Ahhhh, a good day!

[dchogs]

AG,

way to have a plan and enact that plan. you used the tools and got past it.

nice fucking work.

strengthened my quit on what is going to be a stressful day for me. thanks, brother.

[Wild_Bill]

Ag, you're doing great, bro. Keep up the good quit.

[AgLawyer]

Ag, I was somewhere on site when you first showed up and I've followed your progress closely. I am proud to be quit with you. I may have been quit a day or two more than you but watching your diligence and hard work has strengenthed my quit. Thank you, and keep up the amazing work you have going on.

Thanks, Luby - the encouraging words are much appreciated. I, too, am proud to be quit with you!

Paul

[luby]

Ag, I was somewhere on site when you first showed up and I've followed your progress closely. I am proud to be quit with you. I may have been quit a day or two more than you but watching your diligence and hard work has strengenthed my quit. Thank you, and keep up the amazing work you have going on.

[LLCope]

Ag,

The third day blows--the third week is the worst!!!!! and you will have at least a couple funks in the third month. There is something about the 3's. That seems to be the trend for most quitters.

On my 15th or 16th day, I was sitting at my desk and had what can only be described as a fucking panic attack because of a major, major crave. It was so bad I got up and went home at 1pm.

It is all psychological, but remember, the brain is craving and giving you real physical sensations--mental craves give real physical sensations that feel as real as the first 4 days as the triggers pop up------Nervousness in your stomach---fatigue, anxiety etc. The good news is you only have to go through the third week once.

Be easy on yourself and you will make it through. The Craves will weaken with time---sometimes it is two steps back one step forward, but trust me they will weaken.

LL

[AgLawyer]

So I just finished reading a post from Syndrome - never talked to the guy but stumbled across his post reflecting on his 1,000 days quit. Very wise words and I'm going to take them to heart. As such...

Today sucked. Days 1-7 was painful, physically and mentally. Days 8-14 seemed to not be so bad. I was busy and while I was battling the inner beast I felt pretty damn good that I was making progress in my quit after being a prisoner to it for 20-21 years.

Then today rolled around - Day 15. It started out like all the others between 8 and 14 but as the day progressed it felt different. Work was extra stressful today as difficulties arose with regard to some cases and difficult opposing counsel. As a trial lawyer those kind of things are pretty much status quo - lawyers can be pricks and cases aren't always easy. What was different before was that I had convinced myself that popping in a fat dip was what I needed to relax - the nicotine devil in my head and I were living in harmony and she would be there for me to relax. So now that I have banished that little demon, there was no crutch for me. My stress then compounded because I was craving - probably worse than I have since starting my quit. I walked around the building - got my head in order - yes still craving but acknowledged this was all mental.

I get home and still feeling it. I even told my wife, "I want a dip so bad" - something a ninja dipper like myself NEVER would have said prior to being quit. I have a little text message exchange with a fellow quit brother (thanks JTRicher) and I start to get my head in order. I hop on chat for a few minutes for a little more support. Still feeling it I run to the gym for a late night workout - figure I'll sweat out the cravings. Well finally things came back to normal - well, at least the normalcy that I had on day 14.

While at the gym I was thinking how freaking awesome this site is and the support a freaking weak ass nicotine fiend like me can get. Without it, I wouldn't have survived the cravings today - hell I wouldn't have made it past day 2.

Tomorrow is going to be a better day. It's only psychological. My body does not require nicotine or tobacco. The addiction is mind fucking me and I know it - just can't forget it.

Thanks Syndrome - I feel better already.

[AgLawyer]

AG, I was also a ninja, like yourself. For taking a 600 mile road trip by yourself for two days and not dipping after only 13 days quit ... you are my hero.

I quit over 40 days ago, but have purposely not gone on any long drives yet. I think maybe your balls are made of some space-age titanium-alloy, not just steel.

Ha! Thanks man. I'll admit it wasn't super easy but it also wasn't terribly hard. The biggest challenge was on my way home because I had a long stressful day of meetings and was really not looking forward to the 300 mile drive home. To cure any possible diversions I hopped on the site for some support. For the drive from home to my destination the day before I treated it a bit as a therapeutic thing. I actually made a point to stop more often - stopped at 3 convenience stores to grab a drink or something - I wanted to stand at the counter and look at Grizzly and his butt buddies and tell him to fuck off to his face - and I did just that. Yes I looked like a lunatic to the cashier but it felt good and after explaining that I was liberating myself they told me that it was good to not use it (one cashier told me about a customer who always stops in there and who is missing part of his lip).

So my advice (well, advice of a mere 14 day quit moron) is to fucking jump in the car and just do it. Do what I did, stop at a typical gas station where you normally would and scan the cans look for your previous favorite, tell him to fuck off and walk off with a smile and pat yourself on the back.

Paul

[chunkles]

AG, I was also a ninja, like yourself. For taking a 600 mile road trip by yourself for two days and not dipping after only 13 days quit ... you are my hero.

I quit over 40 days ago, but have purposely not gone on any long drives yet. I think maybe your balls are made of some space-age titanium-alloy, not just steel.

[AgLawyer]

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. It is reassuing when I hear others went thru the same thing and successful in their quit beyond my measly 12 days. I'm sitting here grabbing a quick bite before I hit the road for a 300 mile drive and wanted a bit of motivation to stay strong so logged in to read some stuff and saw the responses. Just what the doctor ordered. This site rocks!!

