My name is James and I've been addicted to nicotine since I was 14 years old. Started smoking on weekends, graduated to dipping because I was a jock, but still smoked. I can't think of a day since that I haven't had nicotine in my system. I've been a can a day user for 25 years. Its the first thing I do when I wake up and the last thing I do, before I brush my teeth, at night. In between, I dip whenever I drive alone, when I can behind closed doors at the office, when the wife is away at home. She knows, but hates it. Yes, I'm a toilet dipper. Probably sounds familiar to alot of people on this site. Dipping is a bigger part of my life than I planned it to be when I first took a pinch back in 1989, and I hate it. I've been trying to find the strength to quit for sometime now. Waiting for the perfect time. I've finally decided that the anxiety over quitting is not even close to the anxiety that I feel everyday for putting my life at risk for this crap, and the guilt that I feel for potentially leaving my wife without a husband and my children fatherless because of my vice. I'm sitting here now, paranoid because of this hacking cough and possible lumps on my neck..thinking I probably have throat cancer. Paranoia, guilt and anxiety. What wonderful benefits from my dipping habit! Remodeling my house, living at my in-laws...probably not a great time to quit as I might hulk out and lose it EVEN WITH the nicotine fix right now. I am planning the quit though and welcome any ideas to get through the withdrawal and over coming the oral fixation. I really appreciate your help out there. I'm looking forward to making this change in my life.
