Hello From Jacksonville

[worktowin]

Okay - I'm 9 days into my quit. I found this website a year ago but didn't think I needed it to quit. 4 days later I bought another can. I decided last Monday night (Labor Day) as I put the last pinch from my can of Grizzly into my lip that I would quit. I was sitting on the deck around my pool having a cocktail with my wife and said, "Don't give me shit for this one. It's my last." She didn't and said, "Good luck. You can do it if you want to." Well - 9 days later and I'm still Nic free. I found some Smokey Mountain cans that I got a year ago. Still moist and fresh. So I've worked through those when working around the house and having a beer with friends. I know that not drinking is a big help but that's prob not going to happen. Anyway, it's been a bitch but getting better every day. I'll go into more once I figure this site out. Great site by the way. I'm in 100% and will be every day from now on. I want to help others beat the same addiction that I'm going through every day, one day at a time.

What I need is to figure out how to join a group. I want to sign into Roll Call each day, bitch when I need to bitch and support when I need to support. Someone please help me. I'm in the foggy stage of my quit and just can't figure it out. LOL

Thanks and stay committed and strong. Tomorrow will be better if today's a bitch. Just get through today.

Mike

1,000 days ago a great man named Mike started a journey at KTC. Here is his first foggy post on the site. Along the way he has helped countless of us that were in a similar state make it past those first few days - and beyond.

Thank you for all that you do, and congratulations on a monumental achievement. It is an honor to quit with you.

[Evil_Won]

bout time for a 1/2 comma update??

'clap'

'BanDog'

[cbird65]

bout time for a 1/2 comma update??

'clap'

[916quit]

Day 150

It's been a couple months since I've posted in my intro and the last two were sad and more of a PSA to the newbies when I wrote about the anniversary of my father passing and hitting the 70 day fog/doldrums.

Today is day 150 and I feel awesome. Still haven't written my HOF speech yet but I'm thinking I will today. I'm not cured, I can't handle nicotine in any form what so ever for the rest of my life. I am an addict. It's just that simple. I'm not ashamed to say that. I'm proud to be able to say it with a clear consience and knowledge that I must stay focused on my quit every day. I know there are going to be tough times ahead and I'll sink into the fog and even have a craving every so often. I may even have a panic attack when I least expect it. I also know that there will be tough times in my life whether it be family related or work related that will test my resolve as an addict to stay clean, keep my word and not let so many people down that I've let into my life as fellow addicts. I know these tough times will pass and I will use all that I've learned from so many on this site. Dipping is never an option!

This is what keeps me nicotine free every single day. I post roll each morning with the Chew Weckin' Crew of Dec. 2012. I usually post roll in all the pre-HOF groups and a few others with friends I have made along the way. That is my word and I will keep it. "I quit with you today." That is so simple....too simple when I try to explain it to my addict friends that haven't joined yet.

Now, what solidifies my resolve and makes me stronger than I ever thougth I could be are those relationships that I've developed over the past 150-days. I will mention all by name and thank them in my HOF speech that I plan to write today and into tomorrow. It is the hilarious texts we share, pics we share, and problems we share. When we are at our most vulnerable, we share who we are, what we are and how we are feeling with people we may have never met, but trust so much that we are willing to completely open up our souls and let them in to protect and help us. I am here for all of you and I know that I need you to continue my quit one day at a time. That, my friends, is the power of Kill The Can.

Thanks for reading. I quit with all of you today. You make my life better.

Diplessinjax

You are one solid dude!
I Quit with you every damn day. Starting again tomorrow!

[DiplessinJax]

Day 150

It's been a couple months since I've posted in my intro and the last two were sad and more of a PSA to the newbies when I wrote about the anniversary of my father passing and hitting the 70 day fog/doldrums.

Today is day 150 and I feel awesome. Still haven't written my HOF speech yet but I'm thinking I will today. I'm not cured, I can't handle nicotine in any form what so ever for the rest of my life. I am an addict. It's just that simple. I'm not ashamed to say that. I'm proud to be able to say it with a clear consience and knowledge that I must stay focused on my quit every day. I know there are going to be tough times ahead and I'll sink into the fog and even have a craving every so often. I may even have a panic attack when I least expect it. I also know that there will be tough times in my life whether it be family related or work related that will test my resolve as an addict to stay clean, keep my word and not let so many people down that I've let into my life as fellow addicts. I know these tough times will pass and I will use all that I've learned from so many on this site. Dipping is never an option!

