Mthomastherapy

[Mthomas3824]

Day 203

The following is dialogue between mthomas and Mrs. Thomas.
Mthomas: You know KTC is like therapy and rehab but there comes a time where you need to leave the hospital and live your life.

Mrs Thomas: What the hell are you talking about?

Mthomas: I am talking about KTC. I have spent a lot of time on the site but I think I am ready to leave. Time to live my life outside of the site.

Mrs Thomas: First that is a bad analogy for KTC. Second, it sounds like you are preparing to cave and want to hide from your brothers.

Mthomas: Not true. I just need to leave the hospital. When I post daily, I think about tobacco. I want to get to a point where I can wake up and never think about nicotine. KTC makes me think about tobacco.

Mrs Thomas: Hmm

Mthomas: You don't see my point?

Mrs Thomas: Aren't you the one who tells me, "If it ain't broke don't fix it?" You have been quit for 200 days. Seems like nothing is broke and you want to break it.

Mthomas: Maybe I just got bored but I want to see if I can do it on my own now.

Mrs Thomas: What is marriage? It is a commitment to each other. I'm here for you and you are here for me. We both make mistakes but usually at different times. I have always been here for you and you for me. KTC is a promise. Your supporters are there for you and you are there for them. If I were you, just keep positing roll. If you are bored, just post roll and leave the site but never abandon the brothers that count on you because they haven't bailed on you. Right?

Mthomas: Right. You know your stuff.

Mrs Thomas: You are an addict. Nicotine is going to be in your mind daily. Either you post and say, I am quit...or you don't post and temptation comes to seduce you without your "Armor" as you call it.

So thinking about our conversation, Froman calls me and bam, it hits me. I wanted to cave but I wanted to do it honorably. There is no honor in a cave. No matter what, when you cave you feel like shit.

I am posting roll to 365 days and will keep my 100% posting record because. I am quit and I love my Freedom

Nicotine found a back door open in my mind. Thanks to all those that cared enough to help me stay quit. To my KTC brotherhood. You are my armor and shield to fight my addiction. I appreciate the support and I am sorry for thinking to bail on you. I have a second wind and I am back!!!!

[TSNUS]

Thanks for the reminder MT, day 2 or day 200 we need to use the tools given, post roll every day with your word to quit, and reaching out when you need to.

Quit with you every day and proud of you man.

[eric71]

Way to stay strong and not be lured back to the dark side....

That nic bitch is a sneaky stinking hoe and she will keep whispering to you .... thats why this site is the best when those things happen and they do you can always reach out to a quit brother and keep the sneaky bitch from getting her hooks back into you!

I have reached 238 days and there is still temptation out there for me but now I have some serious weapons to use against the bitch, things like resolve and determination along with what this site brings which is pride! Pride in giving my promise and keeping it, not letting anything get in the way of my quit!

Keep on keeping on brother and remember you have my number use it when needed!

Grizzly25...out

Just spoke with Froman and texting WT. I am back to basic. Post roll, keep my word only worry about today and repeat. That has kept me quit through a shit storm of craving.

Hell if it works, why change it up.

This works.

Glad to have you as a quit brother MT and proud as hell of you making it through the time of trial in the city of sin.

QLAFM

[Mthomas3824]

Way to stay strong and not be lured back to the dark side....

That nic bitch is a sneaky stinking hoe and she will keep whispering to you .... thats why this site is the best when those things happen and they do you can always reach out to a quit brother and keep the sneaky bitch from getting her hooks back into you!

I have reached 238 days and there is still temptation out there for me but now I have some serious weapons to use against the bitch, things like resolve and determination along with what this site brings which is pride! Pride in giving my promise and keeping it, not letting anything get in the way of my quit!

Keep on keeping on brother and remember you have my number use it when needed!

Grizzly25...out

Just spoke with Froman and texting WT. I am back to basic. Post roll, keep my word only worry about today and repeat. That has kept me quit through a shit storm of craving.

Hell if it works, why change it up.

This works.

[Grizzly25]

Way to stay strong and not be lured back to the dark side....

That nic bitch is a sneaky stinking hoe and she will keep whispering to you .... thats why this site is the best when those things happen and they do you can always reach out to a quit brother and keep the sneaky bitch from getting her hooks back into you!

I have reached 238 days and there is still temptation out there for me but now I have some serious weapons to use against the bitch, things like resolve and determination along with what this site brings which is pride! Pride in giving my promise and keeping it, not letting anything get in the way of my quit!

Keep on keeping on brother and remember you have my number use it when needed!

Grizzly25...out

[Mthomas3824]

Day 201

Without you guys I would have caved like a little bitch this week!!!! Thanks for your texts of support, calls, and staying in my head. I needed it. I thought I was an all star quitter....I am just an addict. You guys that texted me and kept me on task. You are my all stars. You carried me and I can't thank you enough.

Work got crazy with the mine expo in Vegas. I had to prepare and ship our goods, fly in early to set it up a large exhibit, work the 3 day show and then tear it down. It was a shit ton of work and a success. Much like my two hernia surgeries. It was painful but glad I did it.

