Garbage feeling

[Thefranks5]

Well time to talk again. Never in my life did I ever think that this addiction would bring me down so bad. I am 127 days in and totally exhausted, mentally and physically. I always look for the silver lining in situations and this one is there but so far out of reach yet. So my throat is better to a point as the level of discomfort comes and goes. Sometimes all I feel is like something is stuck and sometimes everything feels like its burning which bothers my speech. That usually includes my throat, my sinus, my tongue, my mouth all with a slight bitter taste. With these issues it really fires the anxiety and depression plus I drive a lot for my job so there is no way to keep your mind off it. Today I woke up with what feels like a dry mouth issue with weird feeling tongue and back of mouth. At least thats what it feels like and its all classic signs of silent reflux. The ent doctor did not provide anything other then a prescription which is disappointing. So after researching the cure is to lower the acid level in your stomach and maintain it with diet. So if you are diagnosed with this be prepared to stop eating 3/4 of what your used to. I have also read that even after you controlled it per say you will have issues for 2-6 weeks until you heal. So we need to be looking down the road before that can be somewhat better. In the mean time I understand what it can cause your brain to do but remember, did you have these issues before when you constantly was washing yourself with tobacco juice? I didn’t, so we need to stay the course going forward to get thru all the new issues without caving. Caving is not going to fix your issues its just going to make it worse by covering it up. I looked at the older posts to see if I could figure out when this started. I saw 6 weeks in one and 50 days in another so for the last 75 days or so (over 2 months) I have had this issue. When will it stop? I hope as soon as I can get my diet and what I can eat straightened out and stay on it then it can start the repair the damage but the reflux needs to stop first. So anybody out there that has these symptoms look it up and research it and get the proper diet going. This is not going to bring me down and lead me the wrong way. I have come to far to fail and throw it all away. As an exdipper we just want to feel like we did when we dipped. Well for me it will take a while as it has for others. Even though I have a quit date of 3/5 I actually started to wean myself on 2/6. So I have been fighting this battle for 156 days if my math is correct. I can feel the new normal and it is better than the old normal with nicotine. Boy the party it will be when I get all this reflux crap under control though.  This is your quit and YES its personal. You are permanently divorcing yourself from nicotine and I truly believe that its a tool of satan and if you know how he works he will never let go. It will always be there the nagging, the buy me you need me, you can’t live without me and its ok I am what you need. Its been a long uphill battle that will eventually get easier. So stay strong, stay safe and God bless.
P.S. sorry if it seemed I rambled. Its my state of mind, lol.

Promises kept
8/8/98
3/5/20

[Thefranks5]

Update time. Today 7/2 is one week after going to ent doctor for an 8 week throat issue. I have improved dramatically and now I am able to try and find food and drink that trigger it so they can be eliminated. I put a lengthy post on the site under acid reflux so people have additional knowledge. I would say I am 1000% better between physical and mental symptoms that had affected me. My biggest issue today (120 days) is the crave and oral fixation. Packing your lip for 30 years does not go away any time soon I guess. So its the juggle deal as to what can cure the crave and oral but not trigger reflux. Most fakes have something in it to cause the burn chewers desired. As a long cut guy smokey mountain is my go to but every product has cayenne pepper which really fires my reflux. But I really like the baccoff apple pouches but for the life of me there is something in it that burns to but no clue per ingredients. But we are doing much much much better but man 4 months of feeling like absolute garbage takes it toll on a man. So I am proud to say that I have been nicotine free for 120 days and I will continue that count forever. PTQWYT, NAFAR and ODAAT is the way to be for me. Stay strong, stay safe and may God bless everybody.

[EXBEARHAG]

As my mom would say after a good report- Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord. Had my ent doc visit this morning and he stated my mouth is healing really really well. Confirmed I have sleep apnea throat and mouth but I new that. Scoped my throat and stated I have LPR reflux. Got my prilosec started this morning and scheduled follow up for six weeks. Doc said everything really looked great for abusing myself for 30 years. So now I have a renewed strength to fight this nic demon on even more so now. I want personally everybody who commented, quoted, suggested or yelled at me as every bit helped and I appreciated every bit of it. I am totally terrible with names so it will be very difficult to remember all of you but I pray for all us for strength, guidance and blessings going forward. This is definitely a battle that we will win, ODAAT, IQWYT and NO NICOTINE FOREVER. God bless everybody!!

  

Great news brother.  Keep kicking ass and doing your thing.  Love seeing you guiding younger quitters...will strengthen your own quit more than you know.  Keep it up!