This is what keeps me nicotine free every single day. I post roll each morning with the Chew Weckin' Crew of Dec. 2012. I usually post roll in all the pre-HOF groups and a few others with friends I have made along the way. That is my word and I will keep it. "I quit with you today." That is so simple....too simple when I try to explain it to my addict friends that haven't joined yet.

Now, what solidifies my resolve and makes me stronger than I ever thougth I could be are those relationships that I've developed over the past 150-days. I will mention all by name and thank them in my HOF speech that I plan to write today and into tomorrow. It is the hilarious texts we share, pics we share, and problems we share. When we are at our most vulnerable, we share who we are, what we are and how we are feeling with people we may have never met, but trust so much that we are willing to completely open up our souls and let them in to protect and help us. I am here for all of you and I know that I need you to continue my quit one day at a time. That, my friends, is the power of Kill The Can.

Thanks for reading. I quit with all of you today. You make my life better.

Diplessinjax

[jhaenel23]

I'm starting a new topic because this rant doesn't need to be in my intro. 

What happens at 100 days that makes so many quitters decide to stop posting?  100 days isn't a magical date that your body says, "Yep. I'll never ask you for nicotine again. Go about your life crave free. Get hammered with all your old dipping buddies and I'll never lean in and ask for just one because your hard working ass deserves it." 

I post in a few of the Dec groups as well as 7 or 8 others.  I notice when a group turns a year, there's not not as many posts.  Two years there is half of what there was at a year.  Anything beyond that is a small card game with 4 to 6 quitters pledging to each other.  How fucking hard is it to go to the website that kept you clean for over 3 months and promise to your TEAM, if you will, that you won't use today and I'm hear to help if your day turns bad and the bitch starts sweet talking you?  I use team because for the first time since college, I truly feel like I'm part of something that is so much bigger than me. The bond and camaraderie that has developed between myself and so many other quitters, not only from my group but others that have been quit a month longer to 4 years longer than me is incredible.  I need this to fight my demons every day.  You hold me accountable for my quit as I do you. 

My problem is, what can we do?  I don't have everyone's number so I can't text them all.  I can PM, as I've been doing but, if they're not posting, they're not reading their PM's. 

I don't know.  I'm just really frustrated about this.  You never think it's going to happen to your group.  Brothers forever, right?  I guess I should take solice in the fact that I've met so many great quitters that I call friends and text or chat with on an almost daily basis.  "Use what you need and leave the rest behind."  I get that saying now.  I suppose I'm looking for a little more, "pay it forward." 

Thanks for reading and letting me get that out. 

Diplessinjax - 135 - See you tomorrow.

well said ....

x2.

Dipless, there are some groups that run strong beyond 100 days. To me, its ALL about the camaraderie you build during the first 100 days (both on and off the board). The more you can get involved, and get others involved (paying it forward is great, but I am talking about general chatter as well), the better you will be able to keep em coming back. Basically, the more folks get it the more they stick around.

Some just dont get it. They want to be cured, and they have "broken the habit" of chewing. They dont truly believe or understand exactly what it means to be an addict, and while they may say the words they are just that - words.

They forgot day 1. They forgot the first week. They forgot the countless stories from cavers that start with "I quit posting roll" and they say things like "coming to the site was the only thing that reminded me of dipping."

It is very aggravating to see brothers (and sisters) begin to drift and fade. You cant save em all, but when I notice someone close to my quit (May 11 brothers, anyone who was active in our group, groups I post with, etc) drifting, I begin the text/pm parade.

Ultimately, we cant quit for them so its important to always remember to protect your own quit first and foremost. Dont let the fact those you thought would be here with you daily are now drifting and "too busy" to post deviate you from your approach. Me, I posted today and I am quit today. Same as the past 723 days. Longest I have been quit since I started, despite more attempts than I can count.

why mess with success?

I hear the frustration in Dip's note. I get it. Josh hits it on the head though. Protect your own quit. I think of it more as when you get together with your college buddies or HS buddies. There is still the friendship there but we have other priorities in life other than watching 4 sportscenters and skipping class. Its not that we are any less friends and that we werent important to each other at that time. It just people moving on. The KTC is what you make of it. Some choose to put more time in than others. Some choose to Pay it forward longer than others. But we are all still quit in the end!!