So now being back a day, I reflect on my quit. My 200 days was yesterday and I have been thinking a lot. Is my quit to a point where I shouldn't post because it makes me think about dipping?????

Vegas was my real true test of being in the elements, alone and having all the shit thrown in my face. From Alcohol, cigarettes and while sitting outside the Venitian, some poor girl was soliciting me to take her to my room. I was disturbed that I would even look like someone you could approach and offer sex to, let alone people I knew offering me alcohol and nicotine. I admire the people that have put up with it being around you daily.

I have tons of stories of temptation, justifying a cave, then getting a text or a call at the very moment I may fall....wow, its almost like my KTC friends could sense that a call or text was what I needed.

So Las Vegas sucks and I am glad that the next mining convention is four years away. Hopefully we will have grown to a point where I send employees to set up and tear down and I only need to be there for the show.

To all that have it around you, please know that I respect your battle. Caving still is not an action that gets any justification. I passed 200 days and it gets better and temptations are few and far but there are going to be some longing calls to seduce you back to the nic bitch. However, after the battle, it feels great to post 201 vs. 1. I prefer the feelings of 201 over day 1.

Stay in the fight and win your match today. We worry about tomorrow when it comes....

[Mthomas3824]

Mark,

I have been running at least 1 mile a day since getting to Phoenix. When I return home, I may or may not be shipped out again. But, let's get together for lunch and plan a good work out regime. Even if it's just down in the basement, or going for a run, I am with you. Shit, get a mountain bike and go biking with me. Whatever you want. Exercise comes in many ways, so let's get going!!! I get back at the beginning of October. We can even have a biggest loser contest to get a good jump on it. We could even wrestle if ya want, but I'm not wearing no f'ing leotard and head gear!!! 'exercise'

oh I want pictures.... 'Bond'

'crackup'

I want pictures too! I heard mark wrestles in the nude! That's what Blake said!! Now both of you wearing nothing! LMAO
See Day 162

:ph43r: (Blake) 'nhl2'

I wrastle in the nude, but only for charity events. The only wrestling I can do now is thumb wrestling. I'm in for the gym, mountain biking. I orderd the forklift to get my fat ass of the couch. Eric has me doing 3workouts this week an next Saturday Scotty an I are going to hike lone peak.

When you are in town, let's be like rocky in Russia. Pulling up a net of heavy rocks, choping wood and shit, raping cattle, and climbing a mountain peak!

Let's get addicted to our health!

[Wt57]

Mark,

I have been running at least 1 mile a day since getting to Phoenix. When I return home, I may or may not be shipped out again. But, let's get together for lunch and plan a good work out regime. Even if it's just down in the basement, or going for a run, I am with you. Shit, get a mountain bike and go biking with me. Whatever you want. Exercise comes in many ways, so let's get going!!! I get back at the beginning of October. We can even have a biggest loser contest to get a good jump on it. We could even wrestle if ya want, but I'm not wearing no f'ing leotard and head gear!!! 'exercise'

oh I want pictures.... 'Bond'

'crackup'

I want pictures too! I heard mark wrestles in the nude! That's what Blake said!! Now both of you wearing nothing! LMAO
See Day 162

:ph43r: (Blake) 'nhl2'

[SirDerek]

Mark,

I have been running at least 1 mile a day since getting to Phoenix. When I return home, I may or may not be shipped out again. But, let's get together for lunch and plan a good work out regime. Even if it's just down in the basement, or going for a run, I am with you. Shit, get a mountain bike and go biking with me. Whatever you want. Exercise comes in many ways, so let's get going!!! I get back at the beginning of October. We can even have a biggest loser contest to get a good jump on it. We could even wrestle if ya want, but I'm not wearing no f'ing leotard and head gear!!! 'exercise'

oh I want pictures.... 'Bond'

'crackup'

[dr_jones_25]

Mark,

I have been running at least 1 mile a day since getting to Phoenix. When I return home, I may or may not be shipped out again. But, let's get together for lunch and plan a good work out regime. Even if it's just down in the basement, or going for a run, I am with you. Shit, get a mountain bike and go biking with me. Whatever you want. Exercise comes in many ways, so let's get going!!! I get back at the beginning of October. We can even have a biggest loser contest to get a good jump on it. We could even wrestle if ya want, but I'm not wearing no f'ing leotard and head gear!!! 'exercise'

[Grizzly25]

177 days nicotine free and alcohol free

I rarely very rarely feel the burden of craves for nicotine.  Don't get me wrong, on occasion the thought crosses my mind to dip but it is pretty easy to dismiss and not a battle like it once was.  However I realized that even though I have the formula to quit nicotine and have been quit for 177 days and it seems easy.  I had a moment of self disgust and loathing today.

I am an addict!

When I quit Nicotine, I quit alcohol.  I knew that If I quit nic, it would be easy and probable that I would increase drinking to compensate for my quit of nic and that was a dangerous thought.  Then I went and posted roll on KTP.  I didn't think I had a porn addiction but looked at the pic's of the day on this site and it ended with me seeing vaginas and boobs on my ipad.  So I caved and started a day one again.  Fortunately, I now have over 20 days quit on porn.