[Thefranks5]

As my mom would say after a good report- Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord. Had my ent doc visit this morning and he stated my mouth is healing really really well. Confirmed I have sleep apnea throat and mouth but I new that. Scoped my throat and stated I have LPR reflux. Got my prilosec started this morning and scheduled follow up for six weeks. Doc said everything really looked great for abusing myself for 30 years. So now I have a renewed strength to fight this nic demon on even more so now. I want personally everybody who commented, quoted, suggested or yelled at me as every bit helped and I appreciated every bit of it. I am totally terrible with names so it will be very difficult to remember all of you but I pray for all us for strength, guidance and blessings going forward. This is definitely a battle that we will win, ODAAT, IQWYT and NO NICOTINE FOREVER. God bless everybody!!

[mtrentin]

Thefrank5, I recently went to a ENT doc after having similar symptoms and he scoped me and found no problems.  He told me it was likely acid reflux.  Let me know how your visit goes, if you want.  Good luck!

[Thefranks5]

Thanks EXBEARHAG, I was just talking to my wife when I got home that physically I feel about maybe 80%. My throat is a constant issue which went from superbad at about 50 day mark to a constant soreness now but affects my voice. I definitely know that when I get a trigger like today that I posted about it just makes my throat even worse. Then all heck breaks loose but I know the trigger and I can just ride it out but it also wears me out. Today it happened twice and one lasted an hour an half and would have loved a nap afterwards, lol. I told my wife that I can’t recall having any pains when I chewed other then the days I would over do it. The only thing I remember is when jonesing real bad my tongue would feel weird then my mouth and throat would get really dry and no drink would fix it. But if I popped a chew it all would go away and those symptoms did happen for about two weeks when my throat started to really fire up. I guess I am just worried as for tomorrows ent visit just because of 30 years of abuse. I am praying that they find no issues and its all withdrawal related, then I for will be fighting the nic bitch with a new amount of strength. Thanks for your digits and I will store them in my phone so you might hear from me. I tend to type long stories to but if I can help at least one other person then I am getting something done for the good of the world. Thanks again for everybody supporting each other as this fight should not be done alone. Stay strong, stay safe and God bless. 

[EXBEARHAG]

Hey @Thefranks5

I never really had major mouth or throat pain so I'm afraid I can't give you much advise on that front.  I believe Smokey Mt responded earlier.  I remember that he had some of those issues.

Anxiety, on the other hand, I can relate to.  Like you I never had anxiety or depression but I watched my wife suffer from time to time.  N ow I know what it means to be anxious.  At 345 days I'm still getting attacks on the mornings I have to work; these attacks, however, are less debilitating than they used to be and seem to be wavering a bit...just a bit but it's something.

I can also relate to feeling like shit for hours...days at a time.  My whole world revolved around nicotine (like many here) and I did not hide my addiction so I did it ALL the time.  For the first ~300 days, I felt a major void in my life and was reminded about my addiction by everything I did.  This made my life practically unbearable for the first 100 days but has gotten incrementally better since. 

Bottom line: the more space and time you put between you and nicotine, the easier this is going to get for you.  It may be almost unnoticeable day to day but as you stack those days things will get easier.  A couple vets have said it below: ODAAT.  This concept was the most important factor in getting me through all those tough days.  Do not allow yourself to think about tomorrow, next week, next year, etc.  If you are scheduled to go to the dentist today, go and make the best of it.  Come what may.  Try not to obsess about things until you have to.  Exercise, sleep, do anything that will keep your mind off of it until you can close your eyes for the night.  WUPP and repeat.  Not easy but simple. 

Lastly, make connections.  As tough as things are, life will probably get tougher (if even for a short period of time) at some point.  You WILL have that Fuck It Crave...eventually.  I've had several of these...even found myself sitting in the C-store lot a couple times in a mental world war with myself.  However, I make my promise early every day and have ~15 KTC contacts in my phone just waiting for when I falter.  I simple SOS text to anyone of them and I know I'll get the advise that I need.  Prior to this quit I did not have this safety net and I failed every time...usually within 3 weeks.  This is what makes KTC different.

Sorry for the diatribe.   I had many thoughts reading through your intro and I think I only made it through a couple of them.  Keep blogging this out here in intros and in your group.  Writing about these things and getting feedback is more valuable to me and my quit than I could describe. 

My digits are in your box.

Holding that line with you my brother, shoulder to shoulder.

