DAY 700
Life is freaking insane...and cruel. Between March and June of this year I lost unexpectedly and buried both my dad and best friend. To be honest, I keep thinking that I'm going to run out of tears but they still seem to find a way to appear.
While the loss has been great and often unbearable, I have been able to hold on to my quit and it is just as strong as ever.
I often boast that the last time I had a real "crave" was around Day 110. However, Saturday before last I was dealing with and consoling my mom because it would had been her and my dad's 53rd Wedding Anniversary...Sunday was Father's Day...Sunday night I flew to Albany for a few days for funeral services for my friend. Around this time I actually had one of those fleeting thoughts - literally a thought like, "I'll be having a chew in the car when I get away from the wife and kids." WOW, when I had that I was shocked. To be honest, I know in my heart and soul I would have never acted on it but just the fact that it crossed my mind blew me away. I guess I was at my fill of just shit. Undoubtedly, the support here and my daily promises have taken it off the table.
Proud to be at 700 today and 100% posting.
Thanks folks.
Paul