Yeah good for me, I quit nic, alcohol and porn.  You know what.  I am disgusted.  I looked down at a doughnut I was eating today and I felt the same as I did when I saw my final can of chew.  "Why am I eating this?  I don't want it, I don't need it but here I am stuffing my fat fucking face!" 

When I quit chewing tobacco, I weighed 182 pounds.  Today, 177 days later, I weigh 212 pounds.  I gained 30 pounds!  I keep saying that I am going to go to the gym but I don't.  I am going to control when and what I eat but I don't....

I am an addict!!!

To truly treat our addictions we can't replace one bad habit with another.  So for a moment I felt great but now I face the reality that I simply replace one addiction with another. 

For me the long term battle about staying quit is figuring out how to bridal my addiction not to seek pleasure that destroys.  Since we all have addiction in common.  Ask yourself,  "Since I quit tobacco, have I increased my Drinking Alcohol, Looking at Porn, Gambling, over eating and gaining weight?"  If so, how do we move our addiction to productive and good things?

Fuck the Billion Dollar Tobacco Industry!  I hate them because I became addicted to their product and risked cancer for the stupid pleasure of a buzz. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Alcohol Industry!  Alcohol abuse is a root cause of many ruined marriages, job loss and absent fathers. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Porn Industry! Most of the "Models" in porn are currently or have suffered abuse.  Our fantasies if we looked at them for the reality they are will draw the conclusion that looking at titties and vaginas perpetuates the abuse and you are contributing to the problem.  Also, if you have a wife, you are hurting her self worth and esteem by participating in that practice.

Food is necessary but as much as I like Ice Cream, Doughnuts, soda and Cereal.  I have to control it! 

All this garbage is at our finger tips and everywhere we go.  So Addiction comes in all formats and we as addicts need to display more self control than ever. 

Nicotine, Alcohol, Porn and Pop are all vices I quit.  All those variable pleasure triggers now is laser focused on food.  My war isn't over.  I am 212 lbs. I am going to put my efforts, rage and passion into working out.  I will report back when I weigh 202. 

Even making that statement scares me like committing to quit dip.  Guys quitting chew becomes easy, just replace your addiction with good things or your vices will change but you still will not be free.

This is how I feel after being quit for 177 days.  I am free from nicotine and the burden of being quit and off nicotine is AWESOME!  However, today I acknowledge that I am not free.  My addiction latched on to food consumption and I am getting my ass kicked!

Great post bud. I echo your sentiments on all subjects covered. Like you, I have put on a ton of weight since I quit dipping. Between 15-20 lbs in 101 days. I am constantly cramming food in my face and I consume more alcohol than I ever did when I was dipping. It's funny b/c although my battle with nic has been a winning one thus far, I have flat out lost control in other areas. My self esteem isn't at it's highest point ever and I feel a lot of frustration towards my behavior and my refusal thus far to really change much even though I recognize it. Almost every day I find a reason not to excercise and to drink beer instead. I have begun posting just this week in the alcohol slowdown group and it has kept me from drinking for 3 days so far. It hasn't been easy. Last night I cursed myself for posting there when I realized the Cowboy/Giant game was on. I was furious. Why? Because I couldn't drink? Stupid. The sun still comes up the next day. Like you I am going to work very hard towards changing the way I am living my life. Thanks for the inspiration!

Mthomas I remember 2 or 3 months ago you told me when the nicotine was under control other things would fall into place. I agree that when the nicotine is manageable there are other thing to work on. I have lost control or given control to the bitch for so long now learning to live nic free is a whole life makeover! I posted this yesterday in general discussion.

At day 158 I've been contemplating some experiences on KTC.  My experience of quitting dip is only a portion of my time here.  I have met some wonderful people, enjoyed some great times dealing with addiction, I've learned so much about myself, I've started pulling out of my secret life.  Some of the non-nic forums have helped me face other issues which needed to be addressed along with quitting dip.  This is a life altering experience!
Thank you!!

So now we recognize the areas we have to work on. They will take the same determination as quitting dip!
So the battles go on

Good Good Stuff brothers. Being able to look at yourself honestly, is life changing. Our stories are so similar to each other that it is eerie. Thanks for posting MT. The fight goes on...indeed WT, indeed. Im glad you phags are around here. :wub:

True that. May we alway fight and battle together. I will stay quit and gay with you all!

Eric71. Thanks for the call. I am ready and feeling excited about the workouts. Thanks for helping me.

Glad we talked, only wish I'd had the chance to read your initial post before we spoke. I feel a couple of the comments I made, although tongue in cheek, were on the verge of inappropriate. That being said, for addicts to gain a handle on addiction, they often temporarily resort to another pleasure trigger. The key takeaway from that is "temporarily". We then have to strategically eliminate that pleasure, if it is unhealthy, by reinforcing a positive behavior, like working out. It is by doing this, and establishing this as a new trigger, that we can then go to work on the elimination of a problem like overeating. I do not think you have a problem, I think you have a compensation that became a habit and now you no longer need as much compensation but are finding it hard to break the habit of indulgent eating. It is a cycle, it is an addiction. It is fixable and what we outlined last night over the phone is a step toward the direction you want your life to go. I am here with you every step of the way and will do everything in my power to ensure your success.

