Maybe someone here can relate. The last 2 months has been hell. If you have the time, please read this.
Here's a quick story about last year: A year ago I was rushed to the hospital one afternoon after having several PVCs (Premature Ventricular Contractions or when your heart skips a beat) and feeling like I was going to pass out; just feeling like complete shit. I had been dipping that day a lot. Basically I thought I was having a heart attack and was going to die. By the way I'm only 34 years old. I told the paramedics I had been dipping that day and all they did was say they did too and that I was fine. The doctors took my vitals, blood, ECG, etc. and sent me home telling me I had had an anxiety/panic attack and prescribed me Ativen and told me to lay off the diet pills I was taking. Everything was fine after that day until this past April.
I'm a high school teacher and stay athletic. I mountain bike, hike, jog almost daily, and eat fairly well. This past April was our school's spring break. The first Saturday I had off I visited a friend and stayed up until 3 am the next morning. I had been dipping heavily all night. I went home and got in bed only to find it took until 5:30 am to finally get to sleep. I felt like my heart was racing and felt like shit and I attributed it to an all night binge of dipping. I almost felt like I did a year ago. A few days later I went to another friends house to visit and stayed until 3 am again and had been dipping heavily all night only this time I felt like I did the year before and it wouldn't go away. I tried everything to calm down. My heart was beating fast, etc. This lasted all the way until 3 am the next morning. I freaked my wife out and myself. I finally went to the ER only to find out, you guessed it, diagnosed anxiety/panic. Again was given Ativen. Thus began my first quit day. I figured the dip wasn't helping things and I was sick and tired of feeling shitty all the time anyways. I had a full physical scheduled the following Friday. All they did was the typical "turn your head and cough" crap, took blood, and sent me on my way. Blood tests were normal etc. They then referred me to a Psychiatric doc who put me on 5mg doses of Lexapro daily.
For the first weeks following my last binge dipping night I couldn't sleep at all. For the past 50 days I've had weird symptoms of all sorts. Flushed feeling in my heart and chest, light chest pain, nausea, the feeling like something's taking my breath away, PVCs, fatigue, sleepiness, lack of sleep some nights. All of which don't happen consistently but come and go and it's driving me mad. I wish I could enjoy the fact I've been 50 days dip free but all I can think is I'm dying and it's because of chew. FOr me the quitting has been easy because all I can think about is getting through the next day of these crazy-assed symptoms.
Does anyone else feel this way?? I don't know if it's the Lexapro or withdrawl symptoms. The doctors are oblivious and it pisses me off. I'll bring up chew and they don't care. What is happening to me!