~HAG

[Thefranks5]

Just venting so be nice, lol. I can take it yell at me. This anxiety sucks which makes every little pain 1000 times worse. My wife suffers from anxiety issues so I have somebody at home who can relate and now I can relate to her. I am an alarm tech so when I closed a call before I always thru a fatty in for the ride to the next one. Man now some of these attacks seem to go on for hours which has been since I stopped using 112 days ago. This one is going on hour and half now to which my wife can’t relate as hers only last minutes. Now that I recognize the symptoms I can try different ways to get thru them. They don't always work but the best is a fake fatty of baccoff or smokey mountain. Which will also meed to go away as per my wife. So here is a little more info on anxiety for everybody that still suffers from it. Counting the days for anxiety goes away as that makes the throat worse but we are in for the long haul. ODAAT, WUPP and IQWYT. Thank you everybody for the help this far and now I feel compelled to help the newbies. Be strong, be safe and God bless everybody.

[Keith0617]

Ok, I going to fuss again as I feel like a big wuss. 111 days in and still fighting a throat that goes from feeling like something is caught to it feeling like its on fire. Today is 6/23 and I go to the ent doc on 6/25 so at least I am going. The throat issue comes and goes but it seems never goes away. It went from full on assault (pain like burning, adams apple sore, pain to talk to feeling like muscles are super tense) to almost nothing. Then to go a half on assault with new sinus pains in rear of nostrils that feels like a cold coming on.  I started using flonase to help with allergies which it has, watch my diet and limit caffeine. I know I sound like a wuss but this old man is getting worn out with this stuff. I would be lying if I told you I am not scared to go to the doctor but why was I not scared when I chewed. Why was I not scared to go to the dentist but I am now? Why was I not scared when we I saw the cancer pics? Why was I not scared when my wifes coworkers husband was diagnosed with cancer and had a good amount of his jaw removed. Why was I not scared then but am now? The biggest thing that I would like is to be free of nicotine forever and only going odaat is the way. In the mean time I look to vets for help as they have all been thru this. I pray that all the newbies will find this post and have it help them also. This nasty addiction will not hold me back from reaching more and more days. I quit with you today and I will continue to post roll as long as my fingers and God lets me. God bless all of you and whatever info I receive I will be forever grateful for, thank you.

I faced and a number of other quitters I know faced issues with acid reflux for a while. The doc will take care of you. Try to relax, focus on what you can control, and stay busy. Self diagnosing rarely goes well. Reach out if I can help or you need someone to talk to.

[Thefranks5]

Ok, I going to fuss again as I feel like a big wuss. 111 days in and still fighting a throat that goes from feeling like something is caught to it feeling like its on fire. Today is 6/23 and I go to the ent doc on 6/25 so at least I am going. The throat issue comes and goes but it seems never goes away. It went from full on assault (pain like burning, adams apple sore, pain to talk to feeling like muscles are super tense) to almost nothing. Then to go a half on assault with new sinus pains in rear of nostrils that feels like a cold coming on.  I started using flonase to help with allergies which it has, watch my diet and limit caffeine. I know I sound like a wuss but this old man is getting worn out with this stuff. I would be lying if I told you I am not scared to go to the doctor but why was I not scared when I chewed. Why was I not scared to go to the dentist but I am now? Why was I not scared when we I saw the cancer pics? Why was I not scared when my wifes coworkers husband was diagnosed with cancer and had a good amount of his jaw removed. Why was I not scared then but am now? The biggest thing that I would like is to be free of nicotine forever and only going odaat is the way. In the mean time I look to vets for help as they have all been thru this. I pray that all the newbies will find this post and have it help them also. This nasty addiction will not hold me back from reaching more and more days. I quit with you today and I will continue to post roll as long as my fingers and God lets me. God bless all of you and whatever info I receive I will be forever grateful for, thank you.

[Indrek]

Had shitloads of problems with depression first and then with anxiety. For me its pretty much normal now... 200+ days after quit. Oh and its a new normal, way better normal than being nic slave normal. I get some rare anxiety reminders that i can mostly just brush off with ease and those seem to fade away too. I was a pretty heavy user too. Just keep grinding and i promise you will not look back when the good days come.

[Thefranks5]

Thanks Muleman, I have always kept my circle of friends small and keep to myself. My wife says I can be very difficult getting close to because of the wall I put up.
But it is by the grace of God that I have another opportunity to correct myself. I pray everyday that I did not wait too long and that the symptoms I feel are just me detoxing and not something sinister. The best thing I have ever done is get right with God, second best is marrying the love of my life and third is quit tobacco. Tobacco is third because without God and my wife tobacco would still be here. I lurked on this site thinking I didn’t need help but boy was I wrong. I am so glad that God steered me to the site as it is now part of the family.  As we all know that God comforts us from heaven but nothing beats the words or voice spoken or sent to us personally. I will be reaching out to those with my digits that have reached out to me. Thank you again for your words of support and as always God bless you brother.

