Mthomastherapy

[Ready]

day 267
Many text today from quitters.  With the exception of one.  We all are finding that we aren't doing well.  I've been in a place like this before.  You know what I'm not going to do.  Go back to that can of poison.  Not today.  I may be in pain.  It's not physical pain, it's worse.  It's a pain of grief, feeling lost, thinking I'm going in the right direction but standing in place. 

I want to break through this pain, then again, maybe I don't.
Maybe I fear the greatness in me an don't want to climb too high because the higher you go, the greater the fall, or fail.  Then again, maybe I want to keep climbing to see if there is a limit I can go.  I bet the views up there are spectacular, then again, maybe I'm afraid of heights.

I don't fight a craving for nicotine.  I really don't crave it.  What I fight now is a need to feel comfort.  Like the times I felt when I was alone to my thoughts with a dip in. 

I think about dipping just to ease my pain, my loneliness.  Then again, I think of the day that I looked at my new bought can of skoal and realized the control and power it had over me. 

So I decide to that I would rather fight through this pain, or live with it.  Even this is better than where I was on day 1.  I am still undefeated with nicotine.  Some wins were ugly but They were wins.  Well hell, enough thinking, I'm going to the gym.  I may be gay but I'm still quit.  For today, winning that match is all I need to call it a good day. 

I'm still kicking your ass nic bitch.  Score is 267 - 0.  I'm not the only undefeated dumbass here.  In fact being undefeated actually exposes my intelligence.  I once was blinded by your lies. Now I see and never want to lose my sight on living in reality again.  Bring on the pain!  Once I find joy, I'll have more value for it because I know pain.  I still win if I stay quit.

Every single day is a win. I know I will never stop fighting and neither will you.

1640-0 with the help and motivation of quitters like you Mark. Thanks for all you do for me and others here.

QLAFM

It will get better.

[eric71]

day 267
Many text today from quitters.  With the exception of one.  We all are finding that we aren't doing well.  I've been in a place like this before.  You know what I'm not going to do.  Go back to that can of poison.  Not today.  I may be in pain.  It's not physical pain, it's worse.  It's a pain of grief, feeling lost, thinking I'm going in the right direction but standing in place. 

I want to break through this pain, then again, maybe I don't.
Maybe I fear the greatness in me an don't want to climb too high because the higher you go, the greater the fall, or fail.  Then again, maybe I want to keep climbing to see if there is a limit I can go.  I bet the views up there are spectacular, then again, maybe I'm afraid of heights.

I don't fight a craving for nicotine.  I really don't crave it.  What I fight now is a need to feel comfort.  Like the times I felt when I was alone to my thoughts with a dip in. 

I think about dipping just to ease my pain, my loneliness.  Then again, I think of the day that I looked at my new bought can of skoal and realized the control and power it had over me. 

So I decide to that I would rather fight through this pain, or live with it.  Even this is better than where I was on day 1.  I am still undefeated with nicotine.  Some wins were ugly but They were wins.  Well hell, enough thinking, I'm going to the gym.  I may be gay but I'm still quit.  For today, winning that match is all I need to call it a good day. 

I'm still kicking your ass nic bitch.  Score is 267 - 0.  I'm not the only undefeated dumbass here.  In fact being undefeated actually exposes my intelligence.  I once was blinded by your lies. Now I see and never want to lose my sight on living in reality again.  Bring on the pain!  Once I find joy, I'll have more value for it because I know pain.  I still win if I stay quit.

Every single day is a win. I know I will never stop fighting and neither will you.

1640-0 with the help and motivation of quitters like you Mark. Thanks for all you do for me and others here.

QLAFM

[Tsmith17]

day 267
Many text today from quitters. With the exception of one. We all are finding that we aren't doing well. I've been in a place like this before. You know what I'm not going to do. Go back to that can of poison. Not today. I may be in pain. It's not physical pain, it's worse. It's a pain of grief, feeling lost, thinking I'm going in the right direction but standing in place.

