I apologize for the long post if such things are frowned upon, but I want/have to quit and am looking for some advice as well as needing to explain this part of my life to someone.....
When I was 17 my friends got a hold of a can of skoal somehow. One Sunday while playing pool the can was produced and offered to everyone. I passed, mainly because I had a date that night and there was no way I was going to risk not, well, (I'm sure everyone can remember their 17 year old hormones....) But my friends, they had a blast, and I figured the next time the can came out I would try it. The can never came back, my friends were more interested in smoking cigars. So one night with nothing else to do I stopped at a convenience store determined to try a can. The only type of dip that I could remember was Kodiak, and while I was technically not allowed to buy tobacco at 17, it was a different time and store clerks were required to ask for a birthday but not an ID.
Over the next 22 years that bear (damned or beloved depending on my mood and/or cravings) weaseled it's way into my life. At 1st it was Saturday night, then it was Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday night. Then it was whenever I was by myself. There was a trucker that came into my work who always wore overalls; eventually he told me that he couldn't wear belts because when he was a boy he'd been taught the "correct" way to dip with a little pinch way in the back of your mouth so no one could see it while swallowing the juice and eventually he developed stomach issues. My logic was 'why didn't I think of that before?' After that I was almost never without Kodiak.
There was one serious attempt at quitting right before I got married. I cut back to the point where I had one dip at 9:30 every evening for an hour. I seriously wish I had been able to cut that out as well. I became a ninja dipper, with a small pinch in my check and a can in my sock I could go anywhere and do anything (I thought.) My wife obviously knows that I dip but she doesn't know how much or often, and my closest friends and co-workers do not know that I dip.
A few weeks ago with terrible tooth pain I went to the dentist. He told me what I already suspected, I needed a tooth extracted. After the procedure I was given a pamphlet that said I should not use any tobacco for 72 hours. I thought 'is this it? Am I really going to quit?' It was hell. I couldn't sit still. I was pacing back and forth in my office, I couldn't think. Finally I looked at the clock It had been 3 1/2 hours since my last dip on the way to the dentist office. I had to... I grabbed the can from my sock and took the smallest of pinches I left it in for 15 minutes determined that I would wait another 3 hours before giving in again. I knew I had to quit if I couldn't go an hour without my body needing a fix. I focused on cutting back going longer and longer between dips.
I have to go back to the dentist this week for him to insert a calcified bone fragment so my jaw will grow bone where the tooth was so that a pin and prosthetic tooth can be inserted. Last week I had to go in to get prescriptions and instructions. He told me everything he was going to do, and what might go wrong including what would happen if I smoked. Then he asked the dreaded question, "Do you use any other type of tobacco?"
When I told him I did he gave me the standard Dr. speech. Then he told me about working on other guys who used chewing tobacco and what had happened to them. He finished with "I've seen it too many times, if you chew after this the procedure will not work and you WILL wear dentures for the rest of your life. Thing is, He is a retired Navy dentist/oral surgeon who spent most of his career on a aircraft carrier. I have enough friends who spent time on navy ships to know how many guys dip on ships.
Props to him, he went over how I could deal with craving and helped me set up a plan to quit or at least get through the two weeks that I can't dip for this procedure. Part of that plan was me starting the patch today, which I did and it's been almost 13 hours since I had a dip... which two weeks ago would have put me through a wall.
Yesterday I was outside working in the yard. My wife was going to her cousins bridal shower and stopped to give me a good bye kiss. Usually in situations like that I offer some lame excuse 'I'm all sweaty' and give her a quick peck on the cheek because I had my ninja dip in my mouth and didn't want her to find out. Yesterday however, after realizing that I didn't have a dip in and it had been a really long time since I did, I turned around and gave her a full on long lingering kiss on the lips. She didn't expect that but her smile and the look she gave me... Now I really really want to quit.
Today I found this site which seems to suggest that cold turkey is the only/best way to go.So from one hopefully future quitter to many quitters what do I do? quit cold turkey, follow my Dr.'s advice and use the patch, or just use the patch for as long as he prescribed and then go cold turkey?
Thanks for reading
Brad
