I remember how good the Beech Nut tasted after we soaked it with rainwater dripping from the gutter in the back yard of Mike Young's house. Mike was the cool kid at our Catholic school and I was cool to hang out with him, the year was 1973. I remember the massive buzz from the Skoal Wintergreen my brother and I got at The Yuma County Fair walking with my Dad and spitting- we were real cowboys in 1974! I remember the stadium spinning as I sat there with a big dip of Skoal in watching a high school football game and impressing all my new junior high buddies with the fact I was a dipper, it was 1977 and I was that guy.
Fast foward to 1985 and seeing Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon- wow you know that smoking makes you look cool- I think I will try it!! So you are waiting for the part where I get hooked In Junior high and dip a can a day until now.. well for whatever reason it never happened- I never dipped or smoked after my early experimentatiions and actually thought dip was for dips... all the way thru unitl I started smoking a bit after college and when I played the bass in a cover band and just used it to get home safe after a late night load out. I only smoked OP's (other peoples) and I was that guy who didn't have a pack or need a pack but would always bum yours and wait until he saw you again and bum another. From about 1990 to 2004 I might buy a pack of smokes and finish it in a month take a year off and then buy a pouch of Redman and fuck with that for a while and then not touch it for 2 years- not realizing all the while I was building an addiction.
I spent a lot of years being that guy that I grew to dislike- the guy that bums a dip but never buys his own and never seems to get addicted. The bull finally got pissed and gored that guy in 2004 and with the Nic bitch yelling encouragement we went to the 7-11 and got oursleves a can. The habit wasn't impressive- a can a week at first and ending with 3 cans a week- Grizzly Mint. To tell you the truth, at times I have felt odd being here because I didn't chew long and hard like some of us but my friend JpCrew told me it doesn't matter your brand/amount/length of time you are still an addict. So here I am and I was that guy. The new version of I was that guy is the recovered nicotine addict- 107 days and counting!
I'm 45 and part of what always kept me partially quit was a real respect and reguard for my health. Somehow in 2004 that went away and I just needed that bump and buzz to get thru things. I had so many obligations and jobs to do that tobacco just gave me a little edge. The guy that I was would come in my mind sometimes and berate me for having such a demanding master as nicotine and I would agree and try to quit.
I fould this site on day 14 of my new years quit. I was close to caving on day 13 preKTC but somehow made it thru and never looked back after i signed on here. This site has given me the information I needed to quit and just helped make sense of it all. I knew all my April FOQR's were there for me and never had to call and ask for help- just the thought of them kept me quit!!!
The hall of fame speeches are a big part of the site for newbies, and with that in mind I just want to encourage anyone reading this- if you are here you are an addict and admitting that will bring you great power. Face your advisary and know that happiness is your birth right and it can happen for you if you have the WILL to change your life. Nicotine is a very addictive drug that will kill you and as such can never bring you happiness, only pain. I remember toward the end of my dipping that I was dipping to avoid withdrawal not because I enjoyed it- is that you too?
The cost of Freedom is constant Vigilance- I am free from nicotine because I am WILLing to be Vigilant.
Thanks Rkymtnman, BBJ, JpCrew, ODT, NDrooster, Yammerhammer, Chewlessjim, 11x4, Ricko, Bighoss44, and all you other FOQR's for your support and the laughs. Thanks to the admin team and the mods!!
Thank you to our Men and Women in the Armed Services!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks lastly to Tom Kern- the angel of this site! He has brought a lot of dippers to the light of quitting! (
http://www.killthecan.org/facts/jennykern.asp)
Life is lived in the moment- be who you want to be--- NOW!
Dennis