I want to break through this pain, then again, maybe I don't.
Maybe I fear the greatness in me an don't want to climb too high because the higher you go, the greater the fall, or fail. Then again, maybe I want to keep climbing to see if there is a limit I can go. I bet the views up there are spectacular, then again, maybe I'm afraid of heights.

I don't fight a craving for nicotine. I really don't crave it. What I fight now is a need to feel comfort. Like the times I felt when I was alone to my thoughts with a dip in.

I think about dipping just to ease my pain, my loneliness. Then again, I think of the day that I looked at my new bought can of skoal and realized the control and power it had over me.

So I decide to that I would rather fight through this pain, or live with it. Even this is better than where I was on day 1. I am still undefeated with nicotine. Some wins were ugly but They were wins. Well hell, enough thinking, I'm going to the gym. I may be gay but I'm still quit. For today, winning that match is all I need to call it a good day.

I'm still kicking your ass nic bitch. Score is 267 - 0. I'm not the only undefeated dumbass here. In fact being undefeated actually exposes my intelligence. I once was blinded by your lies. Now I see and never want to lose my sight on living in reality again. Bring on the pain! Once I find joy, I'll have more value for it because I know pain. I still win if I stay quit.

Every single day is a win. I know I will never stop fighting and neither will you.

[Mthomas3824]

day 267
Many text today from quitters. With the exception of one. We all are finding that we aren't doing well. I've been in a place like this before. You know what I'm not going to do. Go back to that can of poison. Not today. I may be in pain. It's not physical pain, it's worse. It's a pain of grief, feeling lost, thinking I'm going in the right direction but standing in place.

I want to break through this pain, then again, maybe I don't.
Maybe I fear the greatness in me an don't want to climb too high because the higher you go, the greater the fall, or fail. Then again, maybe I want to keep climbing to see if there is a limit I can go. I bet the views up there are spectacular, then again, maybe I'm afraid of heights.

I don't fight a craving for nicotine. I really don't crave it. What I fight now is a need to feel comfort. Like the times I felt when I was alone to my thoughts with a dip in.

I think about dipping just to ease my pain, my loneliness. Then again, I think of the day that I looked at my new bought can of skoal and realized the control and power it had over me.

So I decide to that I would rather fight through this pain, or live with it. Even this is better than where I was on day 1. I am still undefeated with nicotine. Some wins were ugly but They were wins. Well hell, enough thinking, I'm going to the gym. I may be gay but I'm still quit. For today, winning that match is all I need to call it a good day.

I'm still kicking your ass nic bitch. Score is 267 - 0. I'm not the only undefeated dumbass here. In fact being undefeated actually exposes my intelligence. I once was blinded by your lies. Now I see and never want to lose my sight on living in reality again. Bring on the pain! Once I find joy, I'll have more value for it because I know pain. I still win if I stay quit.

[Mjollnir]

I am quit today.

I may be hurting right now because I have to live life without returning to the vomit of nic, porn and overeating.  I understand that I'm in a rage! 

I realize that because people out there helped me to realize it.  NOLAQ planted the seed, many that cared enough to let me know I was out of line but tolerated my personal battle to break through the hurting and no addiction to fall back on.  Then Roamcountry encouraged that seed to grow. 

That's what is great about this site and why I love KTC.  I desire and I want to be better.  Quitting nicotine is hard.  Quit nicotine and after the hall, add to it KTP. 

My walk isn't easy.  It's a road less traveled but those I walk with, I want to be like. 

I am not selfish very often.  I ask for tolerance because I can't help others until I can get past this by helping myself. 

What do I need, I need to feel valued.  Mocking me, calling me a cunt, telling me to go.  I ask with hat in hand....do you know how much that hurts me?  If other great quitters get treated like this, I would guess they aren't here to say that it wasn't tough love, it is cruel. 

I have three older teenagers.  All 3 respond differently to motivation, discipline, positive or negative reinforcement. 

I'm not trying to tear this house down.  I'm shouting that there is some clutter here and we should keep a cleaner house! 

I see that I will not have the last word here. 