[J2b]

I'm starting a new topic because this rant doesn't need to be in my intro. 

What happens at 100 days that makes so many quitters decide to stop posting?  100 days isn't a magical date that your body says, "Yep. I'll never ask you for nicotine again. Go about your life crave free. Get hammered with all your old dipping buddies and I'll never lean in and ask for just one because your hard working ass deserves it." 

I post in a few of the Dec groups as well as 7 or 8 others.  I notice when a group turns a year, there's not not as many posts.  Two years there is half of what there was at a year.  Anything beyond that is a small card game with 4 to 6 quitters pledging to each other.  How fucking hard is it to go to the website that kept you clean for over 3 months and promise to your TEAM, if you will, that you won't use today and I'm hear to help if your day turns bad and the bitch starts sweet talking you?  I use team because for the first time since college, I truly feel like I'm part of something that is so much bigger than me. The bond and camaraderie that has developed between myself and so many other quitters, not only from my group but others that have been quit a month longer to 4 years longer than me is incredible.  I need this to fight my demons every day.  You hold me accountable for my quit as I do you. 

My problem is, what can we do?  I don't have everyone's number so I can't text them all.  I can PM, as I've been doing but, if they're not posting, they're not reading their PM's. 

I don't know.  I'm just really frustrated about this.  You never think it's going to happen to your group.  Brothers forever, right?  I guess I should take solice in the fact that I've met so many great quitters that I call friends and text or chat with on an almost daily basis.  "Use what you need and leave the rest behind."  I get that saying now.  I suppose I'm looking for a little more, "pay it forward." 

Thanks for reading and letting me get that out. 

Diplessinjax - 135 - See you tomorrow.

well said ....

x2.

Dipless, there are some groups that run strong beyond 100 days. To me, its ALL about the camaraderie you build during the first 100 days (both on and off the board). The more you can get involved, and get others involved (paying it forward is great, but I am talking about general chatter as well), the better you will be able to keep em coming back. Basically, the more folks get it the more they stick around.

Some just dont get it. They want to be cured, and they have "broken the habit" of chewing. They dont truly believe or understand exactly what it means to be an addict, and while they may say the words they are just that - words.

They forgot day 1. They forgot the first week. They forgot the countless stories from cavers that start with "I quit posting roll" and they say things like "coming to the site was the only thing that reminded me of dipping."

It is very aggravating to see brothers (and sisters) begin to drift and fade. You cant save em all, but when I notice someone close to my quit (May 11 brothers, anyone who was active in our group, groups I post with, etc) drifting, I begin the text/pm parade.

Ultimately, we cant quit for them so its important to always remember to protect your own quit first and foremost. Dont let the fact those you thought would be here with you daily are now drifting and "too busy" to post deviate you from your approach. Me, I posted today and I am quit today. Same as the past 723 days. Longest I have been quit since I started, despite more attempts than I can count.

why mess with success?

[Sportsfan231]

I'm starting a new topic because this rant doesn't need to be in my intro.

What happens at 100 days that makes so many quitters decide to stop posting? 100 days isn't a magical date that your body says, "Yep. I'll never ask you for nicotine again. Go about your life crave free. Get hammered with all your old dipping buddies and I'll never lean in and ask for just one because your hard working ass deserves it."

I post in a few of the Dec groups as well as 7 or 8 others. I notice when a group turns a year, there's not not as many posts. Two years there is half of what there was at a year. Anything beyond that is a small card game with 4 to 6 quitters pledging to each other. How fucking hard is it to go to the website that kept you clean for over 3 months and promise to your TEAM, if you will, that you won't use today and I'm hear to help if your day turns bad and the bitch starts sweet talking you? I use team because for the first time since college, I truly feel like I'm part of something that is so much bigger than me. The bond and camaraderie that has developed between myself and so many other quitters, not only from my group but others that have been quit a month longer to 4 years longer than me is incredible. I need this to fight my demons every day. You hold me accountable for my quit as I do you.

My problem is, what can we do? I don't have everyone's number so I can't text them all. I can PM, as I've been doing but, if they're not posting, they're not reading their PM's.

I don't know. I'm just really frustrated about this. You never think it's going to happen to your group. Brothers forever, right? I guess I should take solice in the fact that I've met so many great quitters that I call friends and text or chat with on an almost daily basis. "Use what you need and leave the rest behind." I get that saying now. I suppose I'm looking for a little more, "pay it forward."

