Quitting for the last time

[Buddy Mac]

So today, i had the case of the irritations. Everything irritated the fuck out of me. I tried pouring a glass of tea and it spilt. I thought in my head, FUCK, if i had a chew that wouldnt happen. I stubbed my tow on the bed, i thought to myself" That wouldnt happen if i was chewing". I went to get the mail and on my way back in to the house i dropped 3 pieces of mail and had to bend over to pick them up, fuck that pissed me off and i though" If i was chewing i wouldnt of dropped that. I went out to the garage and started rigging my duck decoys as i have 500 new decoys i have to have ready by october 1st and i thought" I could go faster if i had a chew in"!
Now, remember i am on day 4 so i get these stupid thoughts, I am smart enough to get them out of my mind and focus on something else. I just find it funny that an addicts brain finds positive in the most negative thing and negative in the most positive thing.
So, i started to keep track of things i did today that i havent done in years without a chew in my mouth. Going to get gas, walking in to a gas station and getting a coke minus the tin can!!!!!! Taking my morning crap. Working my hunting dog, sitting on the couch watching tv. etc etc. I had to think to my self, HOW WOULD OF HAVING A CHEW IN MY MOUTH MADE THIS ANY BETTER? And like i knew and thought, having a chew would of made it all worse and negative. FUCK CHEW, FUCK THE HORSE IT ROAD IN ON, AND FUCK ITS MOTHERS MOTHER!!!!
I also went through all my hiding spots today as i just got back into town late last night. I Pulled out 150 empty cans of pouches and put them out on the curb as tomorrow is garbage day. HOLY SHIT 5 months of addiction in the trash. I am having a hard time grasping why and how i am so fucking week to let that shit run and control my life. The more i think the madder i get the stronger my testimony to the quit gets. tomorrow is day 5 and before you know it will be day 10. Thanks for all you support and words gentlemen. We all need some harsh and kind words from our brotheren to keep us in the right direction.

DiverFreak

Diver,

Good stuff man. Had many days like that myself. Stay strong..

[Mthomas3824]

Diverfreak,

Like your style and quit with you today.

[diverfreak]

So today, i had the case of the irritations. Everything irritated the fuck out of me. I tried pouring a glass of tea and it spilt. I thought in my head, FUCK, if i had a chew that wouldnt happen.  I stubbed my tow on the bed, i thought to myself" That wouldnt happen if i was chewing".  I went to get the mail and on my way back in to the house i dropped 3 pieces of mail and had to bend over to pick them up, fuck that pissed me off and i though" If i was chewing i wouldnt of dropped that.  I went out to the garage and started rigging my duck decoys as i have 500 new decoys i have to have ready by october 1st and i thought" I could go faster if i had a chew in"!
  Now, remember i am on day 4 so i get these stupid thoughts, I am smart enough to get them out of my mind and focus on something else. I just find it funny that an addicts brain finds positive in the most negative thing and negative in the most positive thing. 
So, i started to keep track of things i did today that i havent done in years without a chew in my mouth. Going to get gas, walking in to a gas station and getting a coke minus the tin can!!!!!! Taking my morning crap. Working my hunting dog, sitting on the couch watching tv. etc etc. I had to think to my self, HOW WOULD OF HAVING A CHEW IN MY MOUTH MADE THIS ANY BETTER?  And like i knew and thought, having a chew would of made it all worse and negative. FUCK CHEW, FUCK THE HORSE IT ROAD IN ON, AND FUCK ITS MOTHERS MOTHER!!!!
I also went through all my hiding spots today as i just got back into town late last night. I  Pulled out 150 empty cans of pouches and put them out on the curb as tomorrow is garbage day. HOLY SHIT 5 months of addiction in the trash. I am having a hard time grasping why and how i am so fucking week to let that shit run and control my life. The more i think the madder i get the stronger my testimony to the quit gets. tomorrow is day 5 and before you know it will be day 10.  Thanks for all you support and words gentlemen. We all need some harsh and kind words from our brotheren to keep us in the right direction.

DiverFreak

Good on you man. You will need to look back at this entry at some point in your quit when the going gets tough. These kind of posts hold serious value because those are your words, not someone else's.