There is not one thing "measly" about those 12 days. You have walked through fire. You are tougher than 99% of the people who used tobacco 13 days ago. If I were accustomed to using profanity to make my point, I would say that you are one tough, fornicating, illegitimate offspring of a female Cocker Spaniel, sir, and I can't believe you don't know that, counselor!

Lawyers are humble, Nine.

So very true.

I'll help nine out...

You have gigantic fucking quitter balls you nic bitch couchie grabbing son of a Cocker Spaniel. You have backbone and guts. I'm damn glad you're making your way and making a path for others in the process.

Ok, I'll toss aside the modesty. To be honest, I'm feeling like I'm 10 foot tall and have nuts of steel (oh wait, I really do have nuts of steel) after being quit of this filthy horse shit for 13 days. I just drove 600 miles in the last 2 days on a business trip and spent an evening in a hotel and while, honestly, the thought of dipping did enter my mind on dozens of occasions it never went beyond that - mere blips in my mind, triggers from days of yore, etc.

Later in the evening, after a long day of meetings and preparing for the trip home, I had probably the strongest cRave since my quit - stressful day and several hours alone in the car on the horizon was heaven for this former ninja dipper. Feeling that weakness I hopped onto the website with my trusty iPhone and received the mental health support I needed. You guys rock.

[Souliman]

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. It is reassuing when I hear others went thru the same thing and successful in their quit beyond my measly 12 days. I'm sitting here grabbing a quick bite before I hit the road for a 300 mile drive and wanted a bit of motivation to stay strong so logged in to read some stuff and saw the responses. Just what the doctor ordered. This site rocks!!

There is not one thing "measly" about those 12 days. You have walked through fire. You are tougher than 99% of the people who used tobacco 13 days ago. If I were accustomed to using profanity to make my point, I would say that you are one tough, fornicating, illegitimate offspring of a female Cocker Spaniel, sir, and I can't believe you don't know that, counselor!

Lawyers are humble, Nine.

So very true.

I'll help nine out...

You have gigantic fucking quitter balls you nic bitch couchie grabbing son of a Cocker Spaniel. You have backbone and guts. I'm damn glad you're making your way and making a path for others in the process.

[AgLawyer]

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. It is reassuing when I hear others went thru the same thing and successful in their quit beyond my measly 12 days. I'm sitting here grabbing a quick bite before I hit the road for a 300 mile drive and wanted a bit of motivation to stay strong so logged in to read some stuff and saw the responses. Just what the doctor ordered. This site rocks!!

There is not one thing "measly" about those 12 days. You have walked through fire. You are tougher than 99% of the people who used tobacco 13 days ago. If I were accustomed to using profanity to make my point, I would say that you are one tough, fornicating, illegitimate offspring of a female Cocker Spaniel, sir, and I can't believe you don't know that, counselor!

Lawyers are humble, Nine.

So very true.

[G]

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. It is reassuing when I hear others went thru the same thing and successful in their quit beyond my measly 12 days. I'm sitting here grabbing a quick bite before I hit the road for a 300 mile drive and wanted a bit of motivation to stay strong so logged in to read some stuff and saw the responses. Just what the doctor ordered. This site rocks!!

There is not one thing "measly" about those 12 days. You have walked through fire. You are tougher than 99% of the people who used tobacco 13 days ago. If I were accustomed to using profanity to make my point, I would say that you are one tough, fornicating, illegitimate offspring of a female Cocker Spaniel, sir, and I can't believe you don't know that, counselor!

Lawyers are humble, Nine.

[ninereasons]

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. It is reassuing when I hear others went thru the same thing and successful in their quit beyond my measly 12 days. I'm sitting here grabbing a quick bite before I hit the road for a 300 mile drive and wanted a bit of motivation to stay strong so logged in to read some stuff and saw the responses. Just what the doctor ordered. This site rocks!!

There is not one thing "measly" about those 12 days. You have walked through fire. You are tougher than 99% of the people who used tobacco 13 days ago. If I were accustomed to using profanity to make my point, I would say that you are one tough, fornicating, illegitimate offspring of a female Cocker Spaniel, sir, and I can't believe you don't know that, counselor!

[AgLawyer]

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. It is reassuing when I hear others went thru the same thing and successful in their quit beyond my measly 12 days. I'm sitting here grabbing a quick bite before I hit the road for a 300 mile drive and wanted a bit of motivation to stay strong so logged in to read some stuff and saw the responses. Just what the doctor ordered. This site rocks!!

[LLCope]

Ag,

My current sleeping patterns at 104 days are and were very similar to what Jtricher is describing (thanks for sharing that JT-it helped me).

The poor sleeping patterns are very normal. They will fade for some quickly for others gradually--every quit is different. Just remember this is all part of the healing process that our body and minds are going through. Quitting is a process not a one time event.

Every time we can't sleep--that's healing

Every time we are depressed or anxious--that's healing

Every time we crave--thats' healing

Every time we despair--that's healing

Every time we cry--that's healing(it's ghey to cry--man-up)

Every time we feel pain --that's healing

Every time we don't feel quite like ourselves--that's healing

Every pain is healing!


We heal with every nicotine free day------remember the nicotine addiction caused all this pain/discomfort, it cannot be the solution to the pain if it caused it.

So the solution is to remain nicotine free and heal.

LL