nic bitch thought I was just taking a few days off but got concerned when it seemed like I might actually be quitting. She's come back to get her lost sheep.

On the plus side, I feel like I have a structure that will keep me in quit mode. I'm doing the roll call everyday and I've been keeping in touch with other quitters via PM. I got called out by one of them for reminiscing too much which gave me a new perspective on how to deal with the quit. I'm going to follow the advice.

Additionally, I'm experiencing all the well-documented benefits of quitting. I don't have to deal with having shit in my mouth all day with all the rigmarole attached to it. I don't get the nic pisses throughout the day and just drink water and have actual real pisses. I don't buy all that shit everyday and have actually kept unspent cash in my wallet for several days in a row. I don't need to hide anything from my wife, my mouth feels clean, and I save more time in the day than I had ever expected.

The last thing I'll mention is also a question. I have been brimming with energy the past couple weeks. It is borderline bizarre. I've been a human dynamo getting lots of stuff done, feeling motivated and focused, etc. My question, then is, am I experiencing a nervous reaction to the loss of my dipping? I've heard stories of people who quit any sort of addiction and they respond with obsessive behavior, a focus on something else potentially addictive, etc.; anything to mask the burden of a quit. OR, is this a new normal where my energy should have been all along? I've been poisoning myself for years, so I must have pushed my energy level down after so much abuse. Is this the new me? I hope so, because it feels great.

Okay, in the meantime, I quit today, I will get up and quit tomorrow. All the rest will come as it should. Later quitters.
If it feels great without nic in your system then I would call it good! When have we ever thought that having more energy and being productive was a bad thing? I would embrace it and run with it! Feels good to be Nic free doesn't it?!?!

Offline davemo

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Re: davemo
« Reply #38 on: July 07, 2013, 01:22:00 PM »
Giving an update after 17 days in. Overall, the quit has been manageable, though I get slammed with craves that penetrate all the way down to my gut and I moan with despair. It seems like the cravings have gotten worse and/or more frequent recently. Maybe the nic bitch thought I was just taking a few days off but got concerned when it seemed like I might actually be quitting. She's come back to get her lost sheep.

On the plus side, I feel like I have a structure that will keep me in quit mode. I'm doing the roll call everyday and I've been keeping in touch with other quitters via PM. I got called out by one of them for reminiscing too much which gave me a new perspective on how to deal with the quit. I'm going to follow the advice.

Additionally, I'm experiencing all the well-documented benefits of quitting. I don't have to deal with having shit in my mouth all day with all the rigmarole attached to it. I don't get the nic pisses throughout the day and just drink water and have actual real pisses. I don't buy all that shit everyday and have actually kept unspent cash in my wallet for several days in a row. I don't need to hide anything from my wife, my mouth feels clean, and I save more time in the day than I had ever expected.

The last thing I'll mention is also a question. I have been brimming with energy the past couple weeks. It is borderline bizarre. I've been a human dynamo getting lots of stuff done, feeling motivated and focused, etc. My question, then is, am I experiencing a nervous reaction to the loss of my dipping? I've heard stories of people who quit any sort of addiction and they respond with obsessive behavior, a focus on something else potentially addictive, etc.; anything to mask the burden of a quit. OR, is this a new normal where my energy should have been all along? I've been poisoning myself for years, so I must have pushed my energy level down after so much abuse. Is this the new me? I hope so, because it feels great.

Okay, in the meantime, I quit today, I will get up and quit tomorrow. All the rest will come as it should. Later quitters.

Offline davemo

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Re: davemo
« Reply #37 on: June 24, 2013, 01:14:00 PM »
Yep, all the hiding spots. I still find dried up tins in the garage inside a shoe or something pathetic like that. I also noticed how empty my pocket was today when I went to the car.

As for trust with the wife, I haven't shown her my hiding spots since it's so embarrassing, but I do just tell her outright that I'm not chewing today so that she doesn't have to feel like she has to ask me. She doesn't want to nag, but I don't want her to wonder either, so I break the silence and volunteer it.

I saw another comment in another thread, forgot who said it, but he was talking about how he was embarrassed to keep buying chew from the same cashier at a store all the time and that he had to change places from time to time. God, so funny. I had a regular rotation and even got to know the cashier's shifts so that I could avoid people for certain intervals of time. Holy crap is all this pathetic!!!