Thanks for reading and letting me get that out.

Diplessinjax - 135 - See you tomorrow.

well said ....

[DiplessinJax]

I'm starting a new topic because this rant doesn't need to be in my intro.

What happens at 100 days that makes so many quitters decide to stop posting? 100 days isn't a magical date that your body says, "Yep. I'll never ask you for nicotine again. Go about your life crave free. Get hammered with all your old dipping buddies and I'll never lean in and ask for just one because your hard working ass deserves it."

I post in a few of the Dec groups as well as 7 or 8 others. I notice when a group turns a year, there's not not as many posts. Two years there is half of what there was at a year. Anything beyond that is a small card game with 4 to 6 quitters pledging to each other. How fucking hard is it to go to the website that kept you clean for over 3 months and promise to your TEAM, if you will, that you won't use today and I'm hear to help if your day turns bad and the bitch starts sweet talking you? I use team because for the first time since college, I truly feel like I'm part of something that is so much bigger than me. The bond and camaraderie that has developed between myself and so many other quitters, not only from my group but others that have been quit a month longer to 4 years longer than me is incredible. I need this to fight my demons every day. You hold me accountable for my quit as I do you.

My problem is, what can we do? I don't have everyone's number so I can't text them all. I can PM, as I've been doing but, if they're not posting, they're not reading their PM's.

I don't know. I'm just really frustrated about this. You never think it's going to happen to your group. Brothers forever, right? I guess I should take solice in the fact that I've met so many great quitters that I call friends and text or chat with on an almost daily basis. "Use what you need and leave the rest behind." I get that saying now. I suppose I'm looking for a little more, "pay it forward."

Thanks for reading and letting me get that out.

Diplessinjax - 135 - See you tomorrow.

[lcwb96]

Great story, Mike. Glad you shared. Aren't Dads the best? All the things they have taught us. I am fortunate to still have my Dad around, but wish we could see each other more often.

[DiplessinJax]

Here is to you and your dad sir.

Peter Gabriel - Father Son
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PMEuJmz3CU

razd - Thank you very much. I'll keep that link saved and send to my brother.

Thank you all for all of your supprt and very kind words. They mean so much to me. It's really overwhelming. God bless you all.

Mike

[RAZD611]

Here is to you and your dad sir.

Peter Gabriel - Father Son
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PMEuJmz3CU

[tarpon17]

Here I sit at day 86 of my quit. My quit is good and my quit is strong. I gave thanks last week for my new family of quitters that have blessed my life and give me the strength to be quit every day. I give thanks to my immediate family that supports me every day.

Today is a sad day for me and I didn't know where to express how I was feeling so I figured I would come here. Today is the one year anniversary of my father's passing. I give thanks for every day I had with him.....even the bad days before he left us. He was my hero. A man that never missed a day of work. A man that cared for my mother for several years before she passed. A man that taught me how to compete and be better than I thought I could be. With few words he could say what takes me forever to get across. As I've referred to him so many times. He was John Wayne in my life. There was nothing he couldn't do. I watched him hit balls out of park when coaching my brothers teams when he was in his late 30's. He did it with my teams when he was in his mid 40's. No shit.....looked at one pitch, second pitch dead center, half way up the light pole. John Freaking Wayne I'm telling you.

I miss him rolling into the house after church with his travel mug of coffee, sitting on the couch and breaking down my son's baseball game from the previous day....Or about his Doctor's appointments the previous week in great detail. Then, all of a sudden, he'd stand up and say, "Well. I gotta go." And off into the sunset he'd walk.....so to speak. He was funny with a dry sense of humor. I didn't see that side too much until my mom passed. I am so glad I did. He love his grandkids, my wife who took care of him several times while I was out of town. Most of all, he loved my son, Drew. He never missed a ball game and was so proud of him. I miss debating hitting philosopy with him like it was religion. Well, it's pretty close to that in our house. I miss him sitting on my back deck watching a Steelers game, drinking a couple of Rolling Rocks, falling asleep and as the Steelers score, him popping his head up and saying, "Yeah.....Big Ben!!!!" Then looking around giggling a little with his eyes all red.

