Caver, im back

[nick-Otine Free]

Day 47 here, and I'm having cravings stronger than ever before, my addict mind dreams of a smoke or dip, all damn day.  It is my promise that I make every morning to my brothers that keeps me straight, but I will tell you, the fight never ends.  I'm quit with all of you today....

Yeah man I felt this! The game is suck, the goal is winning, the Prize is your life! early on it hurts so good , my eyes hurt my skull was foggy and hurting, sleep was hard to come by. But like a drunken sailor i stumbled into roll Every morning praying and promising 24 hours to this brotherhood. And here i am almost a year in feeling soooo much better. i look back to where you are now and say thank god i pushed, thank god i committed to kicking this nasty ass shit to the curb. My body thanks me, my family is proud, and some people stand out in the cold in awe wishing they could be where even you are right now. 47 days is hard and alot of people cant hack a month. im excited for you to start feeling better and see what i see now. Some days still suck donkey D but they come in short burst and i no everyone here has my back.
Nick-269LTBE

[Keith0617]

Day 47 here, and I'm having cravings stronger than ever before, my addict mind dreams of a smoke or dip, all damn day.  It is my promise that I make every morning to my brothers that keeps me straight, but I will tell you, the fight never ends.  I'm quit with all of you today....

You should have my digits in the PM from GQG. Holler if you need to.

Happy to quit with you as well @Haas22. What I can tell you is it gets so much better and easier. Don’t get me wrong, we are always addicts and nicotine will always be put drug. That is why I know I will keep posting my promise daily and keep developing relationships with fellow quitters. There is nothing better than sharing a beverage will a fellow quitter. If you don’t, I recommend you communicate with will fellow quitters every now and then. It really gives my quit a kick in the pants. Reach out if I can help. Always looking to partner with fellow  quitters to fight this addiction.

[EdT3329]

Day 47 here, and I'm having cravings stronger than ever before, my addict mind dreams of a smoke or dip, all damn day.  It is my promise that I make every morning to my brothers that keeps me straight, but I will tell you, the fight never ends.  I'm quit with all of you today....

You should have my digits in the PM from GQG. Holler if you need to.

[Haas22]

Day 47 here, and I'm having cravings stronger than ever before, my addict mind dreams of a smoke or dip, all damn day.  It is my promise that I make every morning to my brothers that keeps me straight, but I will tell you, the fight never ends.  I'm quit with all of you today....

[Keith0617]

another journal entry,...
its funny to me, that there really is so little information on the internet regarding quitting smokeless tobacco.   As i work my way through day 9 of no nicotine after 20 years, i have physical sensations that i dont see anyone talk about online, except this forum.  I noticed today, i am having smells hit me out of the blue that i should not be smelling, often times maybe a burning smell of different varieties?  so weird as i usually would associate this with quitting smoking, but not chew.  Also having a fair share of muscle twitches lately...not painful, but annoying for sure lol.  As my anxiety level increases while my brain learns to have emotions without nicotine again, i become even more hyper aware of physical discomfort, which can definately snowball in my mind to the negative side.  I made an agreement with myself that I will not have a drink for the first 100 days of my quit, not because i have a problem with alcohol, but i know myself and if i drink i will have a much better chance of caving.  But man, a cold frothy one sure is nice to think about on this day 9.  I,m here quit with all of you today.

hold tight Brother! i had the muscles spasms as well, Alcohol is the number 1 excuses as to why someone is posting another day 1! its all a trick and you are on the right side of this thing my friend. keep fighting were all proud of you!

Nick- LTBE

Keep doing your thing and quitting ODAAT. Just remember, if you hit a bump in the road reach out to the fellow quitters you are building relationships with. We all need help at times. Proud to quit with you.