Just read in another thread something similar and the prevailing thought was that life is a trigger. Our addict brain could use anything in our day to day activities to induce a cave, that is how an addict brain operates. Guard your quit at all times because everything in your life could be a trigger, if you let it.

See you at roll, QLAFM

Day 6, i have this DICKED!!!!! Atleast for today. To be honest, quiting this sime has been easier than i thought. I am not saying it was a walk in the park but for me everything lined up perfect for this quit. I am sure 90% of it was finding this website. I have wanted to quit for ever but not bad enough to really do it. This time i said F it, i am so sick of the sore mouth, being a ninja, etc etc. I finally got to the point where chew was my worst enemy and when i hate someting that bad i find a way to get it out of my life.
For today i am quit, and today is a pretty Gosh Damned good day!


Diverfreak

[eric71]

So today, i had the case of the irritations. Everything irritated the fuck out of me. I tried pouring a glass of tea and it spilt. I thought in my head, FUCK, if i had a chew that wouldnt happen. I stubbed my tow on the bed, i thought to myself" That wouldnt happen if i was chewing". I went to get the mail and on my way back in to the house i dropped 3 pieces of mail and had to bend over to pick them up, fuck that pissed me off and i though" If i was chewing i wouldnt of dropped that. I went out to the garage and started rigging my duck decoys as i have 500 new decoys i have to have ready by october 1st and i thought" I could go faster if i had a chew in"!
Now, remember i am on day 4 so i get these stupid thoughts, I am smart enough to get them out of my mind and focus on something else. I just find it funny that an addicts brain finds positive in the most negative thing and negative in the most positive thing.
So, i started to keep track of things i did today that i havent done in years without a chew in my mouth. Going to get gas, walking in to a gas station and getting a coke minus the tin can!!!!!! Taking my morning crap. Working my hunting dog, sitting on the couch watching tv. etc etc. I had to think to my self, HOW WOULD OF HAVING A CHEW IN MY MOUTH MADE THIS ANY BETTER? And like i knew and thought, having a chew would of made it all worse and negative. FUCK CHEW, FUCK THE HORSE IT ROAD IN ON, AND FUCK ITS MOTHERS MOTHER!!!!
I also went through all my hiding spots today as i just got back into town late last night. I Pulled out 150 empty cans of pouches and put them out on the curb as tomorrow is garbage day. HOLY SHIT 5 months of addiction in the trash. I am having a hard time grasping why and how i am so fucking week to let that shit run and control my life. The more i think the madder i get the stronger my testimony to the quit gets. tomorrow is day 5 and before you know it will be day 10. Thanks for all you support and words gentlemen. We all need some harsh and kind words from our brotheren to keep us in the right direction.

DiverFreak

Good on you man. You will need to look back at this entry at some point in your quit when the going gets tough. These kind of posts hold serious value because those are your words, not someone else's.

Just read in another thread something similar and the prevailing thought was that life is a trigger. Our addict brain could use anything in our day to day activities to induce a cave, that is how an addict brain operates. Guard your quit at all times because everything in your life could be a trigger, if you let it.

See you at roll, QLAFM

[carumba10]

Some of the things we do and think about nicotine is both sad and funny.

Keep the updates coming !

Quit for today.

[diverfreak]

So today, i had the case of the irritations. Everything irritated the fuck out of me. I tried pouring a glass of tea and it spilt. I thought in my head, FUCK, if i had a chew that wouldnt happen. I stubbed my tow on the bed, i thought to myself" That wouldnt happen if i was chewing". I went to get the mail and on my way back in to the house i dropped 3 pieces of mail and had to bend over to pick them up, fuck that pissed me off and i though" If i was chewing i wouldnt of dropped that. I went out to the garage and started rigging my duck decoys as i have 500 new decoys i have to have ready by october 1st and i thought" I could go faster if i had a chew in"!
Now, remember i am on day 4 so i get these stupid thoughts, I am smart enough to get them out of my mind and focus on something else. I just find it funny that an addicts brain finds positive in the most negative thing and negative in the most positive thing.
So, i started to keep track of things i did today that i havent done in years without a chew in my mouth. Going to get gas, walking in to a gas station and getting a coke minus the tin can!!!!!! Taking my morning crap. Working my hunting dog, sitting on the couch watching tv. etc etc. I had to think to my self, HOW WOULD OF HAVING A CHEW IN MY MOUTH MADE THIS ANY BETTER? And like i knew and thought, having a chew would of made it all worse and negative. FUCK CHEW, FUCK THE HORSE IT ROAD IN ON, AND FUCK ITS MOTHERS MOTHER!!!!
I also went through all my hiding spots today as i just got back into town late last night. I Pulled out 150 empty cans of pouches and put them out on the curb as tomorrow is garbage day. HOLY SHIT 5 months of addiction in the trash. I am having a hard time grasping why and how i am so fucking week to let that shit run and control my life. The more i think the madder i get the stronger my testimony to the quit gets. tomorrow is day 5 and before you know it will be day 10. Thanks for all you support and words gentlemen. We all need some harsh and kind words from our brotheren to keep us in the right direction.

