Thanks for the support, homies. I don't know what made me decide to just stop. I need to clarify an earlier post, since it has been mentioned. When I said "I love the stuff", I wasn't being accurate.
I think I liked it at first. Discovered it while playing High School Ball. New school, new kid, dip was a way to connect. I didn't really habitize it until college, and even by then I was hiding it. It's not a real popular social stigma it has in So Cal. It's even been hard to locate my brand at many times. I went in and out of cigs/dip, but the dip was always my favorite.
By the time I got to Dental School, there were a few of us dippers, and man we would hang together for sure. At the time I think I was still getting a buzz or an energy kick out of it, so it came in handy when studying, etc.
But the most interesting part of it, for me, was the hiding...the secret...the GAME. Shit, it was awesome.
Anyway, I became consciously aware of the length of time, and frequency I was using the stuff. But I never gave any serious thought to quitting. Bandits, pouches, then Snus made me feel more comfortable with it, because with the Snus, man I didn't even need to carry the tin around. I could throw a few in my shirt pocket and I was good to go. The stuff was pasturized, had lower nic content, and was basically dry, so there wasn't spit, and there really was no mess.
Now I'm outta control. All day, every day, found a local liquor store to order it in by the log. Haven't run out in years. I got the whole thing planned. And it's all a big secret. To everyone.
So, back to day 3. I tried to post roll. I'll go check if it worked. I felt so terrible last night I started thinking, maybe I should go back and just taper off a bit instead of going from full bore to nothing. Then I thought of the group and said, shit, I've been thru some of the hell already, I'm sticking it out.
And I am. One hour at a time.
javascript:emoticon("'bang head'")
DD