Always proud to be quit with the likes of you!

This whole process has made me reevaluate my entire life and it is clear to me now that I am addicted to many many things. Caffene, sugars and fats, tv and internet sites (social and adult), nicotine, endorphins, adrenalin, sodium and alcohol. All of these thing provide my body with a rush. Some will always be with me because they are biproducts of a heathier lifestyle (endorphins, adrenalin) others belong to a lifestyle that is not working to get me where I want to be in the end which is a happier, heathier person and will continue to battle them daily.

Great stuff guys!

The original post by mthomas was and is spot on, I say keep bettering yourself!

My life makeover has been good and bad but when I look back it is all good just with some very tough trials that I needed to go thru to get better and be better!

Thanks mthomas for putting into words what many of us think but dont have the means or writing ability to say!

[GR8WHITEBUFFALO]

177 days nicotine free and alcohol free

I rarely very rarely feel the burden of craves for nicotine.  Don't get me wrong, on occasion the thought crosses my mind to dip but it is pretty easy to dismiss and not a battle like it once was.  However I realized that even though I have the formula to quit nicotine and have been quit for 177 days and it seems easy.  I had a moment of self disgust and loathing today.

I am an addict!

When I quit Nicotine, I quit alcohol.  I knew that If I quit nic, it would be easy and probable that I would increase drinking to compensate for my quit of nic and that was a dangerous thought.  Then I went and posted roll on KTP.  I didn't think I had a porn addiction but looked at the pic's of the day on this site and it ended with me seeing vaginas and boobs on my ipad.  So I caved and started a day one again.  Fortunately, I now have over 20 days quit on porn.

Yeah good for me, I quit nic, alcohol and porn.  You know what.  I am disgusted.  I looked down at a doughnut I was eating today and I felt the same as I did when I saw my final can of chew.  "Why am I eating this?  I don't want it, I don't need it but here I am stuffing my fat fucking face!" 

When I quit chewing tobacco, I weighed 182 pounds.  Today, 177 days later, I weigh 212 pounds.  I gained 30 pounds!  I keep saying that I am going to go to the gym but I don't.  I am going to control when and what I eat but I don't....

I am an addict!!!

To truly treat our addictions we can't replace one bad habit with another.  So for a moment I felt great but now I face the reality that I simply replace one addiction with another. 

For me the long term battle about staying quit is figuring out how to bridal my addiction not to seek pleasure that destroys.  Since we all have addiction in common.  Ask yourself,  "Since I quit tobacco, have I increased my Drinking Alcohol, Looking at Porn, Gambling, over eating and gaining weight?"  If so, how do we move our addiction to productive and good things?

Fuck the Billion Dollar Tobacco Industry!  I hate them because I became addicted to their product and risked cancer for the stupid pleasure of a buzz. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Alcohol Industry!  Alcohol abuse is a root cause of many ruined marriages, job loss and absent fathers. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Porn Industry! Most of the "Models" in porn are currently or have suffered abuse.  Our fantasies if we looked at them for the reality they are will draw the conclusion that looking at titties and vaginas perpetuates the abuse and you are contributing to the problem.  Also, if you have a wife, you are hurting her self worth and esteem by participating in that practice.

Food is necessary but as much as I like Ice Cream, Doughnuts, soda and Cereal.  I have to control it! 

All this garbage is at our finger tips and everywhere we go.  So Addiction comes in all formats and we as addicts need to display more self control than ever. 

Nicotine, Alcohol, Porn and Pop are all vices I quit.  All those variable pleasure triggers now is laser focused on food.  My war isn't over.  I am 212 lbs. I am going to put my efforts, rage and passion into working out.  I will report back when I weigh 202. 

Even making that statement scares me like committing to quit dip.  Guys quitting chew becomes easy, just replace your addiction with good things or your vices will change but you still will not be free.

This is how I feel after being quit for 177 days.  I am free from nicotine and the burden of being quit and off nicotine is AWESOME!  However, today I acknowledge that I am not free.  My addiction latched on to food consumption and I am getting my ass kicked!

Great post bud. I echo your sentiments on all subjects covered. Like you, I have put on a ton of weight since I quit dipping. Between 15-20 lbs in 101 days. I am constantly cramming food in my face and I consume more alcohol than I ever did when I was dipping. It's funny b/c although my battle with nic has been a winning one thus far, I have flat out lost control in other areas. My self esteem isn't at it's highest point ever and I feel a lot of frustration towards my behavior and my refusal thus far to really change much even though I recognize it. Almost every day I find a reason not to excercise and to drink beer instead. I have begun posting just this week in the alcohol slowdown group and it has kept me from drinking for 3 days so far. It hasn't been easy. Last night I cursed myself for posting there when I realized the Cowboy/Giant game was on. I was furious. Why? Because I couldn't drink? Stupid. The sun still comes up the next day. Like you I am going to work very hard towards changing the way I am living my life. Thanks for the inspiration!