I think KTC can do better. 

I think I can do better. 

I need to feel better but I don't know how.  No nic, no porn.  I don't want to feel numb.  Once I get past this, I will be grateful for the suck.

My house is glass.  So is yours.  We are all hypocrites. 

I am trying to clean my house and be more organized.  I invite you mods and admins to tiddy up the KTC house and get a dust pan.  Dirt under the carpet, just sweep it up. 

It may be hard be we are quitters and embrace the suck.  Right?

Houses like the people come in all shapes and sizes,

I can completely understand the feeling however if you look at all of the sucessful ventures, businesses and such throughout the world, you will see that the great strength comes from the diversity that is allowed to exist within the neighborhood.

So yes, there will always be those, 'across the tracks', and the 'red light districts', and as I have seen throughout my days here at KTC is the mentality of take what you can and leave the rest.....I think this can fit this situation in absolute, as it is more of a life lesson and not just involving the quit of nicotene.

So as I build my house, I want the strengths from all around, that may not mean to let any of the 'undesirables' inside of my house, but by certainly having it around it always keeps me aware of what it out there.

Be strong my friend and I quit today with you, and ask me when we wake and I will tell you the same thing.

Well said D. (As always). I quit with both of you BADASSES. Today, and everyday. QLAFM

Do better? Perfection is a pursuit, not a goal. Yes, there is always room for improvement. The question is, in a society like this, "What can I contribute?".

[jaginvest]

I am quit today.

I may be hurting right now because I have to live life without returning to the vomit of nic, porn and overeating.  I understand that I'm in a rage! 

I realize that because people out there helped me to realize it.  NOLAQ planted the seed, many that cared enough to let me know I was out of line but tolerated my personal battle to break through the hurting and no addiction to fall back on.  Then Roamcountry encouraged that seed to grow. 

That's what is great about this site and why I love KTC.  I desire and I want to be better.  Quitting nicotine is hard.  Quit nicotine and after the hall, add to it KTP. 

My walk isn't easy.  It's a road less traveled but those I walk with, I want to be like. 

I am not selfish very often.  I ask for tolerance because I can't help others until I can get past this by helping myself. 

What do I need, I need to feel valued.  Mocking me, calling me a cunt, telling me to go.  I ask with hat in hand....do you know how much that hurts me?  If other great quitters get treated like this, I would guess they aren't here to say that it wasn't tough love, it is cruel. 

I have three older teenagers.  All 3 respond differently to motivation, discipline, positive or negative reinforcement. 

I'm not trying to tear this house down.  I'm shouting that there is some clutter here and we should keep a cleaner house! 

I see that I will not have the last word here. 

I think KTC can do better. 

I think I can do better. 

I need to feel better but I don't know how.  No nic, no porn.  I don't want to feel numb.  Once I get past this, I will be grateful for the suck.

My house is glass.  So is yours.  We are all hypocrites. 

I am trying to clean my house and be more organized.  I invite you mods and admins to tiddy up the KTC house and get a dust pan.  Dirt under the carpet, just sweep it up. 

It may be hard be we are quitters and embrace the suck.  Right?

Houses like the people come in all shapes and sizes,

I can completely understand the feeling however if you look at all of the sucessful ventures, businesses and such throughout the world, you will see that the great strength comes from the diversity that is allowed to exist within the neighborhood.

So yes, there will always be those, 'across the tracks', and the 'red light districts', and as I have seen throughout my days here at KTC is the mentality of take what you can and leave the rest.....I think this can fit this situation in absolute, as it is more of a life lesson and not just involving the quit of nicotene.

So as I build my house, I want the strengths from all around, that may not mean to let any of the 'undesirables' inside of my house, but by certainly having it around it always keeps me aware of what it out there.

Be strong my friend and I quit today with you, and ask me when we wake and I will tell you the same thing.

Well said D. (As always). I quit with both of you BADASSES. Today, and everyday. QLAFM

[SirDerek]

I am quit today.

I may be hurting right now because I have to live life without returning to the vomit of nic, porn and overeating. I understand that I'm in a rage!

