Day One

[neveragain10]

Just a quick update.

Day 37 of the quit(e) (I wish I could change that. It must have been the fog). The craves are certainly coming on strong, and at unexpected moments. I try to avoid all the triggers, and yet I'll find a huge crave doing something as mundane as... walking up the stairs, or filling the ice cube tray, or sweeping the rug. It does get annoying, but it is also encouraging. The bitch is getting desperate.

I'm gonna take some time to re-read the the site again this weekend, check in with quit groups past and present, listen to some sage advice from the vets, and maybe even a chat or two. One of the best things I have learned from this site is that we are never free from our addiction. I'm a third of the way to the HOF, and I'm going to treat this weekend like its the first weekend of my quit... guard it with my life.

My friend, you appear to have all the tools in place to swing this quit by it's tail. Nice positive outlook. It can't be said enough how much better it will get. If you can actually remember three weeks ago, I'm sure you will agree that it is already getting better every day.

Day by day, the suck melts away slowly. Some days are great, some not so much. When all you can do is look forward to the good times, an attitude like yours is gonna go a long way.

Stay quit and enjoy.

neveragain10

[aabye1]

Just a quick update.

Day 37 of the quit(e) (I wish I could change that. It must have been the fog). The craves are certainly coming on strong, and at unexpected moments. I try to avoid all the triggers, and yet I'll find a huge crave doing something as mundane as... walking up the stairs, or filling the ice cube tray, or sweeping the rug. It does get annoying, but it is also encouraging. The bitch is getting desperate.

I'm gonna take some time to re-read the the site again this weekend, check in with quit groups past and present, listen to some sage advice from the vets, and maybe even a chat or two. One of the best things I have learned from this site is that we are never free from our addiction. I'm a third of the way to the HOF, and I'm going to treat this weekend like its the first weekend of my quit... guard it with my life.

[Greg5280]

Ready to be quit tomorrow right there with you. We GOT THIS shit!!!

Tomorrow ? Why wait until tomorrow ? Is it going to be easier tomorrow?

There is no perfect time to quit other than right now. Dump your can, and start your quit.

Tomorrow is going to suck too !! Just sayin...

[DoneDippingDenny]

Ready to be quit tomorrow right there with you. We GOT THIS shit!!!

[aabye1]

Been a little light on the post here (but have made roll everyday, and will continue to do so). The quit is strong. Right now I'm in a hotel room, away from friends, family, and everything else because my job requires this thing every six weeks or so. Huge trigger time for me, and I'm not gonna lie, the craves have been seductive...

But not enough. The quit is kicking strong. I am certainly not as twitchy as I was in my first couple of weeks, and the fog seems to be lifting a bit... these are good things.

But, and I say this to myself and to all of October (and everyone else)... I am feeling this is a dangerous time. Lassitude and arrogance. I know the bitch is gonna show up stronger than ever soon. I'm doing some furious re-reading of everything right now. Looking at cave stories and hardcore cock grabbing quit stories. I do not have this beat. But I am at least throwing punches.

Stay strong October. We have a big group. Let's not get lazy.

I can't wait to be quit tomorrow.

[KTG]

You will look at many things differently once you are not sucking on the NIC bitches tit 17 hours a day.

That's a great quote right there, that was me to a T.

[Greg5280]

Cancrusher,

Sorry it took so long to get back to you.  I was out of town, and my internet access was just enough to post roll.

Your post raised a good question, and one that I had intended to ask the members of KTC for their advice.  What do you say to your spouse when you quit, when she didn't know you had the problem in the first place?

Well, I went ahead and told her this last weekend.  We were on a family vacation, having a ton of fun and relaxing, entirely free from the normal stress of quotidian life.  I decided that then would have been as good a time as any.

So I told her the truth... that I had had a nasty habit for the three years that we were married, that I hid it from her because I was embarrassed/ashamed, and that I had just recently quit.

She was upset, to be sure, but not fly-off-the-handle-get-ready-to-have-your-eyeballs-scratched-out upset.  Just disappointment.  But, she was also glad that I was quit.  She asked if that explained my mood this past week, being irritable, short-tempered, etc.  I said that it probably had something to do with it.

Anyways, I am glad I told her.  Even if her reaction had been worse, I would still be glad.  I was tired of lying to her about my habit, but it would have still been lying if I hadn't told her that I had taken up a new habit - Quitting.

huge step brother. I too was a secret dipper (or so you think anyway). She knew, it was just the elephant in the room that no one talked about. Now that you have established communication on this subject. You will need to bring it up again. Don't expect her to ask if your still quit. She might be afraid that you'll say no, or just lie about it. When you hit a week, 20 days, 30 days.... tell her. I'm still staying strong...

