Those of you that know me know that I lost my brother in 2011 of throat cancer. The story is in this introÂ… I think somewhere in here is the fact that I lost my mother to emphysema at 56. So tobacco has directly claimed 2 in my family to date. AnywayÂ….
A couple of years ago my other brother goes to the doctor for a checkupÂ… they find his prostate cancer markers highÂ… They do some tests and give him a clean bill of health.
He went back to the doctors about 6 months ago because he was having pain in his hip. HeÂ’s 51 at this point, so hip pain isnÂ’t so normalÂ… they run some tests and he is stage 4 prostate cancerÂ… metastasized to the bone, hence the hip pain , no cure, chemo and hormone therapy will prolong his life, but eventually this terrible disease will ravage his body, just like it did with my oldest brotherÂ… different type of cancer, same result.
Now prostate cancer may not be the first cancer to come to mind when you think of cancers caused by tobacco, but prostate cancers found in smokers tend to me much more aggressiveÂ… so at the very least, smoking is a contributing factor to the number of days that my brother has to be with his wife. The number of days to hug his children. He has 3: a 21 year old son and two daughters, 16 and 15.
Tonight I went to a family gathering to see my brotherÂ… His hair is thin courtesy of the latest round of chemoÂ… teeth are starting to turn black, also courtesy of chemo. His complexion is pale. His hands shake when he tries to do the simplest of tasks. As much as he puts on his game face, you can tell that the chemo and cancer are knocking the shit out of him. He confessed to me that depression descends on him like a dark cloud as he thinks about the days that are inevitably going to come. When he thinks about the suffering, When he thinks about the hardship his family is going to go through. When he thinks about leaving the 4 people in this world that he loves most of all. His wife, his rockÂ… well she looks tired. She is already grieving inside. I can see it in her eyes. In her tone. They both put on their game face, but it is easy to see what lies beneath.
Know that what has happened to my brother can happen to any one of usÂ… and each day that we choose to continue to use tobacco increases the chances that it will happen to us. Put yourself in my brotherÂ’s shoesÂ… think about what it would be like to come back to the doctors and tell your wife. To know that you are dying and wait until your children are off from school to tell them. To watch them as you tell them that you are dying. To watch them as their eyes well up with tears. To know that you could have made a single decision that would have protected them from all of this painÂ….
The decision to quit, and to stay that way. Never Again - For Any Reason.