I realize that because people out there helped me to realize it. NOLAQ planted the seed, many that cared enough to let me know I was out of line but tolerated my personal battle to break through the hurting and no addiction to fall back on. Then Roamcountry encouraged that seed to grow.

That's what is great about this site and why I love KTC. I desire and I want to be better. Quitting nicotine is hard. Quit nicotine and after the hall, add to it KTP.

My walk isn't easy. It's a road less traveled but those I walk with, I want to be like.

I am not selfish very often. I ask for tolerance because I can't help others until I can get past this by helping myself.

What do I need, I need to feel valued. Mocking me, calling me a cunt, telling me to go. I ask with hat in hand....do you know how much that hurts me? If other great quitters get treated like this, I would guess they aren't here to say that it wasn't tough love, it is cruel.

I have three older teenagers. All 3 respond differently to motivation, discipline, positive or negative reinforcement.

I'm not trying to tear this house down. I'm shouting that there is some clutter here and we should keep a cleaner house!

I see that I will not have the last word here.

I think KTC can do better.

I think I can do better.

I need to feel better but I don't know how. No nic, no porn. I don't want to feel numb. Once I get past this, I will be grateful for the suck.

My house is glass. So is yours. We are all hypocrites.

I am trying to clean my house and be more organized. I invite you mods and admins to tiddy up the KTC house and get a dust pan. Dirt under the carpet, just sweep it up.

It may be hard be we are quitters and embrace the suck. Right?

Houses like the people come in all shapes and sizes,

I can completely understand the feeling however if you look at all of the sucessful ventures, businesses and such throughout the world, you will see that the great strength comes from the diversity that is allowed to exist within the neighborhood.

So yes, there will always be those, 'across the tracks', and the 'red light districts', and as I have seen throughout my days here at KTC is the mentality of take what you can and leave the rest.....I think this can fit this situation in absolute, as it is more of a life lesson and not just involving the quit of nicotene.

So as I build my house, I want the strengths from all around, that may not mean to let any of the 'undesirables' inside of my house, but by certainly having it around it always keeps me aware of what it out there.

Be strong my friend and I quit today with you, and ask me when we wake and I will tell you the same thing.

[Mthomas3824]

I am quit today.

I may be hurting right now because I have to live life without returning to the vomit of nic, porn and overeating. I understand that I'm in a rage!

I realize that because people out there helped me to realize it. NOLAQ planted the seed, many that cared enough to let me know I was out of line but tolerated my personal battle to break through the hurting and no addiction to fall back on. Then Roamcountry encouraged that seed to grow.

That's what is great about this site and why I love KTC. I desire and I want to be better. Quitting nicotine is hard. Quit nicotine and after the hall, add to it KTP.

My walk isn't easy. It's a road less traveled but those I walk with, I want to be like.

I am not selfish very often. I ask for tolerance because I can't help others until I can get past this by helping myself.

What do I need, I need to feel valued. Mocking me, calling me a cunt, telling me to go. I ask with hat in hand....do you know how much that hurts me? If other great quitters get treated like this, I would guess they aren't here to say that it wasn't tough love, it is cruel.

I have three older teenagers. All 3 respond differently to motivation, discipline, positive or negative reinforcement.

I'm not trying to tear this house down. I'm shouting that there is some clutter here and we should keep a cleaner house!

I see that I will not have the last word here.

I think KTC can do better.

I think I can do better.

I need to feel better but I don't know how. No nic, no porn. I don't want to feel numb. Once I get past this, I will be grateful for the suck.

My house is glass. So is yours. We are all hypocrites.

I am trying to clean my house and be more organized. I invite you mods and admins to tiddy up the KTC house and get a dust pan. Dirt under the carpet, just sweep it up.

It may be hard be we are quitters and embrace the suck. Right?

[loot]

3.....

[30yraddict]

MT, let me ask, have you helped a new quitter or any quitter today?  Have you reached out to one of the guys on day 2 who used to spend his Saturday's with a turd in the entire day who wants to rip someone's head off?  Do you remember that feeling? 