Mthomas I remember 2 or 3 months ago you told me when the nicotine was under control other things would fall into place. I agree that when the nicotine is manageable there are other thing to work on. I have lost control or given control to the bitch for so long now learning to live nic free is a whole life makeover! I posted this yesterday in general discussion.

At day 158 I've been contemplating some experiences on KTC.  My experience of quitting dip is only a portion of my time here.  I have met some wonderful people, enjoyed some great times dealing with addiction, I've learned so much about myself, I've started pulling out of my secret life.  Some of the non-nic forums have helped me face other issues which needed to be addressed along with quitting dip.  This is a life altering experience!
Thank you!!

So now we recognize the areas we have to work on. They will take the same determination as quitting dip!
So the battles go on

Good Good Stuff brothers. Being able to look at yourself honestly, is life changing. Our stories are so similar to each other that it is eerie. Thanks for posting MT. The fight goes on...indeed WT, indeed. Im glad you phags are around here. :wub:

True that. May we alway fight and battle together. I will stay quit and gay with you all!

Eric71. Thanks for the call. I am ready and feeling excited about the workouts. Thanks for helping me.

Glad we talked, only wish I'd had the chance to read your initial post before we spoke. I feel a couple of the comments I made, although tongue in cheek, were on the verge of inappropriate. That being said, for addicts to gain a handle on addiction, they often temporarily resort to another pleasure trigger. The key takeaway from that is "temporarily". We then have to strategically eliminate that pleasure, if it is unhealthy, by reinforcing a positive behavior, like working out. It is by doing this, and establishing this as a new trigger, that we can then go to work on the elimination of a problem like overeating. I do not think you have a problem, I think you have a compensation that became a habit and now you no longer need as much compensation but are finding it hard to break the habit of indulgent eating. It is a cycle, it is an addiction. It is fixable and what we outlined last night over the phone is a step toward the direction you want your life to go. I am here with you every step of the way and will do everything in my power to ensure your success.

Always proud to be quit with the likes of you!

This whole process has made me reevaluate my entire life and it is clear to me now that I am addicted to many many things. Caffene, sugars and fats, tv and internet sites (social and adult), nicotine, endorphins, adrenalin, sodium and alcohol. All of these thing provide my body with a rush. Some will always be with me because they are biproducts of a heathier lifestyle (endorphins, adrenalin) others belong to a lifestyle that is not working to get me where I want to be in the end which is a happier, heathier person and will continue to battle them daily.

[GR8WHITEBUFFALO]

177 days nicotine free and alcohol free

I rarely very rarely feel the burden of craves for nicotine.  Don't get me wrong, on occasion the thought crosses my mind to dip but it is pretty easy to dismiss and not a battle like it once was.  However I realized that even though I have the formula to quit nicotine and have been quit for 177 days and it seems easy.  I had a moment of self disgust and loathing today.

I am an addict!

When I quit Nicotine, I quit alcohol.  I knew that If I quit nic, it would be easy and probable that I would increase drinking to compensate for my quit of nic and that was a dangerous thought.  Then I went and posted roll on KTP.  I didn't think I had a porn addiction but looked at the pic's of the day on this site and it ended with me seeing vaginas and boobs on my ipad.  So I caved and started a day one again.  Fortunately, I now have over 20 days quit on porn.

Yeah good for me, I quit nic, alcohol and porn.  You know what.  I am disgusted.  I looked down at a doughnut I was eating today and I felt the same as I did when I saw my final can of chew.  "Why am I eating this?  I don't want it, I don't need it but here I am stuffing my fat fucking face!" 

When I quit chewing tobacco, I weighed 182 pounds.  Today, 177 days later, I weigh 212 pounds.  I gained 30 pounds!  I keep saying that I am going to go to the gym but I don't.  I am going to control when and what I eat but I don't....

I am an addict!!!

To truly treat our addictions we can't replace one bad habit with another.  So for a moment I felt great but now I face the reality that I simply replace one addiction with another. 

For me the long term battle about staying quit is figuring out how to bridal my addiction not to seek pleasure that destroys.  Since we all have addiction in common.  Ask yourself,  "Since I quit tobacco, have I increased my Drinking Alcohol, Looking at Porn, Gambling, over eating and gaining weight?"  If so, how do we move our addiction to productive and good things?

Fuck the Billion Dollar Tobacco Industry!  I hate them because I became addicted to their product and risked cancer for the stupid pleasure of a buzz. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Alcohol Industry!  Alcohol abuse is a root cause of many ruined marriages, job loss and absent fathers. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Porn Industry! Most of the "Models" in porn are currently or have suffered abuse.  Our fantasies if we looked at them for the reality they are will draw the conclusion that looking at titties and vaginas perpetuates the abuse and you are contributing to the problem.  Also, if you have a wife, you are hurting her self worth and esteem by participating in that practice.

Food is necessary but as much as I like Ice Cream, Doughnuts, soda and Cereal.  I have to control it! 

All this garbage is at our finger tips and everywhere we go.  So Addiction comes in all formats and we as addicts need to display more self control than ever. 

