Addiction has destroyed my marriage

[FLLipOut]

Congrats on one year brother! You and I have text everyday for one year. It kept us both quit. Congrats on the new house and the one in the oven.

Man, I was browsing through some intros this morning and came across this. I was so hoping you stuck with it, then I read FF's update and it damn near brought me to tears. Proud to be quit with you, Mass. Damn proud.

LarryA 64

So proud of you, mass!

[LarryA]

Congrats on one year brother! You and I have text everyday for one year. It kept us both quit. Congrats on the new house and the one in the oven.

Man, I was browsing through some intros this morning and came across this. I was so hoping you stuck with it, then I read FF's update and it damn near brought me to tears. Proud to be quit with you, Mass. Damn proud.

LarryA 64

[FISHFLORIDA]

Congrats on one year brother! You and I have text everyday for one year. It kept us both quit. Congrats on the new house and the one in the oven.

[Dagranger]

Anyone else notice he didn't post roll? Guy cheats on his wife and yet welcomed with open arms.

I always thought posting roll was the price of admission, has this rule changed too?

Posting roll is the price of admission in the groups, not Intros. Splitting hairs? Maybe. But a lot of folks get their nudge to finally start posting roll after putting up an intro.

Mass - You are an addict. You have allowed your addiction to control your life and weasel your way in and out of many things, it sounds like. That's not judgement - just facts.

As a fellow addict, I know all of this to be true for most addicts. We will lie, cheat, and steal to serve whatever means results in that hit of dopamine. I'm glad you were honest with your wife and your therapist. I'm sure that was a bittersweet relief.

This place isn't therapy. This is a site for quitting nicotine with zero excuses or exceptions. You give your word, and you keep your word. Each and every day. It is an airtight promise that even the most shifty weasel addict can't worm his way out of.

If you're serious about tackling your addiction, and having some integrity in your life, put your name on roll. You will have more support and accountability than you could ever imagine to help you keep your word. But for now, it is 100% on you.

My sense has been that to a point you get some time to hash things out in intros, but then you either post roll or you've worn out your welcome.

If you are serious about quitting with us Mass, it's time to get on roll and make that promise. You wont regret it.

True words by CJ, and I concur with Tuco's logic regarding posting roll vs. intros.

What bothers me is all of the "atta boys" he has gotten without promising us or himself ANYTHING.

It's easy to say your are quitting - I told many people I was quitting at least 30 times in 17 years. It's quite another thing to make a promise to quit - and actually quit vs. a stoppage.

I'm rolling finally fellas - sorry and thanks for bearing with me! 8 Days thus far - i know it's going to be an uphill climb! Dealing with stress and a broken, upset, emotional pregnant wife, all from my actions, this is definitely going to be hard and def will need support - i appreciate the kind words and tough love! Let's kick this habit and start a new chapter!

Mass. Way to go. Tomorrow morning...same thing. Start stacking up one day promises. You'll be amazed how fast the days will add up. Good luck.

[Mass0426]

Anyone else notice he didn't post roll? Guy cheats on his wife and yet welcomed with open arms.

I always thought posting roll was the price of admission, has this rule changed too?

Posting roll is the price of admission in the groups, not Intros. Splitting hairs? Maybe. But a lot of folks get their nudge to finally start posting roll after putting up an intro.

Mass - You are an addict. You have allowed your addiction to control your life and weasel your way in and out of many things, it sounds like. That's not judgement - just facts.

As a fellow addict, I know all of this to be true for most addicts. We will lie, cheat, and steal to serve whatever means results in that hit of dopamine. I'm glad you were honest with your wife and your therapist. I'm sure that was a bittersweet relief.

This place isn't therapy. This is a site for quitting nicotine with zero excuses or exceptions. You give your word, and you keep your word. Each and every day. It is an airtight promise that even the most shifty weasel addict can't worm his way out of.

If you're serious about tackling your addiction, and having some integrity in your life, put your name on roll. You will have more support and accountability than you could ever imagine to help you keep your word. But for now, it is 100% on you.

My sense has been that to a point you get some time to hash things out in intros, but then you either post roll or you've worn out your welcome.

