more ab me. So in Dec 2013 i thought i pulled groin @work (I'm a plumber) took MRI weeks later that revealed some swollen lymph nodes and that i had a disease called Avasular Necrosis (AVN) of the hips which was causing my groin pain, blood flow had been cut off to the femoral head (top of hip) and therefore the bone was dead/dying and had collapsed. Being lymph were swollen that issue was more pressing since it could of meant cancer. lymphs were swollen in groin and neck. After ct scans theyfound me to be cancer free thank god but why swollen lymphs? 3 days after xmas i went to ER because i was in so much pain the ER doctor decided to do bloodwork and 1 of which was HIV test i was discharged from ER he said the HIV was only test not back he said if i don't get a call in a week or 2 that no news is good news. in that time i did 2nd CT scan of my neck for the lymphs. in Mid jan my PCP calls me into his office i figure great my CT results came in and thats when he dropped the BOMB he said reason i called you in is your HIV results came back POSITIVE and my CD4 was 157 which is considered AIDSÂ… i was scared to death. However after talking to DR he said nobody dies of HIV/AIDS i just need to take pills everyday which is what I've been doing since then and I'm now "Undetectable" and my cd4 is up to almost 500. Just waiting to get hip surgery now. But as life would have is in Feb my mother passed away from a heart attack just 1 more thing to throw on top of the shit pile that has been my life since DEC. So when i saw a little white pimple on my cheek i decided that 3 major life shakeups were enough for me i didn't need oral cancer to be the 4th thing. So I decided to say fuck you to my can you're not with it
Damn brother....sincerest condolences.
You're doing the right thing though. Coming here to clean yourself of that nicotine crap can only help in dealing with the stuff you're trying to handle. Brace yourself for the SUCK, though, that's coming. As LOOT (3300+ days quit and counting) says, learn from it...remember how bad it SUCKS so you never ever want to go through it again. That makes sense to me.
Proud to be quit with you today, tomorrow, and every damn day after that.
Hang tough brother. It is good to not use tobacco. You're definitely making the right move.
You know man... I'm glad you are here. Many if us have or had issues. The principles of this site are strong and will roll over to other parts of your life. Hip surgery... Sucks. Taking pills.... Sucks. Losing a parent.... Sad and terrible.
I bet Tony Gwynn's family wishes he could be in your shoes.
Yep, I went there. Nicotine is a wicked beast. It takes over your life. It makes you lie, makes you miss commitments. Make excuses. Makes you a liar. And I can say that because every single person on this site has at some point lied to cover their addiction. To win, one day at a time, you gotta be a man of your word. And being a man of your word is contagious. Itsjes your whole life better.
If I can help, let me know. Pm me is you need a number. You can do this. One day at a time.