Offline Mthomas3824

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Re: davemo
« Reply #36 on: June 24, 2013, 01:03:00 PM »
Quote from: traumagnet
Quote from: davemo
Had a funny thing happen to me this weekend. My wife walked over to me and stuffed a couple movie coupons into my pocket. I had a momentary panic because I'm used to concealing my tin in that particular pocket from her. I thought she had me nailed. Then I realized that there wasn't a damn tin in there anymore. I'm not used to being innocent or, you know, normal, yet. What a relief to be, though.

The cravings are by no means gone yet. I have some desperate moments, but I said I wouldn't, so I won't. I'm finally seeing the value of roll call. Would have given up already.
took me weeks to quit reaching for my tin or feeling for it. its a good thing to not to have to remember anymore. Keep your crave kit close...gums seeds whatever you gotta put in your cake hole to keep dip out of it.

PM me if you need anything
Dave,

Man does that bring back memories. I finally one day, after a dried out, year old tin was discovered in my golf bag....I showed my wife all the secret places I hid my tins. From car hiding spots, golf bag, pockets, top of entertainment center. It even surprised me how many spots I had.

If she ever suspects or needs to validate my quit, she has every right and I want her to go around to these places and think as I would. I am quit and this would be a support for me and therapeutic validation to her. I authorized it so she was granted permission to go about this and not feel like she was violating trusts.

She trusts me more, my paranoia diminished and that action was just another statement in my war with Nicotine. Its over. The other way I lost that paranoia was just staying quit. I have nothing to worry about because I am not using, I am not deceiving, hiding or denying.

Truly and no need to say this if it wasn't true today. The burden of my addiction is so much easier quit then when I wasn't.

Stay quit it isn't an easy path or course to begin but it does get to a point where it is.
Quit And Be Free

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Offline kkljinc

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Re: davemo
« Reply #35 on: June 24, 2013, 12:51:00 PM »
Quote from: traumagnet
Quote from: davemo
Had a funny thing happen to me this weekend. My wife walked over to me and stuffed a couple movie coupons into my pocket. I had a momentary panic because I'm used to concealing my tin in that particular pocket from her. I thought she had me nailed. Then I realized that there wasn't a damn tin in there anymore. I'm not used to being innocent or, you know, normal, yet. What a relief to be, though.

The cravings are by no means gone yet. I have some desperate moments, but I said I wouldn't, so I won't. I'm finally seeing the value of roll call. Would have given up already.
took me weeks to quit reaching for my tin or feeling for it. its a good thing to not to have to remember anymore. Keep your crave kit close...gums seeds whatever you gotta put in your cake hole to keep dip out of it.

PM me if you need anything
Every day for over 8000 days my morning routine, was check left pocket..Money Clip..Check..Back Pocket....Cell Phone check.....right pocket tin...check...

I do it every day now as well, force of habit, right pocket now contains my HOF coin. It's worth it.

Offline LionHeartedGirl

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Re: davemo
« Reply #34 on: June 24, 2013, 12:50:00 PM »
Quote from: Sage
Love what you wrote Dave. The nic bitch said the same stuff to me 174 days ago. I really hated the thought of never dipping again. Don't worry, though, you just have to quit for the next 24 hours. I didn't revel in my quit until at least Day 50. Now, I AM grateful everyday to be quit and I can guarantee you will be to. The "last little chew" wouldn't make today's quit easier. BTW, there are a lot of things that taste better than death...just saying. You CAN do this Dave.

I read what you wrote yesterday and in my opinion you should be texting at least one person and hopefully more everyday. The phone numbers are support along the journey...not just for emergencies.

Read the cancer stories to remind you of one of the biggest reasons why you are quitting.

Finally, make sure you hit chat...mostly to keep you mind off of chew and the bonus is you make a few friends, too.

You are fighting for your life right now! Do it one minute at a time.
This is so true Sage!

I send out and receive several texts everyday... Just quick "Good to be quit with you!" texts. Takes minimal effort but it keeps a line if communication open that I may need one day. If you don't open that line of communication on your strong days you sure as hell won't do it on your weak days.

Get a phone number today and use it. If you're not sure who to reach out to start in your quit group. Come to chat. Check your pm's. you probably already have a number or two waiting for you. Use them.
QUIT LIKE A GIRL!