Nicotine, Alcohol, Porn and Pop are all vices I quit.  All those variable pleasure triggers now is laser focused on food.  My war isn't over.  I am 212 lbs. I am going to put my efforts, rage and passion into working out.  I will report back when I weigh 202. 

Even making that statement scares me like committing to quit dip.  Guys quitting chew becomes easy, just replace your addiction with good things or your vices will change but you still will not be free.

This is how I feel after being quit for 177 days.  I am free from nicotine and the burden of being quit and off nicotine is AWESOME!  However, today I acknowledge that I am not free.  My addiction latched on to food consumption and I am getting my ass kicked!

Great post bud. I echo your sentiments on all subjects covered. Like you, I have put on a ton of weight since I quit dipping. Between 15-20 lbs in 101 days. I am constantly cramming food in my face and I consume more alcohol than I ever did when I was dipping. It's funny b/c although my battle with nic has been a winning one thus far, I have flat out lost control in other areas. My self esteem isn't at it's highest point ever and I feel a lot of frustration towards my behavior and my refusal thus far to really change much even though I recognize it. Almost every day I find a reason not to excercise and to drink beer instead. I have begun posting just this week in the alcohol slowdown group and it has kept me from drinking for 3 days so far. It hasn't been easy. Last night I cursed myself for posting there when I realized the Cowboy/Giant game was on. I was furious. Why? Because I couldn't drink? Stupid. The sun still comes up the next day. Like you I am going to work very hard towards changing the way I am living my life. Thanks for the inspiration!

Mthomas I remember 2 or 3 months ago you told me when the nicotine was under control other things would fall into place. I agree that when the nicotine is manageable there are other thing to work on. I have lost control or given control to the bitch for so long now learning to live nic free is a whole life makeover! I posted this yesterday in general discussion.

At day 158 I've been contemplating some experiences on KTC.  My experience of quitting dip is only a portion of my time here.  I have met some wonderful people, enjoyed some great times dealing with addiction, I've learned so much about myself, I've started pulling out of my secret life.  Some of the non-nic forums have helped me face other issues which needed to be addressed along with quitting dip.  This is a life altering experience!
Thank you!!

So now we recognize the areas we have to work on. They will take the same determination as quitting dip!
So the battles go on

Good Good Stuff brothers. Being able to look at yourself honestly, is life changing. Our stories are so similar to each other that it is eerie. Thanks for posting MT. The fight goes on...indeed WT, indeed. Im glad you phags are around here. :wub:

True that. May we alway fight and battle together. I will stay quit and gay with you all!

Eric71. Thanks for the call. I am ready and feeling excited about the workouts. Thanks for helping me.

Glad we talked, only wish I'd had the chance to read your initial post before we spoke. I feel a couple of the comments I made, although tongue in cheek, were on the verge of inappropriate. That being said, for addicts to gain a handle on addiction, they often temporarily resort to another pleasure trigger. The key takeaway from that is "temporarily". We then have to strategically eliminate that pleasure, if it is unhealthy, by reinforcing a positive behavior, like working out. It is by doing this, and establishing this as a new trigger, that we can then go to work on the elimination of a problem like overeating. I do not think you have a problem, I think you have a compensation that became a habit and now you no longer need as much compensation but are finding it hard to break the habit of indulgent eating. It is a cycle, it is an addiction. It is fixable and what we outlined last night over the phone is a step toward the direction you want your life to go. I am here with you every step of the way and will do everything in my power to ensure your success.

Always proud to be quit with the likes of you!

This whole process has made me reevaluate my entire life and it is clear to me now that I am addicted to many many things. Caffene, sugars and fats, tv and internet sites (social and adult), nicotine, endorphins, adrenalin, sodium and alcohol. All of these thing provide my body with a rush. Some will always be with me because they are biproducts of a heathier lifestyle (endorphins, adrenalin) others belong to a lifestyle that is not working to get me where I want to be in the end which is a happier, heathier person and will continue to battle them daily.

[eric71]

177 days nicotine free and alcohol free

I rarely very rarely feel the burden of craves for nicotine.  Don't get me wrong, on occasion the thought crosses my mind to dip but it is pretty easy to dismiss and not a battle like it once was.  However I realized that even though I have the formula to quit nicotine and have been quit for 177 days and it seems easy.  I had a moment of self disgust and loathing today.

I am an addict!

When I quit Nicotine, I quit alcohol.  I knew that If I quit nic, it would be easy and probable that I would increase drinking to compensate for my quit of nic and that was a dangerous thought.  Then I went and posted roll on KTP.  I didn't think I had a porn addiction but looked at the pic's of the day on this site and it ended with me seeing vaginas and boobs on my ipad.  So I caved and started a day one again.  Fortunately, I now have over 20 days quit on porn.

Yeah good for me, I quit nic, alcohol and porn.  You know what.  I am disgusted.  I looked down at a doughnut I was eating today and I felt the same as I did when I saw my final can of chew.  "Why am I eating this?  I don't want it, I don't need it but here I am stuffing my fat fucking face!" 