I think I'm going to try to let the sad go for a while and just give thanks for the 45 wonderful years I got to spend with him. I'll drink a couple Rocks and think about him hitting home runs, calling pitches from the stands when I was in High School, trying to teach me to change the oil in my car while I stood in the drive way dribbling a baskeball and shooting hoops, letting me slide the first time I came home drunk and my mother was asleep in her chair. The next day making me do 4 or 5 hours of yard work in the FL heat. Well played, dad.

Most of all I will think about how proud he would be of me for my quit. He quit smoking, cold turkey, when he was around 44. Never looked back and never had another cig. He was an original Rock Star, quit Gladiator. I'll quit with and for him today.

If you're reading this. Thank you for listening. I'm starting to feel better.

DiplessinJax

Awesome story man. I too have a rock star dad. Actually my step dad. He taught me everything, taught me to fish, taught me to think about things around me. Led me to be in the field I am today. As awesome as John Wayne, he quit smoking cold turkey also. Never looked back. Wish I coulda learned from him. As he was quitting I was just getting started. 23 yrs later we can now be quit together. Thanks for sharing, I'll quit with Jax anyday, including today.

[Gunner75]

Thanks for writing that Man, it was excellent.

I am fortunate to still have both of my folks here today, and it has been one of my biggest fears in life to lose them.

My mothers Dad, my grandfather is a World War 2 vet, was on a ship in the Harbor when it was bombed, and part of Casablanca etc. Anyway, we are watching him fade away as I type this. Its sad to watch, and hard to deal with. The circle of life can be very rough.

Sorry I went off on your post, but wanted to thank you for writing that, and for the support you have given me in the past.

I am sorry for the loss of your father, and I am sure he would be damn proud of you for tackling your addiction.


I am quit with you today bro!

[Kdip]

Here I sit at day 86 of my quit. My quit is good and my quit is strong. I gave thanks last week for my new family of quitters that have blessed my life and give me the strength to be quit every day. I give thanks to my immediate family that supports me every day.

Today is a sad day for me and I didn't know where to express how I was feeling so I figured I would come here. Today is the one year anniversary of my father's passing. I give thanks for every day I had with him.....even the bad days before he left us. He was my hero. A man that never missed a day of work. A man that cared for my mother for several years before she passed. A man that taught me how to compete and be better than I thought I could be. With few words he could say what takes me forever to get across. As I've referred to him so many times. He was John Wayne in my life. There was nothing he couldn't do. I watched him hit balls out of park when coaching my brothers teams when he was in his late 30's. He did it with my teams when he was in his mid 40's. No shit.....looked at one pitch, second pitch dead center, half way up the light pole. John Freaking Wayne I'm telling you.

I miss him rolling into the house after church with his travel mug of coffee, sitting on the couch and breaking down my son's baseball game from the previous day....Or about his Doctor's appointments the previous week in great detail. Then, all of a sudden, he'd stand up and say, "Well. I gotta go." And off into the sunset he'd walk.....so to speak. He was funny with a dry sense of humor. I didn't see that side too much until my mom passed. I am so glad I did. He love his grandkids, my wife who took care of him several times while I was out of town. Most of all, he loved my son, Drew. He never missed a ball game and was so proud of him. I miss debating hitting philosopy with him like it was religion. Well, it's pretty close to that in our house. I miss him sitting on my back deck watching a Steelers game, drinking a couple of Rolling Rocks, falling asleep and as the Steelers score, him popping his head up and saying, "Yeah.....Big Ben!!!!" Then looking around giggling a little with his eyes all red.

I think I'm going to try to let the sad go for a while and just give thanks for the 45 wonderful years I got to spend with him. I'll drink a couple Rocks and think about him hitting home runs, calling pitches from the stands when I was in High School, trying to teach me to change the oil in my car while I stood in the drive way dribbling a baskeball and shooting hoops, letting me slide the first time I came home drunk and my mother was asleep in her chair. The next day making me do 4 or 5 hours of yard work in the FL heat. Well played, dad.

Most of all I will think about how proud he would be of me for my quit. He quit smoking, cold turkey, when he was around 44. Never looked back and never had another cig. He was an original Rock Star, quit Gladiator. I'll quit with and for him today.

If you're reading this. Thank you for listening. I'm starting to feel better.

DiplessinJax

THX for sharing. Sorry your father's life was cut short like that. My father's life was cut short due to cancer but he did live to be 61. Hopefully our lives won't be cut short like that since we can chosen to take the healthy road and quit!!!