Quit Date: 5/23/13
HOF: 8/30/13

Offline traumagnet

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Re: davemo
« Reply #33 on: June 24, 2013, 12:33:00 PM »
Quote from: davemo
Had a funny thing happen to me this weekend. My wife walked over to me and stuffed a couple movie coupons into my pocket. I had a momentary panic because I'm used to concealing my tin in that particular pocket from her. I thought she had me nailed. Then I realized that there wasn't a damn tin in there anymore. I'm not used to being innocent or, you know, normal, yet. What a relief to be, though.

The cravings are by no means gone yet. I have some desperate moments, but I said I wouldn't, so I won't. I'm finally seeing the value of roll call. Would have given up already.
took me weeks to quit reaching for my tin or feeling for it. its a good thing to not to have to remember anymore. Keep your crave kit close...gums seeds whatever you gotta put in your cake hole to keep dip out of it.

PM me if you need anything
Complacency sucks, one moment of it is the difference between being a user and a quitter....OIB

"Lean into the fall my friends, life can be amazing without nicotine. It's just a matter of choice." sM

"Endeavor to persevere."Chief Dan George "The Outlaw Josey Wales".

MY HOF speech

Offline davemo

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Re: davemo
« Reply #32 on: June 24, 2013, 12:28:00 PM »
Had a funny thing happen to me this weekend. My wife walked over to me and stuffed a couple movie coupons into my pocket. I had a momentary panic because I'm used to concealing my tin in that particular pocket from her. I thought she had me nailed. Then I realized that there wasn't a damn tin in there anymore. I'm not used to being innocent or, you know, normal, yet. What a relief to be, though.

The cravings are by no means gone yet. I have some desperate moments, but I said I wouldn't, so I won't. I'm finally seeing the value of roll call. Would have given up already.

Offline jbradley

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Re: davemo
« Reply #31 on: June 23, 2013, 01:06:00 PM »
Quote from: davemo
3) It seems unfathomable that you will quit permanently. Think about that man, you'll never take another dip? C'mon, that's ludicrous.
You have gotten some good advice here so far. I am going to add my 2 cents and remind you that we do not do forever here. One Day At A Time. Yesterday is already done and can not be changed (however do not totally forget it as history tends to repeat itself if you do) Tomorrow is just a dream, no reason to worry about tomorrow. Today I can control my decision to post roll, choose to honor my word, and be quit.

Offline Sage

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Re: davemo
« Reply #30 on: June 23, 2013, 03:02:00 AM »
Love what you wrote Dave. The nic bitch said the same stuff to me 174 days ago. I really hated the thought of never dipping again. Don't worry, though, you just have to quit for the next 24 hours. I didn't revel in my quit until at least Day 50. Now, I AM grateful everyday to be quit and I can guarantee you will be to. The "last little chew" wouldn't make today's quit easier. BTW, there are a lot of things that taste better than death...just saying. You CAN do this Dave.

I read what you wrote yesterday and in my opinion you should be texting at least one person and hopefully more everyday. The phone numbers are support along the journey...not just for emergencies.

Read the cancer stories to remind you of one of the biggest reasons why you are quitting.

Finally, make sure you hit chat...mostly to keep you mind off of chew and the bonus is you make a few friends, too.

You are fighting for your life right now! Do it one minute at a time.

Offline Dlee3

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Re: davemo
« Reply #29 on: June 23, 2013, 02:25:00 AM »
Quote from: davemo
Had a good day for the most part. Day #4. But it's been getting harder the last few hours. So far, the evenings have been the toughest. Not sure why since my dip distribution used to be pretty equal throughout the day. I said this a day or two ago where I get this craving that grips me for an hour or more straight. I've got a rough one going now. All the head games are in full force and I've got a headache, which is not normal. My gums are throbbing, too. Hearing the nic bitch say stuff like:

1) Well, you decided to quit abruptly. You should have at least finished that last can. Just think, you could have that last bit! That's the problem. You weren't really ready to quit yet. It's okay, give yourself a break. You're not perfect. You can always quit again.

2) There are people on this site who are glorifying and reveling in their quit, but you are timid. Maybe you just aren't sure. Maybe you don't have it in you.

3) It seems unfathomable that you will quit permanently. Think about that man, you'll never take another dip? C'mon, that's ludicrous.

4) That taste is so good. There is nothing that even comes close.

Arrrgh. Tough night. I won't cave, but I'm feeling the suck. I've got names and numbers if I need them. Meanwhile, I just need to chill and get through the next few minutes, get to bed, and do roll call first thing.
Welcome to your new life. Might as well enjoy it. It's possible, I promise.

