Starting my 33rd year

[Doc Chewfree]

a little fact my dad (quit smoking 7 years ago) always says: The urge is going to go away whether your body gets nicotine or not.  Very wise words.

Wise in deed, MPR.
Glad to quit with you.
QLF!

That Mizzou Tiger looked so good on your thread, I had to do it again.
:D

Point of fact: Although I was raised as a Buckeye and I bleed scarlet and grey, I did in fact graduate from Mizzou's CVM. Class of 2009! Dual allegiances are allowed, right?

You Bet Bro.

[MPR81]

a little fact my dad (quit smoking 7 years ago) always says: The urge is going to go away whether your body gets nicotine or not.  Very wise words.

Wise in deed, MPR.
Glad to quit with you.
QLF!

That Mizzou Tiger looked so good on your thread, I had to do it again.
:D

Point of fact: Although I was raised as a Buckeye and I bleed scarlet and grey, I did in fact graduate from Mizzou's CVM. Class of 2009! Dual allegiances are allowed, right?

[Doc Chewfree]

a little fact my dad (quit smoking 7 years ago) always says: The urge is going to go away whether your body gets nicotine or not.  Very wise words.

Wise in deed, MPR.
Glad to quit with you.
QLF!

That Mizzou Tiger looked so good on your thread, I had to do it again.
:D

[Doc Chewfree]

a little fact my dad (quit smoking 7 years ago) always says: The urge is going to go away whether your body gets nicotine or not. Very wise words.

Wise in deed, MPR.
Glad to quit with you.
QLF!

[MPR81]

As I come across awesome words of wisdom, I'm going to copy them here so I can re-read them. Great words here, courtesy of Skoal Monster and Ron_Cross

I learn so much for these caves!  The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people. 

1.  Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.

2.  One problem + nicotine = two problems.

3.  Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.

4.  Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.

5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.  


6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself


7. There is no just one.....ever


8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie


9. you will always be an addict


10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully


11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't


And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner.  It's so simple.  Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that your going to suffer for awhile.  It won't kill you despite what you think.  A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think?  What about you?

[jayd41]

...now let's talk about Dayton and how OSU screwed me out of a Billion $.

I'm sure I'm not the BIGGEST Buckeyes fan in the world, but I'm pretty fanatical. So, here comes March Madness, and lo and behold I have two days off for the first two days of the tourney! I'm sitting in a sports bar with a good friend of mine, enjoying the game, forgetting how much quitting sucks for a short period of time. Do you know how much harder the quit gets when you are inside the first week and your team loses in the first round to fucking DAYTON? But I made it, and now, as far as I'm concerned, it's officially college football season.

Yeah try being a purdue/cubs fan...Purdue was last in both football and basketball this year in the Big ten...our baseball team is god awful...but hey we do have a helluva diving squad i hear...and the cubs...well they're the cubs...the only solace i have is that IU didn't make it in to anything and your buckeyes got beat by FUCKIN DAYTON!!!! HAHAHA...life is good...oh yeah quit on!

[MPR81]

...now let's talk about Dayton and how OSU screwed me out of a Billion $.

I'm sure I'm not the BIGGEST Buckeyes fan in the world, but I'm pretty fanatical. So, here comes March Madness, and lo and behold I have two days off for the first two days of the tourney! I'm sitting in a sports bar with a good friend of mine, enjoying the game, forgetting how much quitting sucks for a short period of time. Do you know how much harder the quit gets when you are inside the first week and your team loses in the first round to fucking DAYTON? But I made it, and now, as far as I'm concerned, it's officially college football season.

[dunwit]

Well slug, you have clearly learned from your past and by sharing with us we have as well. Agreed stories like this are, although bad for you, good for us to hear. Thanks for your honesty and for fucks sake do it right this time!! Hell yea I will quit with ya!

[slug.go]

Thanks to everyone posting on here. I appreciate the support and I really appreciate the accountability. This site would mean nothing if it was all sunshine and roses any time some jackass decided to quit for a week. That is not me.

I let myself believe that I could become a non-addict. I now know that was a lie. I will never stop being an addict. The moment I let my guard down, that bitch will sneak in.

I woke up about an hour ago, on Day 5. Thank God the fog seems to be a little less today. It's still there though. I'm headed to work right now. I would normally have a fatty in my lip at this point in my day. That thought pops into my head about every 3 seconds, but I'm relearning a little fact my dad (quit smoking 7 years ago) always says: The urge is going to go away whether your body gets nicotine or not. Very wise words.

Wise words indeed...now let's talk about Dayton and how OSU screwed me out of a Billion $.

[MPR81]

Thanks to everyone posting on here. I appreciate the support and I really appreciate the accountability. This site would mean nothing if it was all sunshine and roses any time some jackass decided to quit for a week. That is not me.

I let myself believe that I could become a non-addict. I now know that was a lie. I will never stop being an addict. The moment I let my guard down, that bitch will sneak in.

I woke up about an hour ago, on Day 5. Thank God the fog seems to be a little less today. It's still there though. I'm headed to work right now. I would normally have a fatty in my lip at this point in my day. That thought pops into my head about every 3 seconds, but I'm relearning a little fact my dad (quit smoking 7 years ago) always says: The urge is going to go away whether your body gets nicotine or not. Very wise words.