Did you ever think this site was created by someone or a group?  Many people who wanted to do good for others?  It did not magically appear, Loot and others spent a lot of time building this so you and I could get help.  Loot is not here to see if someone will get mad, he wants to see people stay clean.  You taking shots at him about posting clean is childish, you bring up other situations that honestly have nothing to do with you or many of us. 

If you don't want to help someone else, perfectly fine, I got no issue with anyone who posts roll for accountability then leaves.  But if you want to stay longer than that why don't you do something other than complain about others.

Here's a thought, how about you forge a bond with someone outside of your group, someone who someday could help you out of the funk you are in.  How about you stop blaming others, do something constructive or if you can't do that, just don't say anything.  There are a whole bunch of quitter between day 1 and 6,750 who could use some support getting through the next hour.  It's been about you here long enough, go make it about someone else.

Loots a prick, mthomas is selfish...blah blah blah, everyone shut up and let's get back to quitting. I think this kinda crap in the intro threads just polutes and could hurt a fresh quit


Yea I says it

Bruce

Ding ding ding, we have a winner.

Roam and I met for dinner tonight. Bruce we talked about you. You can't help but like Bruce.

I can quit chew but I can't quit you Bruce.

Brokeback Mountain 2. Coming to a theater near you.

Staring Bruce, MT and Roam. "it ain't ghey if it's a 3 way".

I was not going to post here as it is evident that this needs to die for the good of the quitters both current and prospective. However, the hypocrisy in your last post pushed me over the edge.

Mthomas: You are not a casual bystander in this - you own at least part of the blame. Don't try to pass it off as otherwise. All of your comments posted in the past couple of days were about YOU having a dispute with an admin. They were about how YOU were pissed off. They were not tempered with any regard for how it would affect other people's quit. The same morning that you pretend to take the high road here, you spread more discord in other threads.

Move on if you must, but if you stay focus on helping others quit and stay that way. Staying and continuing to cause division is not an option.

[Mthomas3824]

MT, let me ask, have you helped a new quitter or any quitter today?  Have you reached out to one of the guys on day 2 who used to spend his Saturday's with a turd in the entire day who wants to rip someone's head off?  Do you remember that feeling? 

Did you ever think this site was created by someone or a group?  Many people who wanted to do good for others?  It did not magically appear, Loot and others spent a lot of time building this so you and I could get help.  Loot is not here to see if someone will get mad, he wants to see people stay clean.  You taking shots at him about posting clean is childish, you bring up other situations that honestly have nothing to do with you or many of us. 

If you don't want to help someone else, perfectly fine, I got no issue with anyone who posts roll for accountability then leaves.  But if you want to stay longer than that why don't you do something other than complain about others.

Here's a thought, how about you forge a bond with someone outside of your group, someone who someday could help you out of the funk you are in.  How about you stop blaming others, do something constructive or if you can't do that, just don't say anything.  There are a whole bunch of quitter between day 1 and 6,750 who could use some support getting through the next hour.  It's been about you here long enough, go make it about someone else.

Loots a prick, mthomas is selfish...blah blah blah, everyone shut up and let's get back to quitting. I think this kinda crap in the intro threads just polutes and could hurt a fresh quit


Yea I says it

Bruce

Ding ding ding, we have a winner.

Roam and I met for dinner tonight. Bruce we talked about you. You can't help but like Bruce.

I can quit chew but I can't quit you Bruce.

Brokeback Mountain 2. Coming to a theater near you.

Staring Bruce, MT and Roam. "it ain't ghey if it's a 3 way".

[Bruce]

MT, let me ask, have you helped a new quitter or any quitter today? Have you reached out to one of the guys on day 2 who used to spend his Saturday's with a turd in the entire day who wants to rip someone's head off? Do you remember that feeling?