DiverFreak

[Roamcountry]

Diver that's exactly the way I felt this quit is so different. It's not a try. The word try has a hidden failure built in, a plan to cave! Being away from home and on the road beware of hidden triggers!

'clap' We QUIT! simple as that! Day 4, day 400, or day 4000, doesnt matter, what matters is today. We all go through the ups and downs of quit, somedays are great, others suck, I like your determination!

[Wt57]

Diver that's exactly the way I felt this quit is so different. It's not a try. The word try has a hidden failure built in, a plan to cave! Being away from home and on the road beware of hidden triggers!

[GR8WHITEBUFFALO]

One day at a time. One day at a time. Post, stay quit, repeat. If you think about buying a tin, go and read some of the true stories and look at the cancer pics first. Then get in the chat room to help you until the crave passes. It will pass, I promise. Stay tough and screw the nic bitch.

[diverfreak]

Well today is day 4. Wish i would was on day 400 but that will eventually come. I have tried to quit numerous times since my 2 year quit. I think what it boils down to is finally having enough and saying fuck it. I have quit 20 to 30 times in the last 3 years and made it 3 days and everytime i get to day 3 i buy a can and start chewing and tell my self, Dang i can quit any time, REALY? Got to love how your brain/addiction makes you believe stupid shit.
At any rate, i do believe i have my chewing addiction kicked for today! I would love to say for the rest of my life, but i am an addict and can only live one day at a time. I am doing and feeling better with this quit than i ever have. I am positive as i want to be quit and never have the devils dirt in my mouth ever again. I keep telling myself everytime i think of chewing" I dont CHEW", What is that crap any way"? It seems to be working.
I will post up in a few days to report on my quit!

Diverfreak

[DennyX]

+1 brother, well done. Let's kill this thing. Just have to make it till bedtime and it's in the books. PM me if you need anything at all. Hell, shoot me a text you've got my number.

Denny

[30yraddict]

good job on posting up in your quit group, diver.

Click above on the WELCOME CENTER on the above left and read about what roll call means, and how to post roll.

Welcome aboard.

[Deleted User (sccrockett)]

Made it back today, I put on my helmet, put on my sword, I ate a big bowl of wheaties and i am going to kick ass today! Thanks for your help. Judge me if you want but i wont judge you. I am here for moral support so i can kill the mother fucking cunt beast NICOTINE!!!! Day 1 in the trenches!!!



Diverfreak

Just my .02...

Make this thing real. Head over to November '12 and post roll. I'll see you there.

[diverfreak]

Made it back today, I put on my helmet, put on my sword, I ate a big bowl of wheaties and i am going to kick ass today! Thanks for your help. Judge me if you want but i wont judge you. I am here for moral support so i can kill the mother fucking cunt beast NICOTINE!!!! Day 1 in the trenches!!!



Diverfreak

[30yraddict]

no.

The word is NO.

It is THE word that will keep you quit.

NO I will not back down.

NO I will not sacrifice my dignity to grovel at the feet of nicotine.

NO I will not give up my freedom in exchange for slavery.

NO I will not sacrifice my integrity for the empty promise that is a crave.

NO I will not enrich the coffers of those whose wealth is built on the misery of others.

NO I will not let my family down

NO I will not contribute to my own early demise today.

HELL NO I will not ingest nicotine today.

Advice is here, Support is here. An ass kicking when necessary is here. The fortitude to say NO is up to you.