7 days in... Saturday and mind games running me ragged. Urges still bad, but batting them the F back. Been a ninja dipper for so long and having the wife not understand my addiction has now put me in a position where I am now hiding my quit. I don't want to hide it, but I think part of me does. She has heard the promises over the years and will likely think i am full of shit again or wonder what else am I hiding.  Part of me wants her in on it now, but the other part doesn't want to deal with the hassle. Sounds bad when I read that, but i don't know what her reaction will be and I am kind of worried about dealing with it. But I find myself sneaking online to read and chat. Same shit I did all these years only dipping. WTF. This ain't gonna work like this ,I don't think. Feeling like a major asshole. Any advice?
Stop sneaking around... Let her in on the fact you are a week quit. It will explain some of your behavior lately. But most of all it will add an extra layer of accountability. Be proud of the fact you have been quit for 7 days. that is badass, but the battle has just begun. There are more rough spots and ups and downs yet to come in your quit. The mind games have just begun and you need all the ammo in your corner you can get right now. If you work it right you might even get some 'do it' . It is great to feel proud of what you are accomplishing, but it is even better for your other half to be proud of you.
There's a bunch of stuff for spouses to read... Start there. You have to get over the hangups you've been nurturing for years. I thought my wife, well, I honestly didn't know what my wife was gonna do. I didn't want to deal with it BUT... Turns out she's my biggest supporter. She won't ever get it but she supports me and realizes how important this site is to my quit. Stop worrying so much bro... Just do it! 7 days is badass man... That speaks for itself right there!
Agreed...Best thing I ever did was include my wife and kids in my quit. They know what day I am on as good as I do. Tuesday, I made 1 year and they had me a card, candy and took me to dinner. Tell her, and watch your Quit flourish.....QLAFM
I am going to have to agree with all the above knowledge. Yea She may be harsh, but once she realizes your for real she will be very supportive. , she probably knows more than you think anyway.
Spill it Diggler. Tell her what going on and how this time will be different. Show her the site and let her know that not only do you need KTC's support...you need hers. But, be prepared. You've likely lied to her countless times, we all did. She's prolly gonna roll her eyes at you but at least she'll understand why you're being such an ass.
Mrs. Diggler...if you read this, try your best to cut the guy some slack. He is going through hell. Ab..so...LOOT hell. If you are not an addict, you have no clue. Fortunately for him, he has us. We get it. When he's being a prick...don't do what LOOT's ex did...throw $5 at him tell him you "like him better dipping, go get a can" (true story...or close). Politely send him to KTC and tell him to take his shit out on the board. We kinda like it. It's why we are here. It's why we created this place. He's going to be OK, but it will take time. It's not something he can control like a light switch. He's going to go through periods of anxiety, rage, depression and a whole host of other bad shit too. IT's going to be the hardest damned thing he's ever done and likely, one of his proudest accomplishments. Don't feel sorry for him though, he did it to himself. However, unlike starting this addiction, he can't quit by himself. He needs us, and dammit all to hell, we need him. We need him clean just like you do. He'll be a better man for it. That's a promise.
