Day 84
I watched someone walk into Dec25 today to post up another day 1 after failing to use the tools provided here. They had my number and many other quitters' numbers but only reached out after they decided to cave. I look back on the past and my status of being a retread myself and I have to be honest here and say there are so many quitters on this site who have been through so much worse than I have, and most others have and they have remained quit. See that is the difference here in quitting and stopping. Those who make it through the trials, shitty days, almost losing everything and not knowing if they will come out on the other side, but still never faltering on their quits are the ones who survive here simply because they bought in. They know that nicotine will not solve any of the problems at that moment, so they stick to what they know and that is their promise to themselves and their group.
Losing a battle to a dead plant in a can is a lot more embarrassing today for me and maybe that’s because I have grown and matured. Maybe it’s because I finally realized that I am in control of my actions and also my lack of them! I have learned that caving will never be an option for me again. I can’t betray my brothers and sisters again and most importantly I can’t let myself down. Someone in my group (Ribbons) has a great saying they like to drop “Love yourself enough to quit” and I think that speaks volumes. If you won’t quit or won’t stay quit then you clearly do not love yourself enough to save your own life. We only get one shot at this life, by the time you wished you would’ve quit or stayed on your quit it could be too late. You only have to quit for today, tomorrow can wait. It's today that matters most!