[MuleMan]

Let me start by saying thanks again. I smoked for 10 years and then chewed either grizzly natural or copenhagen For 20 so I did seem to use the worst of the worst. My throat issues started about six weeks in to my quit and at 92 days now. My coffee intake hasn’t changed. About 2-3 cups in morning then another pick me up in afternoon. I have started to pound the bigs punkin seeds and trident spearmint gum. I have used smokey mountain classic, wintergreen and baccoff natural but have found the cayenne pepper does aggravate my mouth and throat. Its been 24 hours since I have used them and today I actually woke up feeling good. I then had a cup of sheetz coffee with my lunch today and got the sore throat and gut pains. As I write this the gut pains are gone but throat still tender and voice is a cracky. I agree on the coffee as my wife keeps telling me how bad it is. Now is a good time to slow that down also and see. I have been to family doctor but haven’t had my throat scoped. Weird how I never had issues until now after my body no longer has the garbage coating everything. I have fall allergies that give me the throat issues but meds would calm them down but it does not touch these symptoms. I have had hay fever and ragweed allergies since I was a kid. I have no desire to go back to tobacco but man now I know why people cave. I keep telling my wife that I am so tired of feeling like shit everyday. Thanks to all for letting me ramble on. Everybody on this site is another part of our support group that we desperately need. I will stay quit forever because it is by the grace of God that I have once again been given another chance to quit and I WILL BEAT THIS DAMN THING. God bless all who are helping and may my words help others.

dude @Thefranks5 keep blogging it out here. I can tell your an extrovert like me. Good for your soul.

I resonate with the anxiety and depression and mood swings. It’s a bitch to get control of.

Look at it this way. You have radically changed your body by refusing to dose it with nicotine all day every day for decades. Bad news- This is gonna take a long time to heal and rebalance. Good news - there are so many guys here having taken same path and reported success so we’re gonna win with persistence. Best news - if we let go of the anxiety and crushing feelings of potential difficult quit in weeks and months from now and just focus ODAAT it all becomes very manageable. I’m proud to quit with you. Fight hard today and get another win.

[Thefranks5]

Let me start by saying thanks again. I smoked for 10 years and then chewed either grizzly natural or copenhagen For 20 so I did seem to use the worst of the worst. My throat issues started about six weeks in to my quit and at 92 days now. My coffee intake hasn’t changed. About 2-3 cups in morning then another pick me up in afternoon. I have started to pound the bigs punkin seeds and trident spearmint gum. I have used smokey mountain classic, wintergreen and baccoff natural but have found the cayenne pepper does aggravate my mouth and throat. Its been 24 hours since I have used them and today I actually woke up feeling good. I then had a cup of sheetz coffee with my lunch today and got the sore throat and gut pains. As I write this the gut pains are gone but throat still tender and voice is a cracky. I agree on the coffee as my wife keeps telling me how bad it is. Now is a good time to slow that down also and see. I have been to family doctor but haven’t had my throat scoped. Weird how I never had issues until now after my body no longer has the garbage coating everything. I have fall allergies that give me the throat issues but meds would calm them down but it does not touch these symptoms. I have had hay fever and ragweed allergies since I was a kid. I have no desire to go back to tobacco but man now I know why people cave. I keep telling my wife that I am so tired of feeling like shit everyday. Thanks to all for letting me ramble on. Everybody on this site is another part of our support group that we desperately need. I will stay quit forever because it is by the grace of God that I have once again been given another chance to quit and I WILL BEAT THIS DAMN THING. God bless all who are helping and may my words help others.

[snahsorg]

Let's talk about your throat. I will preface this by telling you that I am not a doctor. However, I have had an adventure learning about my throat since quitting 654 days ago.

Whether you were a spitter or gutter, 30 years of dipping has to have some ramifications on your throat, right? I read somewhere that dipping changes the pH of your mouth. That article did not say whether your mouth returns to its pre-dipping pH at some point after quitting.

Do you have allergies? Do you have post nasal drip? Do you ever have bouts with tonsil stones? I can say yes to all 3 of these, and to this day they all make my throat hurt at times. They aren't linked to smokeless tobacco use either, at least in anything I have read.

Since quitting dip, do you find yourself drinking more coffee, soda, or other acidic beverages? I never really drank coffee until I quit dip. Then I drank 2-4 cups throughout the day and it wrecked my throat even more. After a while I quit drinking coffee, and my throat improved some.

Do you have acid reflux, or perhaps silent reflux? Caffeine can attribute to it too. Silent usually is not painful and comes with a feeling of something stuck in your throat. Medical articles call this a "globus" feeling or something like that. I had this and still get it every now and then.

I would recommend going to the doctor and getting checked out. They can't empathize with what you're going through, but they can check you for mouth, throat, neck, lymph node, etc. cancer. A clean bill of health lifts half the weight off your shoulders.