When I quit chewing tobacco, I weighed 182 pounds.  Today, 177 days later, I weigh 212 pounds.  I gained 30 pounds!  I keep saying that I am going to go to the gym but I don't.  I am going to control when and what I eat but I don't....

I am an addict!!!

To truly treat our addictions we can't replace one bad habit with another.  So for a moment I felt great but now I face the reality that I simply replace one addiction with another. 

For me the long term battle about staying quit is figuring out how to bridal my addiction not to seek pleasure that destroys.  Since we all have addiction in common.  Ask yourself,  "Since I quit tobacco, have I increased my Drinking Alcohol, Looking at Porn, Gambling, over eating and gaining weight?"  If so, how do we move our addiction to productive and good things?

Fuck the Billion Dollar Tobacco Industry!  I hate them because I became addicted to their product and risked cancer for the stupid pleasure of a buzz. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Alcohol Industry!  Alcohol abuse is a root cause of many ruined marriages, job loss and absent fathers. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Porn Industry! Most of the "Models" in porn are currently or have suffered abuse.  Our fantasies if we looked at them for the reality they are will draw the conclusion that looking at titties and vaginas perpetuates the abuse and you are contributing to the problem.  Also, if you have a wife, you are hurting her self worth and esteem by participating in that practice.

Food is necessary but as much as I like Ice Cream, Doughnuts, soda and Cereal.  I have to control it! 

All this garbage is at our finger tips and everywhere we go.  So Addiction comes in all formats and we as addicts need to display more self control than ever. 

Nicotine, Alcohol, Porn and Pop are all vices I quit.  All those variable pleasure triggers now is laser focused on food.  My war isn't over.  I am 212 lbs. I am going to put my efforts, rage and passion into working out.  I will report back when I weigh 202. 

Even making that statement scares me like committing to quit dip.  Guys quitting chew becomes easy, just replace your addiction with good things or your vices will change but you still will not be free.

This is how I feel after being quit for 177 days.  I am free from nicotine and the burden of being quit and off nicotine is AWESOME!  However, today I acknowledge that I am not free.  My addiction latched on to food consumption and I am getting my ass kicked!

Great post bud. I echo your sentiments on all subjects covered. Like you, I have put on a ton of weight since I quit dipping. Between 15-20 lbs in 101 days. I am constantly cramming food in my face and I consume more alcohol than I ever did when I was dipping. It's funny b/c although my battle with nic has been a winning one thus far, I have flat out lost control in other areas. My self esteem isn't at it's highest point ever and I feel a lot of frustration towards my behavior and my refusal thus far to really change much even though I recognize it. Almost every day I find a reason not to excercise and to drink beer instead. I have begun posting just this week in the alcohol slowdown group and it has kept me from drinking for 3 days so far. It hasn't been easy. Last night I cursed myself for posting there when I realized the Cowboy/Giant game was on. I was furious. Why? Because I couldn't drink? Stupid. The sun still comes up the next day. Like you I am going to work very hard towards changing the way I am living my life. Thanks for the inspiration!

Mthomas I remember 2 or 3 months ago you told me when the nicotine was under control other things would fall into place. I agree that when the nicotine is manageable there are other thing to work on. I have lost control or given control to the bitch for so long now learning to live nic free is a whole life makeover! I posted this yesterday in general discussion.

At day 158 I've been contemplating some experiences on KTC.  My experience of quitting dip is only a portion of my time here.  I have met some wonderful people, enjoyed some great times dealing with addiction, I've learned so much about myself, I've started pulling out of my secret life.  Some of the non-nic forums have helped me face other issues which needed to be addressed along with quitting dip.  This is a life altering experience!
Thank you!!

So now we recognize the areas we have to work on. They will take the same determination as quitting dip!
So the battles go on

Good Good Stuff brothers. Being able to look at yourself honestly, is life changing. Our stories are so similar to each other that it is eerie. Thanks for posting MT. The fight goes on...indeed WT, indeed. Im glad you phags are around here. :wub:

True that. May we alway fight and battle together. I will stay quit and gay with you all!

Eric71. Thanks for the call. I am ready and feeling excited about the workouts. Thanks for helping me.

Glad we talked, only wish I'd had the chance to read your initial post before we spoke. I feel a couple of the comments I made, although tongue in cheek, were on the verge of inappropriate. That being said, for addicts to gain a handle on addiction, they often temporarily resort to another pleasure trigger. The key takeaway from that is "temporarily". We then have to strategically eliminate that pleasure, if it is unhealthy, by reinforcing a positive behavior, like working out. It is by doing this, and establishing this as a new trigger, that we can then go to work on the elimination of a problem like overeating. I do not think you have a problem, I think you have a compensation that became a habit and now you no longer need as much compensation but are finding it hard to break the habit of indulgent eating. It is a cycle, it is an addiction. It is fixable and what we outlined last night over the phone is a step toward the direction you want your life to go. I am here with you every step of the way and will do everything in my power to ensure your success.

Always proud to be quit with the likes of you!