If you are serious about quitting with us Mass, it's time to get on roll and make that promise. You wont regret it.

True words by CJ, and I concur with Tuco's logic regarding posting roll vs. intros.

What bothers me is all of the "atta boys" he has gotten without promising us or himself ANYTHING.

It's easy to say your are quitting - I told many people I was quitting at least 30 times in 17 years. It's quite another thing to make a promise to quit - and actually quit vs. a stoppage.

I'm rolling finally fellas - sorry and thanks for bearing with me! 8 Days thus far - i know it's going to be an uphill climb! Dealing with stress and a broken, upset, emotional pregnant wife, all from my actions, this is definitely going to be hard and def will need support - i appreciate the kind words and tough love! Let's kick this habit and start a new chapter!

[Thumblewort]

Anyone else notice he didn't post roll? Guy cheats on his wife and yet welcomed with open arms.

I always thought posting roll was the price of admission, has this rule changed too?

Posting roll is the price of admission in the groups, not Intros. Splitting hairs? Maybe. But a lot of folks get their nudge to finally start posting roll after putting up an intro.

Mass - You are an addict. You have allowed your addiction to control your life and weasel your way in and out of many things, it sounds like. That's not judgement - just facts.

As a fellow addict, I know all of this to be true for most addicts. We will lie, cheat, and steal to serve whatever means results in that hit of dopamine. I'm glad you were honest with your wife and your therapist. I'm sure that was a bittersweet relief.

This place isn't therapy. This is a site for quitting nicotine with zero excuses or exceptions. You give your word, and you keep your word. Each and every day. It is an airtight promise that even the most shifty weasel addict can't worm his way out of.

If you're serious about tackling your addiction, and having some integrity in your life, put your name on roll. You will have more support and accountability than you could ever imagine to help you keep your word. But for now, it is 100% on you.

My sense has been that to a point you get some time to hash things out in intros, but then you either post roll or you've worn out your welcome.

If you are serious about quitting with us Mass, it's time to get on roll and make that promise. You wont regret it.

True words by CJ, and I concur with Tuco's logic regarding posting roll vs. intros.

What bothers me is all of the "atta boys" he has gotten without promising us or himself ANYTHING.

It's easy to say your are quitting - I told many people I was quitting at least 30 times in 17 years. It's quite another thing to make a promise to quit - and actually quit vs. a stoppage.

[ChristopherJ]

Anyone else notice he didn't post roll? Guy cheats on his wife and yet welcomed with open arms.

I always thought posting roll was the price of admission, has this rule changed too?

Posting roll is the price of admission in the groups, not Intros. Splitting hairs? Maybe. But a lot of folks get their nudge to finally start posting roll after putting up an intro.

Mass - You are an addict. You have allowed your addiction to control your life and weasel your way in and out of many things, it sounds like. That's not judgement - just facts.

As a fellow addict, I know all of this to be true for most addicts. We will lie, cheat, and steal to serve whatever means results in that hit of dopamine. I'm glad you were honest with your wife and your therapist. I'm sure that was a bittersweet relief.

This place isn't therapy. This is a site for quitting nicotine with zero excuses or exceptions. You give your word, and you keep your word. Each and every day. It is an airtight promise that even the most shifty weasel addict can't worm his way out of.

If you're serious about tackling your addiction, and having some integrity in your life, put your name on roll. You will have more support and accountability than you could ever imagine to help you keep your word. But for now, it is 100% on you.

My sense has been that to a point you get some time to hash things out in intros, but then you either post roll or you've worn out your welcome.

If you are serious about quitting with us Mass, it's time to get on roll and make that promise. You wont regret it.

[Tuco]

Anyone else notice he didn't post roll? Guy cheats on his wife and yet welcomed with open arms.

I always thought posting roll was the price of admission, has this rule changed too?

Posting roll is the price of admission in the groups, not Intros. Splitting hairs? Maybe. But a lot of folks get their nudge to finally start posting roll after putting up an intro.

Mass - You are an addict. You have allowed your addiction to control your life and weasel your way in and out of many things, it sounds like. That's not judgement - just facts.

