Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz

[GamerOnWheelz]

I will be posting Day 1 today  it hasn't been that bad but I know I'm only getting started. Most you are wanting a better explanation as to why I caved. So, here it is my Dad died in 2013 I had quit 2 years prior to this close to 1,000 days but from 2011 to 2013 I was still using Oregon Mint Pouches. So, I used it every day through the entire quit  never stopped. I feel that was part of the reason that caved so easily  using the flimsy excuse of my Dad dying, man what selfish asshole I was for doing that. Honestly I started using again because I was thinking about my pain  not considering others around me quite frankly I starting using again because I wanted to. My father committed suicide so I decided to do that also just a little slower by returning to the can. What kind of idiot uses that kind of logic? So I used for a while  thought I was slick by posting Day 1 in another quit group but I got caught. Everyone wanted an explanation as to why I fell off the wagon  I was like screw them I'm adult I'll do what I want. Yet again my addiction took over because of bad decision making  not considering my my wife, family  especially my KTC brothers  sisters. I see now why I should of stayed quit in the first place so today I want to apologize to everyone here at KTC for my actions. I know some of you would like to see me banned from KTC but I would like to ask that you reconsider because I've made mistakes  I know we all have on this site. Next time something major happens in my life I'm going to have to cope with things a lot differently in a more healthy way  that doesn't include smokeless tobacco but I will include my support system such as my wife, family  KTC family. That's all for now.

[Thumblewort]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just sitting here thinking "Who are you?" I have to stop soon or I will lose everything I care about especially my wife  family. That is all for now!

You only get one account my man, time to face the music.

My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer in November, guess what I didn't turn to. I am truly sorry for your loss, but it isn't an excuse. You have to own your quit each and every day.

I read all 3 pages of your intro, you had a "whos who" bunch of quitter helping you, yet you shied away from them. What will be different this time?

[AppleJack]

I'll repeat myself...

Ban

You taint what this place is all about. It's not a "try, and, try again" method. One and done. Own it.

[Wt57]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.

Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.

Damn it, I see that you're still lurking out there. If your serious you'll rip the bandaid off. I don't have a good feeling about this.

[Cope30]

Welcome to the brotherhood! It is going to be a long crazy ride but all of us in the BROTHERHOOD are behind you 100%.
Make that promise to not pick that can up ever again, you will want to, but don't give in to the Nic Bitch. She will whisper sweet nothings in your ear to get you to re-commit to her, I now she is sexy to look, she is a 10 right now, but like the saying goes, I went to bed at 2 with a 10 and woke up at 10 with a 2. That's what she will look like after some time a 2, then she will just disgust you to look at her. Hang in there we are all here for you! 'bang head'

[worktowin]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.

Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.

Oh, dude... you soooo don't get it. You've had ample time here to absorb protocol but... you haven't.

This is not the place for you.
Your track record has too many "tries" and your blatant use of a different name, despite a specific ban on that action, is enough reason for me to say... Adios. Buh-bye. GTFO.

Admins? I think a legit ban is in order here...

I am so confused.

Erussell, who today hits day 1,000, joined this site with a patch on. After a quick schooling, like the bad ass he is, he ripped that patch off and drank the kook aid. A cocaine addict would never switch to heroin to quit, anslcoholuc wouldn't switch from vodka to gin to quit...

I've been here 1,126 days and I just don't get it. Can someone explain to me how this logic of getting out a measuring stick and saying... Ok today I'm gonna cut my 10mg of neurotoxin down to 7.5mg... Accomplishes one goddamn thing other than keeping an addict addicted? Please someone teach me how this works! Inquiring minds want to know!!

[AppleJack]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.

Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.

Oh, dude... you soooo don't get it. You've had ample time here to absorb protocol but... you haven't.

This is not the place for you.
Your track record has too many "tries" and your blatant use of a different name, despite a specific ban on that action, is enough reason for me to say... Adios. Buh-bye. GTFO.