Did you ever think this site was created by someone or a group? Many people who wanted to do good for others? It did not magically appear, Loot and others spent a lot of time building this so you and I could get help. Loot is not here to see if someone will get mad, he wants to see people stay clean. You taking shots at him about posting clean is childish, you bring up other situations that honestly have nothing to do with you or many of us.

If you don't want to help someone else, perfectly fine, I got no issue with anyone who posts roll for accountability then leaves. But if you want to stay longer than that why don't you do something other than complain about others.

Here's a thought, how about you forge a bond with someone outside of your group, someone who someday could help you out of the funk you are in. How about you stop blaming others, do something constructive or if you can't do that, just don't say anything. There are a whole bunch of quitter between day 1 and 6,750 who could use some support getting through the next hour. It's been about you here long enough, go make it about someone else.

Loots a prick, mthomas is selfish...blah blah blah, everyone shut up and let's get back to quitting. I think this kinda crap in the intro threads just polutes and could hurt a fresh quit


Yea I says it

[klark]

MT, let me ask, have you helped a new quitter or any quitter today? Have you reached out to one of the guys on day 2 who used to spend his Saturday's with a turd in the entire day who wants to rip someone's head off? Do you remember that feeling?

Did you ever think this site was created by someone or a group? Many people who wanted to do good for others? It did not magically appear, Loot and others spent a lot of time building this so you and I could get help. Loot is not here to see if someone will get mad, he wants to see people stay clean. You taking shots at him about posting clean is childish, you bring up other situations that honestly have nothing to do with you or many of us.

If you don't want to help someone else, perfectly fine, I got no issue with anyone who posts roll for accountability then leaves. But if you want to stay longer than that why don't you do something other than complain about others.

Here's a thought, how about you forge a bond with someone outside of your group, someone who someday could help you out of the funk you are in. How about you stop blaming others, do something constructive or if you can't do that, just don't say anything. There are a whole bunch of quitter between day 1 and 6,750 who could use some support getting through the next hour. It's been about you here long enough, go make it about someone else.

[Skoal Monster]

While it is common knowledge that Loot wears baby blue spandex pants, a cape, and a lone ranger mask while he parades around the neighborhood, He is not infact a superhero. He is a quitter just like you and just like me. He is one hell of a quitter however.

I owe alot of my success to Loot. His words, to me, his texts, and his phone calls. Saved my ass on more than one occasion. I wouldn't be here without Loot and guys like him. Anyone I ever helped owes Loot

Ever wonder why a perfect stranger like Loot would reach out to others for years on end to help them overcome this shit? Ever wonder what kind of toll that takes on a guy when he sees so many he wants to help fall by the wayside. That's fucking special. That deserves spandex and a cape. Thats fucking work my friend, and it is work that has literally saved lives. This guy IS a fucking super hero.

Loot's no internet Troll, Loot is a backbone of this site. The folks that helped you quit , including me were helped by Loot. But keep in mind Mt, nobody's perfect, you don't get to hold Loot to a higher standard, Loot's job is thankless, but you should thank Loot anyway.

I posted this in a reply to a pm today, and I think it is something you should think about.

Be the change you wish to see in the world, or in this case the site. STOP trying to tear it down MT, instead try to make it better, ( here). If you want things to be different, then set that example here. Teach the newbs the way you think is right.
Creating a ruckus and trying to divide this house is unproductive.

For the record- I am the original keyboard gorilla, I am a troll of epic proportions, well versed in internet wizardry, I cannot be banned.......from any site. I would gladly give up my color to be held to a lower standard to defend this house.

And I stand shoulder to shoulder with Loot, and the rest of the Admin on this one.

sM

[RAZD611]

MT.... You may not agree with everything Loot does or says, you my not understand his ways or motives, But I will ask you to step back and see two things.

1. They work and are nothing but best intentions.
2. Your quit is stronger because of them.

Personally I want you to stick around just to know you are quit. I don't care if you like me or not, you can dispise me with a passion, this is not a popularity contest for us. Deep inside I know this place and its system work and I really think you do to.

Nic is the fight. Quit is the prize. Keep your eye on the prize.

Trees ................ :blink: ...................Forest