Post every day and keep your promise

Here's something I found really interesting about my own quit. My wife has always known that I chew. If I had to sneak it by her I would have spent zero time with her, because I always had a chew in. But the interesting thing is that even though she knew, and I always had a dip in, I was still lying and sneaking around. I realize I used to stay up later just to have that extra chew, I would act like I was being nice and getting her a treat from the store but really I just wanted to buy a tin. Shit like that. Even though I didn't have to hide my addiction, the addiction was making me hide from her. I feel horrible about it now and I'm just really glad to have found this site and be quit. I have a baby girl on the way and fuck if I'm gonna let that dirty nic bitch take a second of my life away from her.

This is good shit right here. All part of healing.

You will look at many things differently once you are not sucking on the NIC bitches tit 17 hours a day.

I have found many things about my past I do not like, I am working to correct those. I can say without a doubt I like the dip free me much better than the guy I used to be.

Stay quit.. it is worth it !!

[KTG]

Cancrusher,

Sorry it took so long to get back to you.  I was out of town, and my internet access was just enough to post roll.

Your post raised a good question, and one that I had intended to ask the members of KTC for their advice.  What do you say to your spouse when you quit, when she didn't know you had the problem in the first place?

Well, I went ahead and told her this last weekend.  We were on a family vacation, having a ton of fun and relaxing, entirely free from the normal stress of quotidian life.  I decided that then would have been as good a time as any.

So I told her the truth... that I had had a nasty habit for the three years that we were married, that I hid it from her because I was embarrassed/ashamed, and that I had just recently quit.

She was upset, to be sure, but not fly-off-the-handle-get-ready-to-have-your-eyeballs-scratched-out upset.  Just disappointment.  But, she was also glad that I was quit.  She asked if that explained my mood this past week, being irritable, short-tempered, etc.  I said that it probably had something to do with it.

Anyways, I am glad I told her.  Even if her reaction had been worse, I would still be glad.  I was tired of lying to her about my habit, but it would have still been lying if I hadn't told her that I had taken up a new habit - Quitting.

huge step brother. I too was a secret dipper (or so you think anyway). She knew, it was just the elephant in the room that no one talked about. Now that you have established communication on this subject. You will need to bring it up again. Don't expect her to ask if your still quit. She might be afraid that you'll say no, or just lie about it. When you hit a week, 20 days, 30 days.... tell her. I'm still staying strong...

Post every day and keep your promise

Here's something I found really interesting about my own quit. My wife has always known that I chew. If I had to sneak it by her I would have spent zero time with her, because I always had a chew in. But the interesting thing is that even though she knew, and I always had a dip in, I was still lying and sneaking around. I realize I used to stay up later just to have that extra chew, I would act like I was being nice and getting her a treat from the store but really I just wanted to buy a tin. Shit like that. Even though I didn't have to hide my addiction, the addiction was making me hide from her. I feel horrible about it now and I'm just really glad to have found this site and be quit. I have a baby girl on the way and fuck if I'm gonna let that dirty nic bitch take a second of my life away from her.

[RWM]

Cancrusher,

Sorry it took so long to get back to you.  I was out of town, and my internet access was just enough to post roll.

Your post raised a good question, and one that I had intended to ask the members of KTC for their advice.  What do you say to your spouse when you quit, when she didn't know you had the problem in the first place?

Well, I went ahead and told her this last weekend.  We were on a family vacation, having a ton of fun and relaxing, entirely free from the normal stress of quotidian life.  I decided that then would have been as good a time as any.

So I told her the truth... that I had had a nasty habit for the three years that we were married, that I hid it from her because I was embarrassed/ashamed, and that I had just recently quit.

She was upset, to be sure, but not fly-off-the-handle-get-ready-to-have-your-eyeballs-scratched-out upset.  Just disappointment.  But, she was also glad that I was quit.  She asked if that explained my mood this past week, being irritable, short-tempered, etc.  I said that it probably had something to do with it.

Anyways, I am glad I told her.  Even if her reaction had been worse, I would still be glad.  I was tired of lying to her about my habit, but it would have still been lying if I hadn't told her that I had taken up a new habit - Quitting.

huge step brother. I too was a secret dipper (or so you think anyway). She knew, it was just the elephant in the room that no one talked about. Now that you have established communication on this subject. You will need to bring it up again. Don't expect her to ask if your still quit. She might be afraid that you'll say no, or just lie about it. When you hit a week, 20 days, 30 days.... tell her. I'm still staying strong...

Post every day and keep your promise

[aabye1]

Cancrusher,

Sorry it took so long to get back to you. I was out of town, and my internet access was just enough to post roll.

