I'll start this intro by say "Better Late than Never"....today is 08Feb2015 and i've been Quit for 55days. I Quit on 16Dec2014 @ 1100hrs and found KTC that evening...My first 10 days were miserable. I couldn't figure out how to post roll (which irritated me to no end because i thought i was pretty computer savvy), so writing an introduction was the last thing on my mind. Also, i kept telling my self that "Only an Idiot would Quit over Xmas"....my daughter was home from school and my son was home from the Army...so, kids are home, wife is in stage 3 panic - trying to make sure everything is perfect for xmas....and here i am - big, angry, ass hole, who wants to snap the head off something......Finally - xmas is over...everything is settling down...wifey's not pissed at me for whatever....i log on to KTC on 28Dec...first time since my Day 1....there is a message from Mat849 that had been sitting there since my day 1...i read and responded...within an hour, i had another message from Mat849....he passed on some great advise about being quit and the importance of Posting Roll......at the time i didn't really "get" the whole post roll thing....this is what he said "Roll is the most important thing we do here. First thing in the morning promise yourself and everyone here that you will not use nicotine in any form for that day. Wake up the next day and repeat. Quit one day at a time, ODAAT.".....after i read that...i posted rolled ( i'm sure i fucked it up and bumped half a days worth of quitters) and i've been posting roll every morning since.
I started dipping around Feb/March 1986....i credit Skoal/Hawkin/Kodiak for getting me thru Ranger School....shortly after that i graduated to Copenhagen....after i started chewing Copenhagen, there was no going back to anything else....i was chewing 1 to 1.5 cans a day for nearly 29 years....dipped always and everywhere.... I was good at it...i would make a dip plan in my head on how i was going to dip in any given situations. On the plane, graduations, ballet recitals, i was able to dip everywhere. Never much worried about health...Had Cancer in 1993....Lost a nut to testicular cancer... Cancer couldn't kill me then - certainly won't kill me now....i've completed 5 combat tours ( 1 x Haiti in 95, 4 x Afghanistan in 03,05,06,09)....been shot at with rifles, machine guns, mortars, rockets...been blown up...i survived it all.....Copenhagen was with me all the way......
Finally, one day, i woke the fuck up....i'm nearly 52....all i think about is how am i going to dip....if i loose my tin or forget it at home - I'm in a mild panic until i can buy another one.....you think to your self for a minute...that is soo fucked up and wrong....i gotta quit...but how...i go just a couple hours with out dip and my body turns inside out....when i did quit on 16Dec - i wasn't sure how long it would last... i quit cold turkey and thankfully i found KTC that evening.....on day 3 of my quit i went to a hypnotist....can't confirm or deny how much it helped....but i'm pretty sure it didn't hurt....he asked me to make a list of reason i want to quit and triggers.....i called it my Dippers Manifesto....see below
When do I Dip / Triggers
Basically from the time I wake up to the time I go to bedÂ….iÂ’m DippingÂ….only time IÂ’m not dipping is when IÂ’m either sleeping, eating , or fuckingÂ….
Work Day*morningÂ…put in a dip as I leave the house to drive to workÂ…0500am
*at workÂ…at my deskÂ….before the morning callÂ…after the morning callÂ…..after I kick out the crew
*when IÂ’m working on the computerÂ…doing reportsÂ….using the MSOC systemÂ….going thru emailÂ….responding to emailÂ….dipping dipping dipping
*working in the yard at workÂ…moving reelsÂ…inventoryÂ….moving suppliesÂ…moving stuff around I the yard with the BobcatÂ…..anything outside requires a dip
*when IÂ’m in my work truckÂ….visiting crewsÂ….checking on jobsÂ….anytime outside the officeÂ…dipping
*driving home from workÂ…..dip dip dip
*At home….(when I’m not at work)….i’m dipping……after I get up….eat a bit – then dip
*working around the houseÂ….dippingÂ….any home projectÂ….dippingÂ….tinkering in the garageÂ….dipping.. tinkering in the basementÂ…dippingÂ….cleaning the house / laundry / vacuumingÂ…dip dip dip
*working in the yard at homeÂ…..dippingÂ….mowing the yardÂ….dippingÂ…..
*walking to the gymÂ…dippingÂ…after I work outÂ…dipping
*after a mealÂ….DippingÂ…..cleaning up the dishesÂ….dippingÂ…..after dishesÂ…new dipÂ…Â…..
*at home relaxing with my laptop on my lapÂ….dippingÂ….then more dipÂ….unit I go to bed
*watching TVÂ…watching a movieÂ…dip dip dip
*Misc dippingÂ…*shooting gunsÂ… Â….riding motorcycleÂ…..fishingÂ…..must dipÂ…dip dip dipÂ…Â…
*anytime IÂ’m wearing my uniform (army)Â….must have a dipÂ….army = dip
*road tripÂ….gotta dipÂ….longer the driveÂ…the more dip required
*drinking beerÂ…dip dip dip
*movie theaterÂ….on a planeÂ…in a hotelÂ…at the beachÂ…..dip dip dip
*watching sportsÂ…football / hockeyÂ….anythingÂ….TV or LiveÂ…dip dip dip
*shovel snowÂ…snow blowerÂ….dip dip dip
**Any situation where IÂ’m not sleepingÂ….dip dip dip
Why am I quittingÂ…Â…Â…for startersÂ….no one (wife / kids/work) has pushed me to quitÂ….this is all me
*its timeÂ…..started dipping in March 1986Â…..been going strong sinceÂ….anywhere from 1 can a day to 5/7 cans a weekÂ….lets call that 28yrs /9 monthsÂ…that would be 345 months / 1498 week / 10, 490 daysÂ…@ an average of $3 a can over the 28+years at lets just say 5 cans a weekÂ…that would be 1498 weeks x 5 = 7490 cans x 3 = $22,470
*HealthÂ….blood pressure is highÂ…donÂ’t want to go on meds
*cancerÂ….bad bad badÂ….donÂ’t want my face to fall offÂ….want to be kissable
*not all that interested in dying earlyÂ…..watched both my parents die from smoking related issuesÂ….not prettyÂ….you lingerÂ…suffer and linger some moreÂ…..bad way to goÂ….even worse for the family to watch
* may some day have grand kidsÂ…donÂ’tÂ’ want to have to explain what grandpas got in his mouth
*tired of being addictedÂ….need to drop the dependencyÂ….donÂ’t want to plan in my head how IÂ’m gonna dip every time we go somewhere
*most people probably donÂ’t think I can do itÂ….fuck em
*grossÂ….probably not a cool looking as I thought it was
*costÂ….not cheapÂ….$25+ each week
*sometimes I have to go looking for itÂ….if my store doesnÂ’t have itÂ….minor panic unit I find it
*its just badÂ…bad habitÂ…bad addictionÂ….i should know betterÂ…..time to stopÂ….for nobody else but my selfÂ…..if it helps me get laid a little bit more along the wayÂ….even better
**if I start back upÂ….iÂ’m nothing more than a weak little pussyÂ…Â…
QUIT date time: 16Dec2014Â…1100hrs
i have a copy of this in my truck - folded up and stuffed in my visor.....i refer to it often
OK...so theres my late Intro....i hope to refer back to this on day 100 and every other step after that
