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Offline zacharynelson23

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #17 on: December 09, 2014, 10:43:00 PM »
I've been drinking a load of the quitting kool-aid. I bought every kind of fake stuff and I didn't like any of it. Looks like I'll be sticking to lifesavers, gum, and water. I feel bits of anxiety build up inside of me every now and then followed by dizziness. Can't wait for the physical effects to subside.
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Offline UH60Chief107

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #16 on: December 09, 2014, 05:24:00 AM »
Welcome to the forum bro.

I too am a huge dexter fan so the thread title jumped out at me lol.

I was also a ninja dipper for a majority of my nicotine days. I hadn't thought of it in a while so thank you for refreshing my memory about how much of a slave I was. I remember sitting at home with a wad in, waiting for my wife to come home. Every time I heard a car pass it was a race to the window to see if it was her. Or I would purposely lock the deadbolt on the door so I would have to open it so she could come in, giving me enough time to flush the worm dirt and rinse with listorine. Finally, my wife caught me and she was not happy. I stopped for over 100 days on my own, thought I was cured, and tried one more pinch just to feel it "one more time". That one time turned into a can a day within a week and I was back to ninja dipping. My wife caught me again, and like you mentioned about your wife, she determined it had to be up to me to quit. That is what also led me to KTC. Let my mistake be a lesson, we are addicts so there is never just "one more". Your brain will crave that nicotine like a heroin fiend and will try to rationalize why you should throw in another pinch. Come on here, vent it out, and we will help you through it.

The next few days will be the worst of it. You will enter the fog and feel like crap, but it will pass. You have a whole network of quitters that have experienced everything you will go through so use it to your advantage. Remember, one probem + nicotine = 2 problems. This system has helped thousands and it will help you if you let it. So drink the Kool-aid and let's quit today!
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Sultans-- 'stick' --Nic

Offline Wt57

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #15 on: December 09, 2014, 01:28:00 AM »
Zachary your into is so typical, sooo many of us hid out of embarrassment. Nicotine addiction is one of the top hardest addictions to kick but, thousands of us do it here daily. Your story of your wife catching you over and over and not understanding sounds like my story and finally when I abandon my hiding and lying my wife became my number one support in quitting. After 32 years of lying to her I can look her in the eyes and tell her how my quit is going. Having her trust (which I'm earning) is a great motivator. At about 1 year quit she mostly quit asking about my quit giving me the pleasure of knowing that I was gaining that lost trust. She actually has more faith in my ability to remain clean than I do at 982 days. The only times that I'm 100% sure I will be nicotine free is when my name is on roll call I know I will never violate that promise. That may seem strange to you but as you build the brotherhood with your quit group you will understand (if you take full advantage of the KTC plan). Drink up the quit koolaid is sweet.
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Offline wastepanel

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #14 on: December 08, 2014, 10:30:00 PM »
Quote from: zacharynelson23
Just for future reference. Where do we go to vent or dialogue about cravings or frustration?
Sigh...just kidding.

Feel free to bitcb to your group about the "joys" of quitting. That usually gets you the quickest response and let's you see that they're going through the same shit you are.

If you want a more journal like experience, bitch out here.
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In the end I Surrender, I and I alone accept that I have and always will have a Nicotene ADDICTION. It is my choice to quit, but I can't do it alone. I get to go down this path one time, I want to do it right. I recognize that my word, my integrety to you is on the line and is only as good as my actions. Caving is not an option in this plan-Eafman 7/11

I am not cured. I will quit one day at a time. I will continue to do what works. Posting roll everyday. To do otherwise would be foolish on my part. You can do this-Ready 12/11

To overcome your addiction you must comprehend what it means to fail-Razd 3/12

Theres a lot of people that come here, especially vets, that WANT to be reminded that they are addicts.-Tarpon 6/12

Just as a building starts with architectural drawings. Your daily quit begins with a promise.-Scowick 2/13

Here and now, focused on today, minute by minute, whatever it takes, I promise to all my bros and myself not to become a negative stat and stay quit!-krok 1/15

I want everyone to be quit. Even the assholes.-Probe1957 1/18

Ignoring history or erasing history fixes nothing and leads you inevitably down the same path.-69franx 04/30/2021

Offline zacharynelson23

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #13 on: December 08, 2014, 10:21:00 PM »
Just for future reference. Where do we go to vent or dialogue about cravings or frustration?
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Offline zacharynelson23

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #12 on: December 08, 2014, 09:07:00 PM »
Oh thanks!
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Offline Grizzlyhasclaws

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #11 on: December 08, 2014, 09:01:00 PM »
Change your quit date in your settings. You quit today, not December 9, 2014.
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Offline zacharynelson23

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #10 on: December 08, 2014, 08:59:00 PM »
I must also add that this site is quite confusing. I feel like Hoggle is leading me through the Labyrinth. I will figure it out though.
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Offline zacharynelson23

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #9 on: December 08, 2014, 08:56:00 PM »
I'm glad to see that a couple of you picked up my reference to Dexter. I am so done with this mess. My mouth will be relieved as much as my wife, but I can already feel the "dark passenger," if you will. Just drank two glasses of water. I will make it.
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Offline Candoit

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #8 on: December 08, 2014, 08:53:00 PM »
Zach,

Welcome to the best thing you have done for you in a long time. Everyone of us is on the same journey, but each of us had our "OH SHIT WHAT AM I DOING!?" at different times. Reach out to anyone, and you will be amazed at what happens next.
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There are no circumstances in which using nicotine will improve the outcome.