[nick-Otine Free]

another journal entry,...
its funny to me, that there really is so little information on the internet regarding quitting smokeless tobacco.   As i work my way through day 9 of no nicotine after 20 years, i have physical sensations that i dont see anyone talk about online, except this forum.  I noticed today, i am having smells hit me out of the blue that i should not be smelling, often times maybe a burning smell of different varieties?  so weird as i usually would associate this with quitting smoking, but not chew.  Also having a fair share of muscle twitches lately...not painful, but annoying for sure lol.  As my anxiety level increases while my brain learns to have emotions without nicotine again, i become even more hyper aware of physical discomfort, which can definately snowball in my mind to the negative side.  I made an agreement with myself that I will not have a drink for the first 100 days of my quit, not because i have a problem with alcohol, but i know myself and if i drink i will have a much better chance of caving.  But man, a cold frothy one sure is nice to think about on this day 9.  I,m here quit with all of you today.

hold tight Brother! i had the muscles spasms as well, Alcohol is the number 1 excuses as to why someone is posting another day 1! its all a trick and you are on the right side of this thing my friend. keep fighting were all proud of you!

Nick- LTBE 

[Haas22]

another journal entry,...
its funny to me, that there really is so little information on the internet regarding quitting smokeless tobacco.   As i work my way through day 9 of no nicotine after 20 years, i have physical sensations that i dont see anyone talk about online, except this forum.  I noticed today, i am having smells hit me out of the blue that i should not be smelling, often times maybe a burning smell of different varieties?  so weird as i usually would associate this with quitting smoking, but not chew.  Also having a fair share of muscle twitches lately...not painful, but annoying for sure lol.  As my anxiety level increases while my brain learns to have emotions without nicotine again, i become even more hyper aware of physical discomfort, which can definately snowball in my mind to the negative side.  I made an agreement with myself that I will not have a drink for the first 100 days of my quit, not because i have a problem with alcohol, but i know myself and if i drink i will have a much better chance of caving.  But man, a cold frothy one sure is nice to think about on this day 9.  I,m here quit with all of you today.

[bubblehed668]

Just a journal entry, Day 6 and I am extremely annoyed and aggravated.  God, grant me the strength to deal with stupid today.  I will not scream at or punch anything.  I will not use today.  Breathe with me quitters......1, 2, 3, 4, hold 1, 2, exhale 1, 2, 3, 4. 

There is an underlying vehemance in me today that scares me.  The Nic Bitch is pulling more arrows from her quiver....I will not stagger.

@Haas22
That is her way of showing how important you are. Don’t give in. Don’t let her win. Be proud of yourself  today. You are an addict and you are being your addiction today. Proud to quit with you today and I will be back to quit with you again tomorrow.

Thank you for your support, your words are my own ammunition in this fight today.

Shoot me a pm with digits. Happy to exchange to fight this battle together @Haas22

@Haas22 when you feel that underlying vehemence, be sure to bring it here. We know how to deal with while friends and family may not. Stay strong and stay true to your quit. The nic bitch plays dirty and you have to return in kind. KTC with your brother and sisters are the "in kind" that you return to her. Remember One minute, one hour, one day at a time. You got this.

[Keith0617]

Just a journal entry, Day 6 and I am extremely annoyed and aggravated.  God, grant me the strength to deal with stupid today.  I will not scream at or punch anything.  I will not use today.  Breathe with me quitters......1, 2, 3, 4, hold 1, 2, exhale 1, 2, 3, 4. 

There is an underlying vehemance in me today that scares me.  The Nic Bitch is pulling more arrows from her quiver....I will not stagger.

@Haas22
That is her way of showing how important you are. Don’t give in. Don’t let her win. Be proud of yourself  today. You are an addict and you are being your addiction today. Proud to quit with you today and I will be back to quit with you again tomorrow.

Thank you for your support, your words are my own ammunition in this fight today.

Shoot me a pm with digits. Happy to exchange to fight this battle together @Haas22   

[Haas22]

Just a journal entry, Day 6 and I am extremely annoyed and aggravated.  God, grant me the strength to deal with stupid today.  I will not scream at or punch anything.  I will not use today.  Breathe with me quitters......1, 2, 3, 4, hold 1, 2, exhale 1, 2, 3, 4. 

There is an underlying vehemance in me today that scares me.  The Nic Bitch is pulling more arrows from her quiver....I will not stagger.

@Haas22
That is her way of showing how important you are. Don’t give in. Don’t let her win. Be proud of yourself  today. You are an addict and you are being your addiction today. Proud to quit with you today and I will be back to quit with you again tomorrow.

Thank you for your support, your words are my own ammunition in this fight today. 