Admins? I think a legit ban is in order here...

[GamerOnWheelz]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.

Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.

[danojeno]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just sitting here thinking "Who are you?" I have to stop soon or I will lose everything I care about especially my wife  family. That is all for now!

So, you still aren't quit. Reading this update, I can tell you haven't learned very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.

[Wt57]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years.

ATTENTION ADMINS!!!

Thanks wastepanel, you did it while I was posting.

Boy that's a understatement. Here's a day 2 in September 2011, another day 1 in November 2013 and now you come back and change your name! That's pure bullshit!!! You posted enough times to know the rules. No new accounts. Lat time you were asked to answer the questions and refused to do so. As for me I think that you tore up your return to the site card up. I've seen others banned for less! Let's get some administrative ruling on your case. At very least combine your accounts and answer the questions to the satisfaction of true quitters!

November Sky Divers
"The first step is a big one but that's when the fun begins"
Pre HOF November 2013

Today is: Thursday, November 14, 2013



NOVEMBER SKY DIVERS

GamerOnWheelz - Day 1

KICKASS SUPPORTERS

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

December 2011 Roll Call
===============================

I'm trying to unfuck this so that everyone who posted is here...and so we have a good roll to pull from...

Kick Ass December Quitters:


GamerOnWheelz - Day 2
Kick Ass December Support:

-

[wastepanel]

bump

[RollinOverTheCan]

Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just sitting here thinking "Who are you?" I have to stop soon or I will lose everything I care about especially my wife  family. That is all for now!

[Menace]

GOW is now 4 days without posting roll on his latest attempt anyway.......not looking good......

[Mthomas3824]

???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days

GamerOnWheelz - 774

What goes between these 2 posts?????

GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 

Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'

GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering

Still unanswered.

You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.

Still waiting sunshine.

It's time for everyone to discover something as well. If agreeable I think there should be a 4th question going forward....

4. Did you have alcohol in your system at the time of your cave?

The fact is, most caves start with alcohol and then promises are forgotten or easily excused with a "Fuck it" impulse choice.

I am guessing that over 90% of caving past 45 days involves alcohol consumption.

I would like the 4th question to be part of the drill to see if there is a link to caving.

I agree, except it needs to be question 1! That way we could all cut through the bullshit and realize that the alcohol buzz and the nic buzz are pretty much the same thing. I am disheartened a little here. I am resolved to quit skoal and haven't had any for 76 days and then there is a guy who committed for so long then caved all of a sudden after a quit day number that I only dream about. I get the QODAAT philosophy now. DAMN!!! Nicotine sucks!!!!

Who cares if there was alcohol involved? Not to say it isnt a factor in many caves, but honestly its not the reason for a cave and is not acceptable as an excuse.

I have had plenty of alcohol in my system since I decided "no more nic." Before and after HOF. I have been around smokers, chewers, and cigars. I have been around those with groups of people that have no link to this site, and no knowledge that I quit 1,044 days ago (or whatever the day count is). I could have pulled a PaddyMac or a GOW or any other "shit guys, I got drunk and a cigarette/chew/snuss/cigar just magically appeared in my mouth; guess I am back at day 1 but this time is different cause I mean it" bullshit caver nonsense.

But I have not, and I will not. I give my word every damn day. More importantly, I made a choice 1,044 days ago that I am damn tired of being a slave. Every day when I give my word, I am free from those bonds. Never again, for any reason, will I use nicotine. I have been through the birth of my son, the ICU for my son (2x), my father's hospitalization and death, friends deaths, football games, baseball games, tailgates, drunken HS reunions, vacations, long drives, shitty weather, sleep deprivation, bowling, yardwork, and pretty much everything else. I have been black out drunk and stone sober. Occasionally a craving hits, and sometimes they linger like a fart in the shower, but ultimately my word means something to me.