[srans]

Welcome back. I came a little after you, and actually am a good friend to a couple in your group. I'm on day 400 which mean you would probably be around 450 or so. You wouldn't believe the difference in 150 and 400.

One thing caught my attention:

[/QUOTE]Plus, cigars barely have any nicotine in them anyway!

This ^^^ statement right here demonstrates part of your failure. This tells me you did very little reading on your addiction/nicotine. One cigar can contain as much nicotine as one pack of cigarettes. The nicotine enters through your saliva glands, just as chew does. As you have now found out one cigar can and will kill a quit quick.

Part of our addiction is believing we can control it. Get this in your head! You can't control this addiction. One is to many and 1000 will never be enough. This includes a CIGAR or anything else that contains the posion.

I recommend you read this time. Learn your addiction/nicotine. Learn your enemy it knows you. Need another number let me know.

[Grizzlyhasclaws]

Wow, powerful story, thank you very much for sharing. You just kicked my quit (and awareness) up a notch. Very good reminder of why we addicts need to remind ourselves EVERY DAMN DAY by posting roll.

Stay quit this time brother. Keep posting roll.

[ERDVM]

Glad you're back doc. Real punch in the dick though. Reminds me of that one nurse or receptionist that you always make excuses for. You overlook certain shortcomings like chronic tardiness, lateness, mistakes etc. You just want to grab them and shake some sense in them, and scream

WHY DO YOU NOT REALIZE THE POTENTIAL FOR A GREAT THING HERE? DONT YOU SEE THAT I WANT YOU TO SUCCEED AND WILL HELP YOU? IF YOU JUST CARED A LITTLE MORE? IF YOU JUST PUT OUT A LITTLE MORE EFFORT!"

You know the same employee. The problem is that I am trying to project my personality on my employees. It never works though. It doesn't work when the employer cares more about the employee's job than the employee.

Doc, YOU need to CARE this time. YOU need to figure out what YOU are willing to DO to stay QUIT.

I have no idea what you are going through right now. I am ashamed and embarrassed for you. I cherish my quit. I stare down my addictive behavior every day. I still contact multiple quitters daily. When I'm funky (which I am right now), I reach out. I used to think that made me weak, but it takes balls to reach out. To tell a peer that you're hurting, or funky, or tempted, or just plain depressed....but, there I go again with my anthromorphoquittism again. Fuck, I hate that Bitch. She doesn't get to share my life with me anymore. Not Today. Fuck Her.

It is good to see you back. I and some others noticed your day 1. You need to post your cave explanation in June. They deserve it. You also need to post your plan. They need that too.

Vadge 799

[Wt57]

Welcome back but one more question; what are you going to different? I honestly don't understand the feeling that a person thinks they are in the clear. At 720 days I'm still very much aware that my quit is vulnerable. Two years ago I never dreamt that I'd be posting roll still. The more of this type of cave I see strengthens my resolve to return to post roll. I remember the suck not only of quitting but I remember the suck of slavery and for me the suck of being a liar was worse.

[MPR81]

Thank you for the support, Sage. I'm quitting with you today.

I was just doing some research, and found the last day I posted in April 2013.

MPR81 - Day 149 - Sorry, I missed a few days during the Memorial Day weekend. Still here.

I want that to be here to help me remember when I slipped away last time. I also ran across a fantastic quote from LOOT:

St. LooT, Chapter 1, verse 21, Fightin the funk

Some of you are out of the funk. Some are entering. Some are in the low-down, dirty fuckin middle of the battle.

Word of advice....REMEMBER. Remember what it feels like. Remember how low and desperate you feel, how it takes every fiber of your core to stay clean for a single day. Remember, how on those days posting roll is the most liberating yet confining thing you do in a day.

This is the first of many funks you'll go through. Each funk will be separated by the passing of more time. Each generally less intense than those before. In time, it will subside completely.

The first 100 days are critical in the quitting process. By 100 you should have developed some healthy habits to replace the negative. Hopefully, you've tackled the oral fixation and are well on your way to conquering it. This was a very difficult thing for LOOT to grasp. If you have not addressed your oral fixation, you need to think about a strategy to handle it. It may go away on it's own, it may need a nudge....but you WILL address it.

Anyway, back to the funk. These are the times when your quit is the most vulnerable. Protect it at all costs. Most funks happen around Days 80, 125, 250, 400, 700. That's pretty close to LOOT's schedule. It has been over 1200 days since LOOTs last event. Mule told LOOT he had a funk close to 1000.

1200 days of simply posting roll and commiserating with newbs is a great place to be. Think about it.

This post is not meant to discourage. You've been told to worry about TODAY only. That is beautiful advice. However, forgetting yesterday is a recipe for death. LOOT just wants to put a few things on your radar. You should know there are bumps in the road without being told. Forewarned is foreskined. Be steady. Stay the course. There are so many beautiful days ahead of you. Keep your nose down and trudge through the hard times. They will galvanize your quit.

Remember these times. Remember where you've been.

Never again, for any reason.