Day 277 - 4/17/14
Newbs and others take notice...when I was on week one and two and kept hearing from the veterans on here "it gets better" I just wanted to tell them to fuck off because it sucks right now, I could give a fuck about it getting better, I wanted it better right now. I am not from the Now generation and I have never asked for anyone to give me something nor have I ever felt entitled to something, but early in my quit I just wanted all the bullshit to stop.
The constant cravings, the little voices telling me one little pinch won't hurt, the rage (OMFG the Rage), the mood swings, the change in dietary needs, posting roll... All of it was too much, at times.
However, everyone was consistent, the message was clear, the people were real, the stories hit home. The path was defined. SO I stuck with it and ever since about 240 something it has been easier. Granted the recent forum changes were not easy but no IT changes are; however, this recent changed reminded me of when I was a newb fucking up roll, bumping people lie crazy and not giving a damn because my head was so far in the fog (AKA up nicotine's ass) that I could see the real journey.
Tonight I have a chance to expand my quit network in real life again, meeting up with a over two year quitter, a -100 day brother, a seasoned yet pre-HOF quitter, and if they can make it some even more long term quitters. All of this shows me that it doesn't matter if you are on day 1, 10, 100, 1,000, 10,000; we all quit the same way daily, we are all one bad decision away from another day 1. We all share the same stories, we all are addicts.
Now insert Ferris Bueller voice "If you have the means to meet another quitter I highly recommend picking one out, they are so choice"
Ferris Bueller - So ChoiceCarry on!
P