Your post raised a good question, and one that I had intended to ask the members of KTC for their advice. What do you say to your spouse when you quit, when she didn't know you had the problem in the first place?

Well, I went ahead and told her this last weekend. We were on a family vacation, having a ton of fun and relaxing, entirely free from the normal stress of quotidian life. I decided that then would have been as good a time as any.

So I told her the truth... that I had had a nasty habit for the three years that we were married, that I hid it from her because I was embarrassed/ashamed, and that I had just recently quit.

She was upset, to be sure, but not fly-off-the-handle-get-ready-to-have-your-eyeballs-scratched-out upset. Just disappointment. But, she was also glad that I was quit. She asked if that explained my mood this past week, being irritable, short-tempered, etc. I said that it probably had something to do with it.

Anyways, I am glad I told her. Even if her reaction had been worse, I would still be glad. I was tired of lying to her about my habit, but it would have still been lying if I hadn't told her that I had taken up a new habit - Quitting.

[Cancrusher]

Hey brother, I've been keeping a close eye on you and the rest of October. You guys are my special project now that I'm on day 50, am clear of the heavy fog, and can begin to give back to this site which has given so much to me.

I have to say that I really sympathize with who you were. I too was a ninja dipper. My wife had no idea. Well, she'd caught me once/twice, but she had NO idea how deep the addiction ran. Who wants to admit something like that? I sure as hell didn't. "Hey hun, yeah, ummm...I'm severely addicted to worm/dirt/lip-turd/poison.

...Turns out, telling here was very instrumental to my quit. She was livid at first, sure. Her husband just told her that for the past 8 years he'd been lying to her. But you know what, after that initial shock, she was very excited for me. Now, on days like today (50), I openly share where I'm at with it and what day I'm on. She doesn't always care, and I don't rely on her for support (that's KTC's function), but knowing that she is proud from time to time is nice.

She also know that before I put that shit in my mouth again I will have had her sign the copy of the contract to give up that I keep in my wallet. That shit ain't gonna happen. Keep up the good quit brother!

This is just food for thought btw, I don't know if you've told her or not...I'm just sayin'. Take it or leave it.

[mule]

Thanks kdip!

Gotta admit, i'm getting hit pretty hard today. A ton of anxiety, panic attacks, etc. I tend to be a bit of a hypochondriac (the irony of putting cancer causing substances into my lip is not lost on me), and today is bad. I keep thinking i'm going to die, that I already have cancer, etc. Even though there is nothing in my mouth.

Ugh, not fun.

BUT, as horrible as it is, it is also pissing me off. Pissing me off that I did damage to my body for so long, pissing me off that I waited until now to quit, pissing me off that I didn't get pissed off sooner!!!

The pissed is giving the quit strengh. I'll take it. I can't wait to post roll call tomorrow morning!

just saw this....pissed is goooooooood

'Finger' UST

[klark]

Not sure where this should go, so I will try it in my introduction thread...

I'm going to out of internet range for the last part for a few days this week. I may be able to get some 3g reception on my phone, but I can't guarantee it. I don't want to miss roll call at any costs. I'm generally wary of giving out my number or asking other people for theirs, but screw it, the quit is worth it. Anyone willing to let me shoot you a text each morning an post roll call for me?

Thank You

Just sent you a PM.

[aabye1]

Not sure where this should go, so I will try it in my introduction thread...

I'm going to out of internet range for the last part for a few days this week. I may be able to get some 3g reception on my phone, but I can't guarantee it. I don't want to miss roll call at any costs. I'm generally wary of giving out my number or asking other people for theirs, but screw it, the quit is worth it. Anyone willing to let me shoot you a text each morning an post roll call for me?

Thank You

[Skoal Monster]

Thanks kdip!

Gotta admit, i'm getting hit pretty hard today.  A ton of anxiety, panic attacks, etc.  I tend to be a bit of a hypochondriac (the irony of putting cancer causing substances into my lip is not lost on me), and today is bad.  I keep thinking i'm going to die, that I already have cancer, etc.  Even though there is nothing in my mouth.

Ugh, not fun.

BUT, as horrible as it is, it is also pissing me off.  Pissing me off that I did damage to my body for so long, pissing me off that I waited until now to quit, pissing me off that I didn't get pissed off sooner!!!

The pissed is giving the quit strengh.  I'll take it.  I can't wait to post roll call tomorrow morning!

stay mad, They sold you a substance that when used properly and as directed kills you. They poisoned you. All the crazy stuff your feeling now is a direct result of being addicted to the most lethal substance on earth. ( Actually more toxic than snake venom ounce for ounce)

U got this , see you for day 2

sm