As a fellow addict, I know all of this to be true for most addicts. We will lie, cheat, and steal to serve whatever means results in that hit of dopamine. I'm glad you were honest with your wife and your therapist. I'm sure that was a bittersweet relief.

This place isn't therapy. This is a site for quitting nicotine with zero excuses or exceptions. You give your word, and you keep your word. Each and every day. It is an airtight promise that even the most shifty weasel addict can't worm his way out of.

If you're serious about tackling your addiction, and having some integrity in your life, put your name on roll. You will have more support and accountability than you could ever imagine to help you keep your word. But for now, it is 100% on you.

[Thumblewort]

Anyone else notice he didn't post roll? Guy cheats on his wife and yet welcomed with open arms.

I always thought posting roll was the price of admission, has this rule changed too?

[Jjrva]

I'm a fellow guy who sprung this addiction on a pregnant wife, coupled with a few other lifestyle related arguments. It wasn't pretty but We are both at a point now that it is very good to have in the past. When I told her the other day I was over 160 days quit, she was happy. I felt so good to have opened up and fessed up about this awful addiction. And I know she wants the best for me.

You had a lot of things come crumbling down, but now is the time to rebuild. You can rebuild and prepare for this child as a clean, money saving, cancer preventing, responsible man. Something you wouldn't have done if your ninja ways had continued. As a smarter guy than I once posted, just remember that as much as life gets tough, at least you're going through it all without the nic.

Keep your head up and post roll every damn day.

[Slick]

Hang in there Mass.

You passed a few big hurdles. You came forward. You confessed, you got the drugs and gambling off your chest.



You are Fighting 2 demons at the same time. stay committed to your quit like you are committed to Christ and he will provide you that inner strength.

[kubiackalpha]

Everyone has been 100% spot on. So, instead of re iterating what they have said, I will tell you to grab a chair and hold on. You got a whirlwind of shite getting ready to happen mentally and physically. I don't sugar coat shite and I know a lot of guys on here want me to tone it back a bit because I scare people. HAHA! NOPE! 'na na' . Get yourself a ton of water. Drink it until you teeth float. Cranberry juice here and there will help. Get a small bit of Dark Chocolate. The Dark Chocolate is to help with mental stability. The darker the better. Dark Chocolate is the best known source of serotonin, easily accessible, fairly cheap, safe. The Cranberry and Water help get that shite out of your system and keeps you hydrated. Every morning, no matter your job, go walk for 20 minutes first thing every morning. That will elevate your natural serotonin levels and that will hold all day. Post daily. Quit Daily. Quit moment by moment if you have to. Just quit daily. Make it your priority. A short parable A man and a child were in the mans workshop and the child was annoying the man. The man gave her a pussle to put together of the world thinking it would take her forever because she has no idea what the world looks like. She came back a few minutes later with it put together. He asked how she did it. She show him on the other side of the puzzle was a man and since she knew what a man looked like the world fell into place. Same goes for you. Put yourself together. Make quitting your priority everyday and everything else will happen in time. Find 12 step/support groups for whatever else ales you. It will be good.

[Candoit]

Once you get roll down...

Quitting and Relationship Issues

That is a damn good thread to get some prospective and some ideas

[Bean]

Here is a link to the Quit Group instructions

http://www.killthecan.org/community/how ... tructions/

Post roll, keep your word and repeat. Nobody can change the past. What's done is done. But everybody makes mistakes...even big ones. Let yourself off the hook. Be the person you want to be EVERY DAMN DAY FROM NOW ON.

[KillTheCamel]

Wow, and I thought I was mind fucked by addiction. It takes real balls to show up here and lay down a post like that. I pray that you would find Christ's strength and forgiveness as you try to better yourself and salvage your marriage. One thing I will add is that you have to do this for yourself, not your wife, and not your baby. Heal yourself first and then some of the other things will come around. One day at a time you can do it through daily accountability, honesty, and professional help. Quit with you today now go post roll here. Ask if you need help but post your pledge not to use today and repeat tomorrow.

Post roll here