[Keith0617]

Just a journal entry, Day 6 and I am extremely annoyed and aggravated.  God, grant me the strength to deal with stupid today.  I will not scream at or punch anything.  I will not use today.  Breathe with me quitters......1, 2, 3, 4, hold 1, 2, exhale 1, 2, 3, 4. 

There is an underlying vehemance in me today that scares me.  The Nic Bitch is pulling more arrows from her quiver....I will not stagger.

@Haas22
That is her way of showing how important you are. Don’t give in. Don’t let her win. Be proud of yourself  today. You are an addict and you are being your addiction today. Proud to quit with you today and I will be back to quit with you again tomorrow.

[Haas22]

Just a journal entry, Day 6 and I am extremely annoyed and aggravated.  God, grant me the strength to deal with stupid today.  I will not scream at or punch anything.  I will not use today.  Breathe with me quitters......1, 2, 3, 4, hold 1, 2, exhale 1, 2, 3, 4. 

There is an underlying vehemance in me today that scares me.  The Nic Bitch is pulling more arrows from her quiver....I will not stagger.

[Phxshadow]

I wanted to make this post regarding my day 4 to give comfort to others that may experience the same things and for me to read later when I get a crave.

I briefly explained what has brought me here after caving in 2018 after 120 days.  Starting in June, I started having terrible panic attacks.  Full blown meltdown in public, rush to the ER panic attacks.  Out of nowhere, or so I thought.  Basically I would get vertigo, and think I was dying, heart palpatations etc.  Once at the ER I would be ok, EKG was good, etc.  I just turned 44.  It is important to understand that I was extremely social, active, and healthy.  This quickly changed after the panic attacks, I am afraid and high anxiety all of the time.  Fearing another attack will happen at any moment, and they do, sometimes 10 in a day.  I went to the doctors, first one said TMJ and anxiety disorder. This confused me because I had never experienced anything like these mental challenges, how does this happen out of the blue? I thought.  Turns out I have an issue in my labyrinth in my ears...partly because of chewing for 20 years.
      So, for 9 weeks, I have been in hell, had an allergic reaction to the steroid prednisone, had terrible reactions to some mental meds including crazy shit like intrusive and suicidal thoughts, etc.
    The whole time, I'm still chewing lmao.  Finally I started researching, and the links between nicotine and anxiety and panic are staggering.  I threw away my stash on Sat night and logged into KTC.
   So yesterday(day 4) I experienced all of these symptoms:
Nausea, flu-like, ear pain, jaw pain(excruciating), body aches, and massive headaches.  It got to a point while I was driving, that I thought I was having a stroke, could barely keep my head up, it scared the shit out of me.  But I also had fleeting intrusive thoughts, crazy town shit.  I had to breathe and work through it, getting home and forcing myself to lay down.  I will tell you, it was top 5 most agonizing 3 hour periods in my life.

I had over 20 texts from fellow quitters, checking on me, encouraging me etc, and I can tell you without a doubt they helped save my quit yesterday when I was in so much agony and the thought of a dip making it all go away crossed my mind.

Day 5 today, posted roll, I will keep my promise today. I quit with all of you today.

you are the Hero of your Story brother! Keep fighting it Every Damn Day! It wants you to loose, It wants you to cave, It calls you because it thinks your weak! Your Not ! your the champs champ look how far you already came and what you endured. The climb up the mountain is always hell but the view at the top takes your breath away and makes it all worth it. I quit with you

Nick- LTBE

Hang in there Brother. Your story sounds very much like mine. It can be terrifying but worth it to be rid of the can. This to will pass. I quit with you

[nick-Otine Free]

I wanted to make this post regarding my day 4 to give comfort to others that may experience the same things and for me to read later when I get a crave.

