Strange thing happened today. I'm 61 days in and I was driving my 2 year old to the sitter this morning and had a craving on the way over. I should mention a few things. First since my cave I was a ninja dipper so my first chew every day was in the morning between dropping my son off and driving to work. 2nd, since my cave I have been petrified of caving again. Because of this fear I have literally carried my can of Smokey Mountain with me every where I go. It has replaced my can of Cope in that pocket morning, noon, and nigh.. In the past 4-6 week I have had roughly used it 4 times. Most of those after a beer or 2.
So there I am craving on the ride over and I figure once I drop the baby off I'll have a Smokey Mountain. So I walk in and do the normal niceties with the sitter and head out to the truck. When I get out there I think to myself, here we go, relief. Then as I start to reach into my pocket several other thoughts go through my head. I don't want to have to clean out my teeth, it's only a 10 minute ride, if I take one I'll drive the long way to work and waste gas. Oh hell, I guess I don't really want one and off I went with no Smokey Mountain.
For me this is another big step, I started to really think about what a choir it is to chew. It really is between finding cans, hiding the shit, trying to focus on traffic while you grasp for a can to spit in, having to find somewhere to spit it out and hope people don't see, then hit the bathroom to make sure you don't have any in your teeth before your first meeting.
I will continue to carry my can of Smokey Mountain until I feel I can leave it, but I really have no desire to chew it either. I wish I could say I was at that point that I despise chew and never ever want one again but I'm not there yet. Someday I know I will hate it and I will get there one day at a time.
I am taking baby steps and am proud of those steps. I wanted to document day 61 so I can look back on it someday!
Quit with all you other great quitters here! Have a great weekend (long weekend for some like myself!), and April if you are reading this, have a plan for this weekend! I do!
ScrewYouCope