So today, I am at the store in the early morning after dropping kids off for school and I am purchasing seeds. 2 of the Frito-Lay packs for $1.00 (1 7/8ths oz per pack). I was buying 4 packs. No shit, as I was standing in the store calculating that I would spend probably $2 to $4 per day for the next few months in seeds, I was thinking "fuck is this quitting thing going to be expensive." Not until I got into my truck a few minutes later did I have head-hit-palm moment. I bet I had never until recently calculated the 2 to 3 cans per day per year. I damn sure hadn't thought about it while bitching about the state of the economy, how tight the purse strings were getting, etc.
So I enjoyed raising my right middle finger this morning to the Bitch and saying "fuck off you expensive whore". At the same time I felt like a dumb ass. Won't be the first damn time.
On a more serious note, the afternoon was hell at the office. Anxiety was tough to deal with. I had a hard time in the mid afternoon. Driving home was tough. Let me rephrase...driving home was awful. No shit my low fuel light comes on as I am pulling out of my office. Diesel isn't particularly plentiful around my town and the place I really needed to go was the place that I had bought dip from the past seven years about 5 days per week. So when I went in the guy already had two tins sitting out on the counter and asked if I wanted three. Telling him that I wanted none was a great, great feeling. Still it was a stressful few minutes. I'll be planning better for that. Day 1 is one thing. I'm sure that day 20, 25, 40, 60, etc. are worse. Good wake up call today.
Any other newbies out there - PM me and I'll PM you back my cell phone. We can do this shit. I am going to do this shit and I'll fucking drag your ass with me if need be.