No, dont even give the semblance of a alcohol being an even close to acceptable reason for caving. Its a bullshit excuse for those with weak resolve and shows a lack of testicular fortitude. Either quit or don't, life will keep on throwing the good and bad at you. Make the decisions you need to make to defend your quit, have a plan, and give your word as a bond.

Alcohol cannot make you cave. And I dont really give a shit if you were drunk when you did cave. Its irrelevant.

J2B I agree. Alcohol isn't a reason, justification or excuse to cave. For the quit, drinking is not relevant to their quit. You haven't caved, I haven't caved and plenty of people drunk or sober will not cave.

I only have a theory that a planned cave (in most instances) involves alcohol to numb and justify an impulse to chew. Cavers can answer what impact alcohol had in their choice to cave.

A quitters alcohol consumption is not relevant but if there is a pattern with 90% of cavers, I suggest it is relevant to the fallen. The site recommends to not drink for the first 50 days. I am thinking that if a caver post day 1, they should consider following the plan but making the 50 days sober a requirement in their quit and not just a recommendation.

Wearing a seatbelt is a good recommendation. It doesn't really prevent accidents but it assists in saving lives. Maybe alcohol doesn't cause or excuse a cave but sobriety for the first 50 days + might assist in saving a person's quit?

All my opinion and theory.

[J2b]

???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days

GamerOnWheelz - 774

What goes between these 2 posts?????

GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 

Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'

GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering

Still unanswered.

You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.

Still waiting sunshine.

It's time for everyone to discover something as well. If agreeable I think there should be a 4th question going forward....

4. Did you have alcohol in your system at the time of your cave?

The fact is, most caves start with alcohol and then promises are forgotten or easily excused with a "Fuck it" impulse choice.

I am guessing that over 90% of caving past 45 days involves alcohol consumption.

I would like the 4th question to be part of the drill to see if there is a link to caving.

I agree, except it needs to be question 1! That way we could all cut through the bullshit and realize that the alcohol buzz and the nic buzz are pretty much the same thing. I am disheartened a little here. I am resolved to quit skoal and haven't had any for 76 days and then there is a guy who committed for so long then caved all of a sudden after a quit day number that I only dream about. I get the QODAAT philosophy now. DAMN!!! Nicotine sucks!!!!

Who cares if there was alcohol involved? Not to say it isnt a factor in many caves, but honestly its not the reason for a cave and is not acceptable as an excuse.

I have had plenty of alcohol in my system since I decided "no more nic." Before and after HOF. I have been around smokers, chewers, and cigars. I have been around those with groups of people that have no link to this site, and no knowledge that I quit 1,044 days ago (or whatever the day count is). I could have pulled a PaddyMac or a GOW or any other "shit guys, I got drunk and a cigarette/chew/snuss/cigar just magically appeared in my mouth; guess I am back at day 1 but this time is different cause I mean it" bullshit caver nonsense.

But I have not, and I will not. I give my word every damn day. More importantly, I made a choice 1,044 days ago that I am damn tired of being a slave. Every day when I give my word, I am free from those bonds. Never again, for any reason, will I use nicotine. I have been through the birth of my son, the ICU for my son (2x), my father's hospitalization and death, friends deaths, football games, baseball games, tailgates, drunken HS reunions, vacations, long drives, shitty weather, sleep deprivation, bowling, yardwork, and pretty much everything else. I have been black out drunk and stone sober. Occasionally a craving hits, and sometimes they linger like a fart in the shower, but ultimately my word means something to me.

No, dont even give the semblance of a alcohol being an even close to acceptable reason for caving. Its a bullshit excuse for those with weak resolve and shows a lack of testicular fortitude. Either quit or don't, life will keep on throwing the good and bad at you. Make the decisions you need to make to defend your quit, have a plan, and give your word as a bond.

Alcohol cannot make you cave. And I dont really give a shit if you were drunk when you did cave. Its irrelevant.