Offline davemo

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Re: davemo
« Reply #28 on: June 23, 2013, 02:16:00 AM »
Had a good day for the most part. Day #4. But it's been getting harder the last few hours. So far, the evenings have been the toughest. Not sure why since my dip distribution used to be pretty equal throughout the day. I said this a day or two ago where I get this craving that grips me for an hour or more straight. I've got a rough one going now. All the head games are in full force and I've got a headache, which is not normal. My gums are throbbing, too. Hearing the nic bitch say stuff like:

1) Well, you decided to quit abruptly. You should have at least finished that last can. Just think, you could have that last bit! That's the problem. You weren't really ready to quit yet. It's okay, give yourself a break. You're not perfect. You can always quit again.

2) There are people on this site who are glorifying and reveling in their quit, but you are timid. Maybe you just aren't sure. Maybe you don't have it in you.

3) It seems unfathomable that you will quit permanently. Think about that man, you'll never take another dip? C'mon, that's ludicrous.

4) That taste is so good. There is nothing that even comes close.

Arrrgh. Tough night. I won't cave, but I'm feeling the suck. I've got names and numbers if I need them. Meanwhile, I just need to chill and get through the next few minutes, get to bed, and do roll call first thing.

Online worktowin

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Re: davemo
« Reply #27 on: June 21, 2013, 09:04:00 PM »
Quote from: Coach
Quote from: davemo
I have a question now after 3 days in. So, I'm going nuts, mostly from a mental aspect. I don't have any serious physical symptoms. I was in a big fog Day 1, but now, I feel ok.  I get very strong urges to dip, some lasting an hour or two straight, it seems.  My hands are restless and I have nervous energy, etc. etc.... BUT, it feels manageable so far.

Last night, I was watching the Heat-Spurs game and had an urge just about the entire game that was quite strong. However, I was at home with no hidden stash from the wife, nor did I have any desire to leave and buy some. It seemed pointless.  I didn't even feel the need when I went to work the next morning. (Don't get me wrong, the urge to dip did not die!)

So the question is related to when you need to call someone here in the community. Right now, it would feel odd calling someone to discuss my situation despite the many honorable and appreciated offers I've received. I definitely feel miserable, but when do the rest of you call out for help? Am I just basking in innocence still, not realizing that holy hell is around the corner?  If I did call, what type of stuff do you guys say?  I don't know. I'm just in this weird state which sucks but is manageable. Do I just stick with "one day at a time" and not worry about it for now?
Reach out to anyone and everyone that offers up their contact info. Let me ask you this: Why not? It can only strengthen your quit.
Call if you need to or want to. Text. Pm. Whatever. The support is here if you need it or just want it. Thousands of people. One goal. Pretty cool. You've got my number and I'm sure countless others. When you need us, we will be here.

Many if not most of the feelings you are experiencing are physical withdrawals right now. Those should be moving on pretty quickly. Drink a lot of water. Get on a treadmill. Then drink more water. Hang tough bud. Above all else, just remember... You gave your word to yourself and all of us that today is off the table.

See you on the roll tomorrow!

Offline Coach Steve

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Re: davemo
« Reply #26 on: June 21, 2013, 08:11:00 PM »
Quote from: davemo
I have a question now after 3 days in. So, I'm going nuts, mostly from a mental aspect. I don't have any serious physical symptoms. I was in a big fog Day 1, but now, I feel ok. I get very strong urges to dip, some lasting an hour or two straight, it seems. My hands are restless and I have nervous energy, etc. etc.... BUT, it feels manageable so far.

Last night, I was watching the Heat-Spurs game and had an urge just about the entire game that was quite strong. However, I was at home with no hidden stash from the wife, nor did I have any desire to leave and buy some. It seemed pointless. I didn't even feel the need when I went to work the next morning. (Don't get me wrong, the urge to dip did not die!)

So the question is related to when you need to call someone here in the community. Right now, it would feel odd calling someone to discuss my situation despite the many honorable and appreciated offers I've received. I definitely feel miserable, but when do the rest of you call out for help? Am I just basking in innocence still, not realizing that holy hell is around the corner? If I did call, what type of stuff do you guys say? I don't know. I'm just in this weird state which sucks but is manageable. Do I just stick with "one day at a time" and not worry about it for now?
Reach out to anyone and everyone that offers up their contact info. Let me ask you this: Why not? It can only strengthen your quit.
Make Your Decision