I briefly explained what has brought me here after caving in 2018 after 120 days.  Starting in June, I started having terrible panic attacks.  Full blown meltdown in public, rush to the ER panic attacks.  Out of nowhere, or so I thought.  Basically I would get vertigo, and think I was dying, heart palpatations etc.  Once at the ER I would be ok, EKG was good, etc.  I just turned 44.  It is important to understand that I was extremely social, active, and healthy.  This quickly changed after the panic attacks, I am afraid and high anxiety all of the time.  Fearing another attack will happen at any moment, and they do, sometimes 10 in a day.  I went to the doctors, first one said TMJ and anxiety disorder. This confused me because I had never experienced anything like these mental challenges, how does this happen out of the blue? I thought.  Turns out I have an issue in my labyrinth in my ears...partly because of chewing for 20 years.
      So, for 9 weeks, I have been in hell, had an allergic reaction to the steroid prednisone, had terrible reactions to some mental meds including crazy shit like intrusive and suicidal thoughts, etc.
    The whole time, I'm still chewing lmao.  Finally I started researching, and the links between nicotine and anxiety and panic are staggering.  I threw away my stash on Sat night and logged into KTC.
   So yesterday(day 4) I experienced all of these symptoms:
Nausea, flu-like, ear pain, jaw pain(excruciating), body aches, and massive headaches.  It got to a point while I was driving, that I thought I was having a stroke, could barely keep my head up, it scared the shit out of me.  But I also had fleeting intrusive thoughts, crazy town shit.  I had to breathe and work through it, getting home and forcing myself to lay down.  I will tell you, it was top 5 most agonizing 3 hour periods in my life.

I had over 20 texts from fellow quitters, checking on me, encouraging me etc, and I can tell you without a doubt they helped save my quit yesterday when I was in so much agony and the thought of a dip making it all go away crossed my mind.

Day 5 today, posted roll, I will keep my promise today. I quit with all of you today.

you are the Hero of your Story brother! Keep fighting it Every Damn Day! It wants you to loose, It wants you to cave, It calls you because it thinks your weak! Your Not ! your the champs champ look how far you already came and what you endured. The climb up the mountain is always hell but the view at the top takes your breath away and makes it all worth it. I quit with you

Nick- LTBE

[Zombo Funk]

I wanted to make this post regarding my day 4 to give comfort to others that may experience the same things and for me to read later when I get a crave.

I briefly explained what has brought me here after caving in 2018 after 120 days.  Starting in June, I started having terrible panic attacks.  Full blown meltdown in public, rush to the ER panic attacks.  Out of nowhere, or so I thought.  Basically I would get vertigo, and think I was dying, heart palpatations etc.  Once at the ER I would be ok, EKG was good, etc.  I just turned 44.  It is important to understand that I was extremely social, active, and healthy.  This quickly changed after the panic attacks, I am afraid and high anxiety all of the time.  Fearing another attack will happen at any moment, and they do, sometimes 10 in a day.  I went to the doctors, first one said TMJ and anxiety disorder. This confused me because I had never experienced anything like these mental challenges, how does this happen out of the blue? I thought.  Turns out I have an issue in my labyrinth in my ears...partly because of chewing for 20 years.
      So, for 9 weeks, I have been in hell, had an allergic reaction to the steroid prednisone, had terrible reactions to some mental meds including crazy shit like intrusive and suicidal thoughts, etc.
    The whole time, I'm still chewing lmao.  Finally I started researching, and the links between nicotine and anxiety and panic are staggering.  I threw away my stash on Sat night and logged into KTC.
   So yesterday(day 4) I experienced all of these symptoms:
Nausea, flu-like, ear pain, jaw pain(excruciating), body aches, and massive headaches.  It got to a point while I was driving, that I thought I was having a stroke, could barely keep my head up, it scared the shit out of me.  But I also had fleeting intrusive thoughts, crazy town shit.  I had to breathe and work through it, getting home and forcing myself to lay down.  I will tell you, it was top 5 most agonizing 3 hour periods in my life.

I had over 20 texts from fellow quitters, checking on me, encouraging me etc, and I can tell you without a doubt they helped save my quit yesterday when I was in so much agony and the thought of a dip making it all go away crossed my mind.

Day 5 today, posted roll, I will keep my promise today. I quit with all of you today.

Yeah night 2 and night 3 were awful for me. Short of breath, palpitations, waking up feeling like I was suffocating, then these dreamlike thoughts that just brought feelings of indefinite dread. Thankfully every night since has been an improvement and we’re getting healthier everyday. Glad to be quitting with you today

emoney

Man I really appreciate you sharing all of this. I'm sorry you're going through it but it will get better. Damn proud to be quit with you today.