My journey. The best part it is not over yet.

Offline wastepanel

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #7 on: December 08, 2014, 08:32:00 PM »
Quote from: zacharynelson23
My very last can of dip was just thrown away, marking the beginning of a long journey. I started dipping several years ago, although the exact amount of time is ambiguous, probably due to the effects of this poison. I hid it from my wife for a long time, she caught me, I told her I quit, she caught me again and accepted that me quitting had to be my choice. I hated hiding, peeping through the blinds to make sure she wasn't coming, running to the store for no reason, and taking a long shower just to fill my cravings. I own a small painting business and am so ashamed of my habit that I would look out windows real quick to make sure the owners had not arrived every time I heard a noise. December 11 was my original quit date because that is the day that my wife is having her IUD (birth control) removed so that we can proudly add another soul to our family, which currently consists of her, I, and our beautiful 3 year old daughter. After reading so many experiences on this site, I have decided to expedite my quit date to tomorrow. Therefore, I will be checking into roll call early tomorrow, and I will need some hands to hold during this process. I know that I can do it. During my previous "quits" or "momentary stops", my wife was not very encouraging at all! Mostly because she does not understand this weird addiction. However, this time is different. She seems to empathize what I will be going through and wants to help in any way that she can. I read through the Spousal Support, and will have her look at it as well, for I will need as much support as I can get in the coming months, or days, if you will. I want to thank you all already for the inspiration you have already given me..

Zachary
Nice man and welcome to the site.

Love the show dexter, and love the reference of the dark passenger. While dexter was compelled" to killing things, his father taught him to focus that skill for "good". That's what quitting is. Instead of looking for your next fix...you'll be searching out a life without nicotine.

Post roll. Roll is your promise not to use nicotine today. It is the cornerstone of our quit. It's not the easiest to do initially, but you'll get the hang of it. Don't be afraid to ask questions.

Drink water and plenty of it. Try to limit your caffeine as it is more potent right now. Exercise is your friend.

Most importantly...stay quit man. Quit isn't a decision. It's a series of decisions.
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In the end I Surrender, I and I alone accept that I have and always will have a Nicotene ADDICTION. It is my choice to quit, but I can't do it alone. I get to go down this path one time, I want to do it right. I recognize that my word, my integrety to you is on the line and is only as good as my actions. Caving is not an option in this plan-Eafman 7/11

I am not cured. I will quit one day at a time. I will continue to do what works. Posting roll everyday. To do otherwise would be foolish on my part. You can do this-Ready 12/11

To overcome your addiction you must comprehend what it means to fail-Razd 3/12

Theres a lot of people that come here, especially vets, that WANT to be reminded that they are addicts.-Tarpon 6/12

Just as a building starts with architectural drawings. Your daily quit begins with a promise.-Scowick 2/13

Here and now, focused on today, minute by minute, whatever it takes, I promise to all my bros and myself not to become a negative stat and stay quit!-krok 1/15

I want everyone to be quit. Even the assholes.-Probe1957 1/18

Ignoring history or erasing history fixes nothing and leads you inevitably down the same path.-69franx 04/30/2021

Offline NoMoreCopeBlack

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #6 on: December 08, 2014, 08:29:00 PM »
Quote from: zacharynelson23
Well technically I have quit tonight. I am done with the nasty.
Exactly
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Offline NoMoreCopeBlack

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #5 on: December 08, 2014, 08:29:00 PM »
Own that shit, say, "I just threw away the last can and quit."

Second Grizclaws: reach down and grab some balls to hold during this process.

Drink water.
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Offline Grizzlyhasclaws

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #4 on: December 08, 2014, 08:29:00 PM »
Quote from: zacharynelson23
Well technically I have quit tonight. I am done with the nasty.
Oh good. I saw you say you moved your quit day until tomorrow.

Congrats!!! You are free.

Now read the Welcime center and go post roll in March 2015 in the quit group section. Do it right away.

Roll locks you into your quit for the rest of the day. Today is your day 1. Today is the first day of your quit. Today is the day you take back your freedom.
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Offline zacharynelson23

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Re: Dark Passenger
« Reply #3 on: December 08, 2014, 08:24:00 PM »
Well technically I have quit tonight. I am done with the nasty.
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