Sorry but another long one to get some things out of my head and heart.....
Well heading back the drawing board. No not a cave, but leaning on what I have been taught in life and then trying to apply it as I move forward. For those that know me, know that I do analyze situations, and sometimes overanalyze them. Well I guess when one goes through tough times they fall back on the things from life that they have learned and can relate to. For this I fall back on the course I took as a boy scout leader, the Woodbadge Training. Now this is training for the adult leaders shaped around the properties of leadership, team building and conflict resolution. They had us watch the movie Remember the Titans to show us the development that needs to occur between people to work as one, in one common cause. In particular two scenes really stand out in my mind recently:
The first is the scene of the 2 captains during the training camp
Bertier: Listen, I'm Gerry, you're Julius. Let's just get some particulars and get this over with.
Julius: Particulars? Man, no matter what I tell you, you ain't never gonna know nothing about me.
Bertier: Listen, I ain't running any more of these three-a-days
Julius: Well, what I've got to say, you really don't wanna hear 'cuz honesty ain't too high upon your people's priorities.
Bertier: Honesty? You want honesty? Honestly, I think you're nothing. Nothing but a pure waste of God-given talent. You don't listen to nobody, man! Not even Doc or Boone! Shiver push on the line everytime and you blow right past 'em! Push 'em, pull 'em, do something! You run over everyone in this league, and everytime you do you leave one of your teammates hanging out to dry, me in particular!
Julius: Why should I give a hoot about you, huh? Or anyone else out there? You wanna talk about the ways you're the captain?
Bertier: Right.
Julius: You got a job?
Bertier: I've got a job.
Julius: You been doing your job?
Bertier: I've been doing my job.
Julius: Then why don't you tell your white buddies to block for Rev better? Because they have not blocked for him worth a blood nickel, and you know it! Nobody plays. Yourself included. I'm supposed to wear myself out for the team? What team? Nah, nah what I'm gonna do is look out for myself and I'ma get mine.
Bertier: See man, that's the worst attitude I ever heard.
Julius: Attitude reflects leadership, captain.
The second is when Julius sees Bertier in the hospital after the car accident:
Bertier: Well, you think I look banged up, you should see my Camaro.
Julius: Man, I sure am sorry, man. I should have been there with you.
Bertier: What are you talking about? You would've been in that bed right next to me.
Julius: You can't be hurt like this. You - you're Superman.
Bertier: I was afraid of you, Julius. I only saw what I was afraid of, and now I know I was only hating my brother.
Julius: I'll tell you what, though. Um, when all this is over... me and you are gonna move out to the same neighborhood together. OK? And, um... and we'll get old, and we'll get fat. And there ain't gonna be all this black-white between us.
Bertier: [Chuckles] Left side.
Julius: Strong side.
I guess I am seeing a struggle going on, where logically there should not be one. I see the benefit to helping others as this is a fight against our addiction to nicotine in all forms. I am a part of the overall league to do just that and that the teams are there for that continuous fight. But remember that in our fight we have to be perfect in daily against this poison or we will lose. And perfect for 788 days I have been so far. And when I wake tomorrow I will follow my game plan to make it another perfect day.