[Mthomas3824]

177 days nicotine free and alcohol free

I rarely very rarely feel the burden of craves for nicotine.  Don't get me wrong, on occasion the thought crosses my mind to dip but it is pretty easy to dismiss and not a battle like it once was.  However I realized that even though I have the formula to quit nicotine and have been quit for 177 days and it seems easy.  I had a moment of self disgust and loathing today.

I am an addict!

When I quit Nicotine, I quit alcohol.  I knew that If I quit nic, it would be easy and probable that I would increase drinking to compensate for my quit of nic and that was a dangerous thought.  Then I went and posted roll on KTP.  I didn't think I had a porn addiction but looked at the pic's of the day on this site and it ended with me seeing vaginas and boobs on my ipad.  So I caved and started a day one again.  Fortunately, I now have over 20 days quit on porn.

Yeah good for me, I quit nic, alcohol and porn.  You know what.  I am disgusted.  I looked down at a doughnut I was eating today and I felt the same as I did when I saw my final can of chew.  "Why am I eating this?  I don't want it, I don't need it but here I am stuffing my fat fucking face!" 

When I quit chewing tobacco, I weighed 182 pounds.  Today, 177 days later, I weigh 212 pounds.  I gained 30 pounds!  I keep saying that I am going to go to the gym but I don't.  I am going to control when and what I eat but I don't....

I am an addict!!!

To truly treat our addictions we can't replace one bad habit with another.  So for a moment I felt great but now I face the reality that I simply replace one addiction with another. 

For me the long term battle about staying quit is figuring out how to bridal my addiction not to seek pleasure that destroys.  Since we all have addiction in common.  Ask yourself,  "Since I quit tobacco, have I increased my Drinking Alcohol, Looking at Porn, Gambling, over eating and gaining weight?"  If so, how do we move our addiction to productive and good things?

Fuck the Billion Dollar Tobacco Industry!  I hate them because I became addicted to their product and risked cancer for the stupid pleasure of a buzz. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Alcohol Industry!  Alcohol abuse is a root cause of many ruined marriages, job loss and absent fathers. 

Fuck the Billion Dollar Porn Industry! Most of the "Models" in porn are currently or have suffered abuse.  Our fantasies if we looked at them for the reality they are will draw the conclusion that looking at titties and vaginas perpetuates the abuse and you are contributing to the problem.  Also, if you have a wife, you are hurting her self worth and esteem by participating in that practice.

Food is necessary but as much as I like Ice Cream, Doughnuts, soda and Cereal.  I have to control it! 

All this garbage is at our finger tips and everywhere we go.  So Addiction comes in all formats and we as addicts need to display more self control than ever. 

Nicotine, Alcohol, Porn and Pop are all vices I quit.  All those variable pleasure triggers now is laser focused on food.  My war isn't over.  I am 212 lbs. I am going to put my efforts, rage and passion into working out.  I will report back when I weigh 202. 

Even making that statement scares me like committing to quit dip.  Guys quitting chew becomes easy, just replace your addiction with good things or your vices will change but you still will not be free.

This is how I feel after being quit for 177 days.  I am free from nicotine and the burden of being quit and off nicotine is AWESOME!  However, today I acknowledge that I am not free.  My addiction latched on to food consumption and I am getting my ass kicked!

Great post bud. I echo your sentiments on all subjects covered. Like you, I have put on a ton of weight since I quit dipping. Between 15-20 lbs in 101 days. I am constantly cramming food in my face and I consume more alcohol than I ever did when I was dipping. It's funny b/c although my battle with nic has been a winning one thus far, I have flat out lost control in other areas. My self esteem isn't at it's highest point ever and I feel a lot of frustration towards my behavior and my refusal thus far to really change much even though I recognize it. Almost every day I find a reason not to excercise and to drink beer instead. I have begun posting just this week in the alcohol slowdown group and it has kept me from drinking for 3 days so far. It hasn't been easy. Last night I cursed myself for posting there when I realized the Cowboy/Giant game was on. I was furious. Why? Because I couldn't drink? Stupid. The sun still comes up the next day. Like you I am going to work very hard towards changing the way I am living my life. Thanks for the inspiration!

Mthomas I remember 2 or 3 months ago you told me when the nicotine was under control other things would fall into place. I agree that when the nicotine is manageable there are other thing to work on. I have lost control or given control to the bitch for so long now learning to live nic free is a whole life makeover! I posted this yesterday in general discussion.

At day 158 I've been contemplating some experiences on KTC.  My experience of quitting dip is only a portion of my time here.  I have met some wonderful people, enjoyed some great times dealing with addiction, I've learned so much about myself, I've started pulling out of my secret life.  Some of the non-nic forums have helped me face other issues which needed to be addressed along with quitting dip.  This is a life altering experience!
Thank you!!

So now we recognize the areas we have to work on. They will take the same determination as quitting dip!
So the battles go on

Good Good Stuff brothers. Being able to look at yourself honestly, is life changing. Our stories are so similar to each other that it is eerie. Thanks for posting MT. The fight goes on...indeed WT, indeed. Im glad you phags are around here. :wub:

True that. May we alway fight and battle together. I will stay quit and gay with you all!

Eric71. Thanks for the call. I am ready and feeling excited about the workouts. Thanks for helping me.